more mr. nice guy
@juniorhoncho.bsky.social
please don't yell at me while i'm on the phone
Pinned
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funny for whoever wrote that "the curtains are blue" post to use the color so commonly understood as symbolic that they named an emotion after it
September 22, 2026 at 7:56 AM
funny for whoever wrote that "the curtains are blue" post to use the color so commonly understood as symbolic that they named an emotion after it
my dearest love, you mean the world to me, and—actually... heh.. you know, for weeks i agonized over these vows, trying to find the perfect words to express my love. and after all that searching, i finally found them (tossing away index cards) in my heart:
I Thought My Colleague Was Simply A Plain Jane, But ... I Casually Pulled Some Shit On Her, And That Was All She Wrote. From There On, She Used Her Meaty Body, And Her Endless Lust, To Suck My Balls Dry All Night, And That's How It Went For Me. Ruka Inaba
September 22, 2026 at 6:48 AM
my dearest love, you mean the world to me, and—actually... heh.. you know, for weeks i agonized over these vows, trying to find the perfect words to express my love. and after all that searching, i finally found them (tossing away index cards) in my heart:
oh no, i love the keychain mr sinatra. it's uh. on my good keys. for special occasions
September 22, 2026 at 3:14 AM
oh no, i love the keychain mr sinatra. it's uh. on my good keys. for special occasions
Sonic & Tales from the Crypt
September 22, 2026 at 1:39 AM
Sonic & Tales from the Crypt
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i wouldn't even mind that they put a gun in space if they'd stop sending push notifications every time it's pointed at me
July 1, 2023 at 2:07 PM
i wouldn't even mind that they put a gun in space if they'd stop sending push notifications every time it's pointed at me
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they put a gun in space and they can point it at whoever they want
January 13, 2024 at 1:19 AM
they put a gun in space and they can point it at whoever they want
(face hidden behind the sunday paper) god it never ends with this prick. i'm so sick of reading about him week after week. sick of his dumbass hair and that smug grin. you think this is funny? you're ruining the fucking country, "Prince" Valiant
September 22, 2026 at 1:24 AM
(face hidden behind the sunday paper) god it never ends with this prick. i'm so sick of reading about him week after week. sick of his dumbass hair and that smug grin. you think this is funny? you're ruining the fucking country, "Prince" Valiant
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KANYE: yeah i'm just sayinnn ok, just cause nobody else is being honest like i am about MY self, you can't say i'm the ONLY one who would use a time machine to do, not supposed to say what, to baby hitler. molest
GAVIN NEWSOM: So you're from Chicago, any chance of a collab with the new pope? Ha Ha
GAVIN NEWSOM: So you're from Chicago, any chance of a collab with the new pope? Ha Ha
May 10, 2025 at 7:41 PM
KANYE: yeah i'm just sayinnn ok, just cause nobody else is being honest like i am about MY self, you can't say i'm the ONLY one who would use a time machine to do, not supposed to say what, to baby hitler. molest
GAVIN NEWSOM: So you're from Chicago, any chance of a collab with the new pope? Ha Ha
GAVIN NEWSOM: So you're from Chicago, any chance of a collab with the new pope? Ha Ha
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after hillary clinton's What Happened, kamala harris's sequel Why Happening Happens has been a huge disappointment. but party faithful are abuzz with anticipation for either pete buttigieg's What It Is Which Has Happened or gavin newsom's Listen Up Worms, This Does NOT Happen To Gavin FUCKING Newsom
September 24, 2025 at 1:05 AM
after hillary clinton's What Happened, kamala harris's sequel Why Happening Happens has been a huge disappointment. but party faithful are abuzz with anticipation for either pete buttigieg's What It Is Which Has Happened or gavin newsom's Listen Up Worms, This Does NOT Happen To Gavin FUCKING Newsom
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Gavin Newsom DESTROYS Trump: "Almost as bad as a homeless guy!"
August 17, 2025 at 8:11 AM
Gavin Newsom DESTROYS Trump: "Almost as bad as a homeless guy!"
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Voight-Kampff Test Proctor: you see a tortoise on it's ba—
Newsom: don't care. next question
Newsom: don't care. next question
May 31, 2025 at 4:24 AM
Voight-Kampff Test Proctor: you see a tortoise on it's ba—
Newsom: don't care. next question
Newsom: don't care. next question
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i love you president teeth. i mean president newteeth. no. president toothsome. presidenture newteeth some. FUCK i. love. president. chewsom
August 24, 2025 at 3:47 PM
i love you president teeth. i mean president newteeth. no. president toothsome. presidenture newteeth some. FUCK i. love. president. chewsom
whoa... so Magellan had no idea he was gellin'
September 21, 2026 at 11:22 PM
whoa... so Magellan had no idea he was gellin'
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told my neighbor her cat is in my apartment eating kibble all day every day and she goes "oh god seriously? we have him on a raw food diet to lose weight" and i'm not one to tell somebody how to raise their kids but lady, if your cat is outside all day you do not have him on a diet
he is now staring at the food from one inch away
August 2, 2024 at 3:49 PM
told my neighbor her cat is in my apartment eating kibble all day every day and she goes "oh god seriously? we have him on a raw food diet to lose weight" and i'm not one to tell somebody how to raise their kids but lady, if your cat is outside all day you do not have him on a diet
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good lord man
September 1, 2024 at 2:36 AM
good lord man
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smart money's on SI
September 19, 2026 at 5:49 PM
smart money's on SI
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pac-man sound
Open Up for Big Cum Shots 200 Times!
September 20, 2026 at 9:11 AM
pac-man sound
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FAMILY MATTERS: they clulled the cure
September 20, 2026 at 3:50 AM
FAMILY MATTERS: they clulled the cure
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having a pretty good time with Dino Danger on Dumdum Street or whatever
September 20, 2026 at 8:51 PM
having a pretty good time with Dino Danger on Dumdum Street or whatever
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