🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
@sassycanadian0.bsky.social
Bios are overrated just like sleep.
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:xtwlmhhwp4llw4uxlqewuqr2/feed/aaafydvcmgdx4
Pinned
I think we should bring back waking up on Saturday mornings and watching cartoons.
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
Crazy how everybody stops bothering you at work, if you just wear a big red bow on your tall green hat
October 3, 2026 at 10:15 AM
Crazy how everybody stops bothering you at work, if you just wear a big red bow on your tall green hat
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
Whenever I drive past the psychic's empty parking lot, I think, if I was psychic I would only be open on the days I knew people were coming.
October 3, 2026 at 12:28 PM
Whenever I drive past the psychic's empty parking lot, I think, if I was psychic I would only be open on the days I knew people were coming.
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
No autocorrect! I meant douche (not touché)
October 3, 2026 at 12:06 AM
No autocorrect! I meant douche (not touché)
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The sad part is I’m a nomad that’s been stuck in the same place for way too long. 
October 2, 2026 at 12:43 PM
The sad part is I’m a nomad that’s been stuck in the same place for way too long. 
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Back on my bullshit... baking on a Friday night
October 2, 2026 at 10:05 PM
Back on my bullshit... baking on a Friday night
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One day I’ll be rich enough to buy a super fast car and drive it really slow
October 2, 2026 at 11:57 PM
One day I’ll be rich enough to buy a super fast car and drive it really slow
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Men with mid tattoos will go on Survivor instead of going to therapy
October 3, 2026 at 3:27 AM
Men with mid tattoos will go on Survivor instead of going to therapy
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Math discoveries while asleep were the start of the theoREM
October 3, 2026 at 6:22 AM
Math discoveries while asleep were the start of the theoREM
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
I'll repost almost anything but I draw the line at pooping and farting. Idk I'm complex like that
October 3, 2026 at 1:17 AM
I'll repost almost anything but I draw the line at pooping and farting. Idk I'm complex like that
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
Wish I loved anything as much as Bluesky loves suggesting accounts that want nothing to do with me
October 3, 2026 at 1:43 AM
Wish I loved anything as much as Bluesky loves suggesting accounts that want nothing to do with me
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
Tried to sue the airline for misplacing my luggage.
I lost the case.
I lost the case.
October 2, 2026 at 4:17 PM
Tried to sue the airline for misplacing my luggage.
I lost the case.
I lost the case.
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
Tried ordering books online and Amex froze my account for fraudulent behavior. They're like, this bitch doesn't read, and I totally get it.
October 2, 2026 at 8:11 PM
Tried ordering books online and Amex froze my account for fraudulent behavior. They're like, this bitch doesn't read, and I totally get it.
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
What’s the difference between an elevator and my parents?
An elevator can raise a child. Yeah.
An elevator can raise a child. Yeah.
October 2, 2026 at 10:25 PM
What’s the difference between an elevator and my parents?
An elevator can raise a child. Yeah.
An elevator can raise a child. Yeah.
Someone's effort is the reflection of their interest in you.
October 2, 2026 at 10:30 PM
Someone's effort is the reflection of their interest in you.
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
I have to tell you all, I started the week with a bottle of patience, but the bottle is almost empty now.
October 2, 2026 at 12:34 PM
I have to tell you all, I started the week with a bottle of patience, but the bottle is almost empty now.
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
A semicolon is just a regular colon that needs a fluffer
September 30, 2026 at 3:44 PM
A semicolon is just a regular colon that needs a fluffer
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
Pets should count for carpool
October 1, 2026 at 8:56 PM
Pets should count for carpool
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It’s called Spirit Halloween because of the hangover you’re left with
October 2, 2026 at 12:00 AM
It’s called Spirit Halloween because of the hangover you’re left with
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The Internet has made dumb people even dumber.
September 29, 2026 at 11:03 PM
The Internet has made dumb people even dumber.
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I hate concerts and you cannot convince me otherwise.
Too many people.
Too many people.
Music always sounds like shit.
Too loud.
Too many people.
You’re welcome.
Too many people.
Too many people.
Music always sounds like shit.
Too loud.
Too many people.
You’re welcome.
September 30, 2026 at 1:07 PM
I hate concerts and you cannot convince me otherwise.
Too many people.
Too many people.
Music always sounds like shit.
Too loud.
Too many people.
You’re welcome.
Too many people.
Too many people.
Music always sounds like shit.
Too loud.
Too many people.
You’re welcome.
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
I’m popular in all the wrong ways.
September 30, 2026 at 2:48 PM
I’m popular in all the wrong ways.
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
I bet it feels really good for the pedal to be pushed all the way to the metal. 
October 1, 2026 at 12:46 PM
I bet it feels really good for the pedal to be pushed all the way to the metal. 
Reposted by 🍁𝒮𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓎 𝒢𝒾𝓇𝓁 🤍
I’m tired of keeping up. 
October 1, 2026 at 12:52 PM
I’m tired of keeping up. 
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My time is owned by everyone but me.
October 1, 2026 at 4:28 PM
My time is owned by everyone but me.
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The best way to say hello is with a firm booty shake.
October 1, 2026 at 1:26 PM
The best way to say hello is with a firm booty shake.