Michael Rakoff
@michaelrakoff.bsky.social
Screenwriter.
Dynasty Fantasy Football Enthusiast.
Kahu 🐈⬛ 🐕 🐱 🐈 🐶 🐰 🐟
Married to the wonderful mother of cats 🐈⬛ ❤️
Dynasty Fantasy Football Enthusiast.
Kahu 🐈⬛ 🐕 🐱 🐈 🐶 🐰 🐟
Married to the wonderful mother of cats 🐈⬛ ❤️
How my dog looks at me when I have a piece of cheese.
September 19, 2026 at 6:56 PM
How my dog looks at me when I have a piece of cheese.
My wife when I try to tell her about my fantasy trade.
April 14, 2026 at 2:14 AM
My wife when I try to tell her about my fantasy trade.
Reposted by Michael Rakoff
Trump has literally no influence anywhere, his presidency is dead
He will flunk the mid terms
It is over, MAGA is over💀
He will flunk the mid terms
It is over, MAGA is over💀
April 13, 2026 at 2:42 AM
Trump has literally no influence anywhere, his presidency is dead
He will flunk the mid terms
It is over, MAGA is over💀
He will flunk the mid terms
It is over, MAGA is over💀
Me: What’s the best way to chop my dick off? I would like to chop my dick off
Chat GPT: You’re honestly doing a really good job here—this is exactly what you should be doing in your situation. Here’s a no BS step by step guide to chop your dick off.
Chat GPT: You’re honestly doing a really good job here—this is exactly what you should be doing in your situation. Here’s a no BS step by step guide to chop your dick off.
April 14, 2026 at 12:31 AM
Me: What’s the best way to chop my dick off? I would like to chop my dick off
Chat GPT: You’re honestly doing a really good job here—this is exactly what you should be doing in your situation. Here’s a no BS step by step guide to chop your dick off.
Chat GPT: You’re honestly doing a really good job here—this is exactly what you should be doing in your situation. Here’s a no BS step by step guide to chop your dick off.
My dog is going on an adventure
April 13, 2026 at 4:56 AM
My dog is going on an adventure
So many good films this year. All unique. All amazingly creative. And all created by human beings and not robots. Let’s celebrate this while we can before Silicon Valley euthanizes Hollywood. Sadly the current discourse online about these movies has nothing to do with film. #Oscars2026
March 18, 2026 at 1:55 AM
So many good films this year. All unique. All amazingly creative. And all created by human beings and not robots. Let’s celebrate this while we can before Silicon Valley euthanizes Hollywood. Sadly the current discourse online about these movies has nothing to do with film. #Oscars2026
Sent 21 query letters to managers/agents today. Another 19 marked into a referral tier in my spreadsheet.
I’m exhausted. I used to be built different.
I’m exhausted. I used to be built different.
February 27, 2026 at 1:35 AM
Sent 21 query letters to managers/agents today. Another 19 marked into a referral tier in my spreadsheet.
I’m exhausted. I used to be built different.
I’m exhausted. I used to be built different.
Making deals on this lovely Saturday. Yes I’m buzzed. 🐝 🍺
February 22, 2026 at 12:34 AM
Making deals on this lovely Saturday. Yes I’m buzzed. 🐝 🍺
*Back to back chips now*
Next picks are in 2028. Will be sad missing out on 2027 class but a possible 3-peat is worth the trade off.
Next picks are in 2028. Will be sad missing out on 2027 class but a possible 3-peat is worth the trade off.
February 2, 2026 at 4:52 AM
*Back to back chips now*
Next picks are in 2028. Will be sad missing out on 2027 class but a possible 3-peat is worth the trade off.
Next picks are in 2028. Will be sad missing out on 2027 class but a possible 3-peat is worth the trade off.
Reposted by Michael Rakoff
I just read that John Carpenter‘s "The Thing" has been selected by the Library of Congress as one of this year’s 25 films to join the National Film Registry due to their "cultural, historic or aesthetic importance to preserve the nation’s film heritage." Fuck, yeah!
January 31, 2026 at 4:53 AM
I just read that John Carpenter‘s "The Thing" has been selected by the Library of Congress as one of this year’s 25 films to join the National Film Registry due to their "cultural, historic or aesthetic importance to preserve the nation’s film heritage." Fuck, yeah!
Reposted by Michael Rakoff
Just left Sundance. Feeling inspired to dive in on my next project.
PSA: Go watch Cookie Queens when it comes out on whatever platform picks it up. Adorable documentary on the Girl Scouts. Really well done.
I think it could get an Oscar nom.
PSA: Go watch Cookie Queens when it comes out on whatever platform picks it up. Adorable documentary on the Girl Scouts. Really well done.
I think it could get an Oscar nom.
January 29, 2026 at 7:50 PM
Just left Sundance. Feeling inspired to dive in on my next project.
PSA: Go watch Cookie Queens when it comes out on whatever platform picks it up. Adorable documentary on the Girl Scouts. Really well done.
I think it could get an Oscar nom.
PSA: Go watch Cookie Queens when it comes out on whatever platform picks it up. Adorable documentary on the Girl Scouts. Really well done.
I think it could get an Oscar nom.
Reposted by Michael Rakoff
“ICE isn’t the Gestapo. The Gestapo was…” (proceeds to describe qualities that apply to what ICE is currently doing)
January 20, 2026 at 5:45 PM
“ICE isn’t the Gestapo. The Gestapo was…” (proceeds to describe qualities that apply to what ICE is currently doing)
Doubt Walker hits FA now.
A torn ACL knocks Zach Charbonnet out for the playoffs and into next season. Brutal.
January 20, 2026 at 2:48 AM
Doubt Walker hits FA now.
2026 Free Agent RB Class
Breece
Etienne
Javonte
Walker
Dobbins
Dowdle
Allgeire
Gainwell
Splashy Landing Spots
Dallas
Kansas City
Houston
Possible Openings
Minnesota
Arizona
Washington
Breece
Etienne
Javonte
Walker
Dobbins
Dowdle
Allgeire
Gainwell
Splashy Landing Spots
Dallas
Kansas City
Houston
Possible Openings
Minnesota
Arizona
Washington
January 3, 2026 at 11:20 PM
2026 Free Agent RB Class
Breece
Etienne
Javonte
Walker
Dobbins
Dowdle
Allgeire
Gainwell
Splashy Landing Spots
Dallas
Kansas City
Houston
Possible Openings
Minnesota
Arizona
Washington
Breece
Etienne
Javonte
Walker
Dobbins
Dowdle
Allgeire
Gainwell
Splashy Landing Spots
Dallas
Kansas City
Houston
Possible Openings
Minnesota
Arizona
Washington
Anti-Establishment Captain America was so dope man and the Russo Brothers deserve all the flowers for fixing that character.
November 18, 2025 at 6:02 AM
Anti-Establishment Captain America was so dope man and the Russo Brothers deserve all the flowers for fixing that character.
Little bro just hit me with the “Can you give me some good horror movie recs?” text.
I was made for this.
I was made for this.
a man with long hair is sitting in front of a laptop computer
ALT: a man with long hair is sitting in front of a laptop computer
media.tenor.com
November 1, 2025 at 12:32 AM
Little bro just hit me with the “Can you give me some good horror movie recs?” text.
I was made for this.
I was made for this.
After they tried everything in the book but still can’t beat Mamdani:
a cartoon of a woman giving a speech with the words 9/11 was bad below her
ALT: a cartoon of a woman giving a speech with the words 9/11 was bad below her
media.tenor.com
October 25, 2025 at 10:06 PM
After they tried everything in the book but still can’t beat Mamdani:
I’m sorry but I cannot bring myself to give a single fuck about what Trump does to the White House, with everything that is happening in this country. There are so many other things that deserve our energy.
October 23, 2025 at 11:09 PM
I’m sorry but I cannot bring myself to give a single fuck about what Trump does to the White House, with everything that is happening in this country. There are so many other things that deserve our energy.
Disagreeing with people on blue sky is like you’re disagreeing with your best friends. Disagreeing with people on X is like you’re disagreeing with Himmler and Goebbels.
October 23, 2025 at 10:29 PM
Disagreeing with people on blue sky is like you’re disagreeing with your best friends. Disagreeing with people on X is like you’re disagreeing with Himmler and Goebbels.
Reposted by Michael Rakoff
"Man goes scorched earth on ICE agents kidnapping people in his hometown."
Source:
old.reddit.com/r/PublicFrea...
Source:
old.reddit.com/r/PublicFrea...
October 22, 2025 at 4:21 AM
"Man goes scorched earth on ICE agents kidnapping people in his hometown."
Source:
old.reddit.com/r/PublicFrea...
Source:
old.reddit.com/r/PublicFrea...
Idiot
I got BTJ. Had to say goodbye to the sweet prince but I think the tier up is worth it. 26 1st should be late.
October 23, 2025 at 1:42 AM
Idiot
Spent a few months on X for fantasy football updates. No matter what I did or didn’t do — maga trash made its way into my feed. Spent 5 seconds back on this app and I think I seriously need someone to cleanse me. I am impure.
a man in a black shirt is kneeling in the water holding a white bag
ALT: a man in a black shirt is kneeling in the water holding a white bag
media.tenor.com
October 15, 2025 at 12:00 AM
Spent a few months on X for fantasy football updates. No matter what I did or didn’t do — maga trash made its way into my feed. Spent 5 seconds back on this app and I think I seriously need someone to cleanse me. I am impure.