Klixy Shijou
@klixyshijou.bsky.social
hi im 9 and i like xenoblade
Okay, why does my son who has to wear those clear backpaccks because of the machete incident last year get bullied for reading naked lunch
October 4, 2026 at 10:53 PM
Okay, why does my son who has to wear those clear backpaccks because of the machete incident last year get bullied for reading naked lunch
Autism grenade, Noise gun, Bad smell cannon, Okay maybe a bomb that has aerolized evil semen that impregnates a city with 6ft tall winged bugs Diabetes Ray Crazy Magnet that fucks your blood up Big ass Magnet bomb
September 21, 2026 at 9:52 AM
Autism grenade, Noise gun, Bad smell cannon, Okay maybe a bomb that has aerolized evil semen that impregnates a city with 6ft tall winged bugs Diabetes Ray Crazy Magnet that fucks your blood up Big ass Magnet bomb
For not making a 9/11 (or charlie kirk!!) joke this year im in the black by a quadrillion ducats on my karmic scale and now have carte blance for the next dongducunicumcenterillion years, but it was all really because of yearly hajj on cirno day which is a week of meth and lots of fruit and a tarp
September 14, 2026 at 1:52 PM
For not making a 9/11 (or charlie kirk!!) joke this year im in the black by a quadrillion ducats on my karmic scale and now have carte blance for the next dongducunicumcenterillion years, but it was all really because of yearly hajj on cirno day which is a week of meth and lots of fruit and a tarp
Theyre not letting me buy paintball guns because im a 9 year old anime
September 14, 2026 at 1:46 PM
Theyre not letting me buy paintball guns because im a 9 year old anime
I don't get the style of ironic humor people on this site employ
September 6, 2026 at 12:09 AM
I don't get the style of ironic humor people on this site employ
Getting assaulted while I'm astral projecting into cyberspace by technospiritual border police like ive got the fucking mana to wait out the paperwork and conversion process to digitize my consciousness temporarily just to peep on what kim jong un is using Mr President level clearance to jack off to
September 4, 2026 at 6:10 AM
Getting assaulted while I'm astral projecting into cyberspace by technospiritual border police like ive got the fucking mana to wait out the paperwork and conversion process to digitize my consciousness temporarily just to peep on what kim jong un is using Mr President level clearance to jack off to
Having a cosplayer kick your nuts at a con isn't special like dont even film it bro like please straight up boring cbtslop YES BRO I GET IT SHIMAKAZE TOTALLY NAILED MY BALLS!!! OMG!!! At the anime con im eating turkey legs walking around burping in peoples faces i hate you motherfuckers
August 31, 2026 at 7:00 AM
Having a cosplayer kick your nuts at a con isn't special like dont even film it bro like please straight up boring cbtslop YES BRO I GET IT SHIMAKAZE TOTALLY NAILED MY BALLS!!! OMG!!! At the anime con im eating turkey legs walking around burping in peoples faces i hate you motherfuckers
Evolutionarily optimizing ideal form for a mate, a beast of burden queen termite type thing with a ton of weeping nipples but it is agile like a big old centipede, maybe its giant milk sacs can be expressed at will, like normally hidden under a carapace like beetle wings, a defensive stench emits
August 31, 2026 at 6:49 AM
Evolutionarily optimizing ideal form for a mate, a beast of burden queen termite type thing with a ton of weeping nipples but it is agile like a big old centipede, maybe its giant milk sacs can be expressed at will, like normally hidden under a carapace like beetle wings, a defensive stench emits
Lake Bulbous Purple Tipped Creamcannon had a mass die-off of Popolenmoi larvae and there's a thick pearlescent, fatty paste that's floating on the water, washing up in thick gobs. Still good fishing on the side with the chemical plant though
August 28, 2026 at 9:00 AM
Lake Bulbous Purple Tipped Creamcannon had a mass die-off of Popolenmoi larvae and there's a thick pearlescent, fatty paste that's floating on the water, washing up in thick gobs. Still good fishing on the side with the chemical plant though
I would like it if everyone stopped disrespecting clowns
August 26, 2026 at 10:36 AM
I would like it if everyone stopped disrespecting clowns
The halfway house pussy hunter guy becomes a taxi service to any corner store for the necessary gear oil like cigs and to see one of these guys in their natural habitat is crazy because there's nowhere else they'd rather be. I'm not jealous because i know i could never be so brave, respect.
August 26, 2026 at 10:32 AM
The halfway house pussy hunter guy becomes a taxi service to any corner store for the necessary gear oil like cigs and to see one of these guys in their natural habitat is crazy because there's nowhere else they'd rather be. I'm not jealous because i know i could never be so brave, respect.
Cannibal holocaust but its BL
August 24, 2026 at 1:51 PM
Cannibal holocaust but its BL
When the game promises shocking and disturbing content in the intro but there's no Thermo
August 21, 2026 at 4:56 PM
When the game promises shocking and disturbing content in the intro but there's no Thermo
How old does a car have to be to stay haunted the kraut ghost i lured into my car with candle tricks got unreasonably pissed off trying to understand the direktschaltgetriebe and gave me some kind of manic diarhhea curse that im trying to ward off with herbal enemas
August 19, 2026 at 12:39 PM
How old does a car have to be to stay haunted the kraut ghost i lured into my car with candle tricks got unreasonably pissed off trying to understand the direktschaltgetriebe and gave me some kind of manic diarhhea curse that im trying to ward off with herbal enemas
West coast mages are all scientologists using the slave labor they extract from their followers to make a terrifying underground architectural anomaly like the pathologic polyhedron or whatever
East coast mages are accidentally contacting the Angel of Eternity and getting searing nonstop orgasms
East coast mages are accidentally contacting the Angel of Eternity and getting searing nonstop orgasms
August 16, 2026 at 10:40 PM
West coast mages are all scientologists using the slave labor they extract from their followers to make a terrifying underground architectural anomaly like the pathologic polyhedron or whatever
East coast mages are accidentally contacting the Angel of Eternity and getting searing nonstop orgasms
East coast mages are accidentally contacting the Angel of Eternity and getting searing nonstop orgasms
Demiurge fucked my wife
August 10, 2026 at 4:56 AM
Demiurge fucked my wife
People getting giddy over "old man yaoi" and in my head its sergei lavrov being full nelsoned so hard his jowls jiggle nonstop and he shrieks like a gibbon dancing on hot coals while robocop mechanically drills his hole into a frothy humid paste This Is Your Mind On Eastern European Politics
August 10, 2026 at 4:55 AM
People getting giddy over "old man yaoi" and in my head its sergei lavrov being full nelsoned so hard his jowls jiggle nonstop and he shrieks like a gibbon dancing on hot coals while robocop mechanically drills his hole into a frothy humid paste This Is Your Mind On Eastern European Politics
How much you gotta hammer down to get one of those realistic stumpy style political cartoonists to go all chibi porn and start drawing super deformed zelensky with a fuckin nasty smegmatic tip hanging brain
August 4, 2026 at 4:57 AM
How much you gotta hammer down to get one of those realistic stumpy style political cartoonists to go all chibi porn and start drawing super deformed zelensky with a fuckin nasty smegmatic tip hanging brain
Imagine if cte turned you into an eyelash fluttering bottom instead of a guy who gets posessed the spirit of chris benoit suddenly at dinner one night
August 2, 2026 at 10:45 PM
Imagine if cte turned you into an eyelash fluttering bottom instead of a guy who gets posessed the spirit of chris benoit suddenly at dinner one night
At japanese arcades they make you turn around and walk into traffic to kill yourself if you die first stage in shmups for the disrespect of wasting your credit thats why they never exported them
July 30, 2026 at 7:38 AM
At japanese arcades they make you turn around and walk into traffic to kill yourself if you die first stage in shmups for the disrespect of wasting your credit thats why they never exported them
Painted on the side of my dodge grand caravan APPLES ARE DEATH FUNGUS GODS PENISES. VAMPIRIC FUNGUS WIRELESSLY EXTRACTS TEETH BLOOD TO MEGAGOD. TEETH BLOOD IS HIGHER IN IMPORTANCE TO COSMICWIDE FUNGUS HARVESTING BLOOD MAKE IT STRONGER AND DEAD""LIAR"' ALL BLOOD IS POTENTIALLY ENERGY FOR MEGAGOD BUT
July 30, 2026 at 7:33 AM
Painted on the side of my dodge grand caravan APPLES ARE DEATH FUNGUS GODS PENISES. VAMPIRIC FUNGUS WIRELESSLY EXTRACTS TEETH BLOOD TO MEGAGOD. TEETH BLOOD IS HIGHER IN IMPORTANCE TO COSMICWIDE FUNGUS HARVESTING BLOOD MAKE IT STRONGER AND DEAD""LIAR"' ALL BLOOD IS POTENTIALLY ENERGY FOR MEGAGOD BUT
Pulled over, cop at window: Dr. Benway on my left shoulder: "...ON ALL FOURS, MY OFFICER IS THE NEW PARENT TO A LITTER OF RAT PUPS. HIS COLON HAS BEEN GIVEN A COCKTAIL OF MIRACLE DRUGS TO ACT AS INCUBATOR FOR PESTS, WITH THIS, I CA-..."
Gringo on my right "Tell him he has mustard on his shirt..."
Gringo on my right "Tell him he has mustard on his shirt..."
July 27, 2026 at 4:38 AM
Pulled over, cop at window: Dr. Benway on my left shoulder: "...ON ALL FOURS, MY OFFICER IS THE NEW PARENT TO A LITTER OF RAT PUPS. HIS COLON HAS BEEN GIVEN A COCKTAIL OF MIRACLE DRUGS TO ACT AS INCUBATOR FOR PESTS, WITH THIS, I CA-..."
Gringo on my right "Tell him he has mustard on his shirt..."
Gringo on my right "Tell him he has mustard on his shirt..."
Marisa kirisame killing aleister crowley in a rear naked choke
July 25, 2026 at 12:18 PM
Marisa kirisame killing aleister crowley in a rear naked choke
The aliens come and they have brutally funny speech impediments but are crazy smart and give that type III civilization head that busts all the capillaries in your dick mAking it look like an overcooked lobster in a sauna for a week but you have that post workout pump haze for a month straight
July 21, 2026 at 1:41 PM
The aliens come and they have brutally funny speech impediments but are crazy smart and give that type III civilization head that busts all the capillaries in your dick mAking it look like an overcooked lobster in a sauna for a week but you have that post workout pump haze for a month straight