David Mitchell
@davidalanmitch5.bsky.social
Scottish. Moved all over,but now in Dunfermline. 40+. Usually open to sarcasm, impolite jokes and politics.
Liberal🌈🌊🦋💙
Also on Threads, same username
Liberal🌈🌊🦋💙
Also on Threads, same username
Reposted by David Mitchell
Nixon resigned for less…
Clinton was disgraced for less…
Donald Trump has turned this country into an embarrassing JOKE…
And still, nothing.
WHY?! 😎✨
Clinton was disgraced for less…
Donald Trump has turned this country into an embarrassing JOKE…
And still, nothing.
WHY?! 😎✨
September 17, 2026 at 4:59 PM
Nixon resigned for less…
Clinton was disgraced for less…
Donald Trump has turned this country into an embarrassing JOKE…
And still, nothing.
WHY?! 😎✨
Clinton was disgraced for less…
Donald Trump has turned this country into an embarrassing JOKE…
And still, nothing.
WHY?! 😎✨
Reposted by David Mitchell
I would kill for Tino
September 17, 2026 at 9:26 PM
I would kill for Tino
Reposted by David Mitchell
Asking 77 Million People How......?
September 18, 2026 at 11:01 AM
Asking 77 Million People How......?
I heard “A Little More” by Ed Sheeran in Tesco this morning and realised it might be the best self-own ever.
September 18, 2026 at 11:50 AM
I heard “A Little More” by Ed Sheeran in Tesco this morning and realised it might be the best self-own ever.
Reposted by David Mitchell
Dr Oz and kooky Fox Business host Taylor Riggs push vaccine skepticism: "We were told in April 2020 that if you got hit by a car but you also happened to have covid, they considered that a covid death. With the measles outbreak in Pennsylvania, are you dying with measles or from measles?"
September 18, 2026 at 11:41 AM
Dr Oz and kooky Fox Business host Taylor Riggs push vaccine skepticism: "We were told in April 2020 that if you got hit by a car but you also happened to have covid, they considered that a covid death. With the measles outbreak in Pennsylvania, are you dying with measles or from measles?"
Reposted by David Mitchell
Reposted by David Mitchell
"I am but skin & bones..."
September 16, 2026 at 5:14 PM
"I am but skin & bones..."
Reposted by David Mitchell
This isn't even debatable, we know that we'd all be dead.
September 16, 2026 at 1:00 PM
This isn't even debatable, we know that we'd all be dead.
Reposted by David Mitchell
Reposted by David Mitchell
The Treaty of Tripoli, which was negotiated and signed while George Washington was president:
"Art. 11. The Government of the United States of America is not in any sense founded on the Christian religion."
Q: How many times is Jesus mentioned in the Constitution?
A: Zero.
"Art. 11. The Government of the United States of America is not in any sense founded on the Christian religion."
Q: How many times is Jesus mentioned in the Constitution?
A: Zero.
September 16, 2026 at 5:06 PM
The Treaty of Tripoli, which was negotiated and signed while George Washington was president:
"Art. 11. The Government of the United States of America is not in any sense founded on the Christian religion."
Q: How many times is Jesus mentioned in the Constitution?
A: Zero.
"Art. 11. The Government of the United States of America is not in any sense founded on the Christian religion."
Q: How many times is Jesus mentioned in the Constitution?
A: Zero.
Reposted by David Mitchell
"Among the more absurd efforts to conceal McConnell’s decline, Tim Scott incredulously claimed he had a normal conversation with an engaged McConnell. Scott Jennings’s account of meeting with his supposedly lucid ex-boss is equally suspect. (As the kids like to say, 'video or it didn’t happen.')"
Retire in peace
McConnell is the latest example of an incapacitated politician refusing to let go.
www.publicnotice.co
September 17, 2026 at 8:07 PM
"Among the more absurd efforts to conceal McConnell’s decline, Tim Scott incredulously claimed he had a normal conversation with an engaged McConnell. Scott Jennings’s account of meeting with his supposedly lucid ex-boss is equally suspect. (As the kids like to say, 'video or it didn’t happen.')"
Reposted by David Mitchell
Vance is so cringe 😬
JD Vance Dragged After Posting Bizarre TikTok About Arresting Abdul El-Sayed For Having A 'Patchy Beard'
www.comicsands.com
September 17, 2026 at 8:17 PM
Vance is so cringe 😬
Reposted by David Mitchell
I always find myself looking at all the people behind him that just stand there, like this is normal, waiting for him to wake up.
September 16, 2026 at 1:02 PM
I always find myself looking at all the people behind him that just stand there, like this is normal, waiting for him to wake up.
Reposted by David Mitchell
September 17, 2026 at 10:32 AM
It’s Transformers The Movie Day!
Till All are One!
I’m going to watch Peter Cullen give the death scene that should have got an Oscar.
Till All are One!
I’m going to watch Peter Cullen give the death scene that should have got an Oscar.
September 17, 2026 at 10:36 AM
It’s Transformers The Movie Day!
Till All are One!
I’m going to watch Peter Cullen give the death scene that should have got an Oscar.
Till All are One!
I’m going to watch Peter Cullen give the death scene that should have got an Oscar.
Reposted by David Mitchell
Reposted by David Mitchell
Why Can’t Trump be held accountable for at least one crime he has committed ? Like murder or rape?
September 17, 2026 at 2:30 AM
Why Can’t Trump be held accountable for at least one crime he has committed ? Like murder or rape?
Reposted by David Mitchell
Still can't believe Ed Sheeran tried to pull the "there's kids at my show" to the dude who's message was "stop killing kids"
September 17, 2026 at 7:04 AM
Still can't believe Ed Sheeran tried to pull the "there's kids at my show" to the dude who's message was "stop killing kids"
Reposted by David Mitchell
Sometimes, I start writing a post, and then I read what I wrote and say, "Who cares?" and delete it.
September 17, 2026 at 12:35 AM
Sometimes, I start writing a post, and then I read what I wrote and say, "Who cares?" and delete it.
Reposted by David Mitchell
If a woman is uncomfortable watching you masturbate, do you think:
A) She’s a prude and not right for you.
B) She need more time to get used to that level of openness.
C) She should have sat somewhere else on the train.
A) She’s a prude and not right for you.
B) She need more time to get used to that level of openness.
C) She should have sat somewhere else on the train.
September 16, 2026 at 8:42 PM
If a woman is uncomfortable watching you masturbate, do you think:
A) She’s a prude and not right for you.
B) She need more time to get used to that level of openness.
C) She should have sat somewhere else on the train.
A) She’s a prude and not right for you.
B) She need more time to get used to that level of openness.
C) She should have sat somewhere else on the train.
Reposted by David Mitchell
Midnight Run = A+
Robert De Niro
Charles Grodin
Yaphet Kotto
John Ashton
Dennis Farina
Joe Pantoliano
Philip Baker Hall
Are you kidding me? Insanely fun cast.
Robert De Niro
Charles Grodin
Yaphet Kotto
John Ashton
Dennis Farina
Joe Pantoliano
Philip Baker Hall
Are you kidding me? Insanely fun cast.
September 17, 2026 at 5:31 AM
Midnight Run = A+
Robert De Niro
Charles Grodin
Yaphet Kotto
John Ashton
Dennis Farina
Joe Pantoliano
Philip Baker Hall
Are you kidding me? Insanely fun cast.
Robert De Niro
Charles Grodin
Yaphet Kotto
John Ashton
Dennis Farina
Joe Pantoliano
Philip Baker Hall
Are you kidding me? Insanely fun cast.
Reposted by David Mitchell
Nia Long rejoices as her star ⭐️ on the Hollywood Walk of Fame is revealed! 💃🏽💞
September 16, 2026 at 9:26 PM
Nia Long rejoices as her star ⭐️ on the Hollywood Walk of Fame is revealed! 💃🏽💞
Reposted by David Mitchell
Wouldn’t it be funny if all those folks who bought arsenals and armed themselves to the teeth to fight government tyranny suddenly realized what government tyranny actually looked like?
September 16, 2026 at 11:43 PM
Wouldn’t it be funny if all those folks who bought arsenals and armed themselves to the teeth to fight government tyranny suddenly realized what government tyranny actually looked like?
Reposted by David Mitchell
It’s funny, but also not funny at the same time.
September 16, 2026 at 11:18 PM
It’s funny, but also not funny at the same time.
Reposted by David Mitchell
The owner says: "My dog gives me daily reminders to literally stop and smell the roses"
September 16, 2026 at 10:59 PM
The owner says: "My dog gives me daily reminders to literally stop and smell the roses"