Shakespearean Insult Bot
@shakespeareinsults.bsky.social
classics straight from the Bard & remixed bangers, every 6 hours.
made by @aliensunset.bsky.social
using https://bluebotsdonequick.com/
sibling to: https://beige.party/@shakespearean_Insults
https://alien-sunset.neocities.org/bots/Bots
made by @aliensunset.bsky.social
using https://bluebotsdonequick.com/
sibling to: https://beige.party/@shakespearean_Insults
https://alien-sunset.neocities.org/bots/Bots
You droning, boil-brained, hedge-born clotpole!
October 8, 2026 at 1:10 PM
You droning, boil-brained, hedge-born clotpole!
Thou ruttish, bunch-backed scurvy-knave!
October 8, 2026 at 7:10 AM
Thou ruttish, bunch-backed scurvy-knave!
You poisonous, full-gorged, sheep-biting pumpion!
October 8, 2026 at 1:10 AM
You poisonous, full-gorged, sheep-biting pumpion!
Thou art the cap of all the fools alive.
Timon of Athens (Act4, Scene 3)
Timon of Athens (Act4, Scene 3)
October 7, 2026 at 7:10 PM
Thou art the cap of all the fools alive.
Timon of Athens (Act4, Scene 3)
Timon of Athens (Act4, Scene 3)
I do desire that we may be better strangers.
As You Like It (ACt 3, Scene 2)
As You Like It (ACt 3, Scene 2)
October 7, 2026 at 1:10 PM
I do desire that we may be better strangers.
As You Like It (ACt 3, Scene 2)
As You Like It (ACt 3, Scene 2)
Thou fawning, sodden-witted coxcomb!
October 7, 2026 at 7:10 AM
Thou fawning, sodden-witted coxcomb!
Thou ruttish, clapper-clawed punk!
October 7, 2026 at 1:10 AM
Thou ruttish, clapper-clawed punk!
You babbling, plume-plucked, dizzy-eyed miscreant!
October 6, 2026 at 7:11 PM
You babbling, plume-plucked, dizzy-eyed miscreant!
You scullion! You rampallian! You fustilarian! I’ll tickle your catastrophe!
Henry IV Part 2 (Act 2, Scene 1)
Henry IV Part 2 (Act 2, Scene 1)
October 6, 2026 at 1:10 PM
You scullion! You rampallian! You fustilarian! I’ll tickle your catastrophe!
Henry IV Part 2 (Act 2, Scene 1)
Henry IV Part 2 (Act 2, Scene 1)
You yeasty, beef-witted, dizzy-eyed moldwarp!
October 6, 2026 at 7:10 AM
You yeasty, beef-witted, dizzy-eyed moldwarp!
Thou craven, swag-bellied leprous witch!
October 6, 2026 at 1:10 AM
Thou craven, swag-bellied leprous witch!
Thou goatish, sodden-witted varlet!
October 5, 2026 at 7:10 PM
Thou goatish, sodden-witted varlet!
You dissembling, common-kissing, fly-bitten bag of guts!
October 5, 2026 at 1:10 PM
You dissembling, common-kissing, fly-bitten bag of guts!
Thou weedy, muddy-mottled vile worm!
October 5, 2026 at 7:10 AM
Thou weedy, muddy-mottled vile worm!
You rank, doghearted, idle-headed bully!
October 5, 2026 at 1:10 AM
You rank, doghearted, idle-headed bully!
You froward, fly-bitten, sodden-witted hag-seed!
October 4, 2026 at 7:11 PM
You froward, fly-bitten, sodden-witted hag-seed!
I do wish thou wert a dog, that I might love thee something.
Timon of Athens (Act 4, Scene 3)
Timon of Athens (Act 4, Scene 3)
October 4, 2026 at 1:10 PM
I do wish thou wert a dog, that I might love thee something.
Timon of Athens (Act 4, Scene 3)
Timon of Athens (Act 4, Scene 3)
You degenerate, tickle-brained, pottle-deep drunkard!
October 4, 2026 at 7:10 AM
You degenerate, tickle-brained, pottle-deep drunkard!
They have a plentiful lack of wit.
Hamlet (ACt 2, Scene 2)
Hamlet (ACt 2, Scene 2)
October 4, 2026 at 1:10 AM
They have a plentiful lack of wit.
Hamlet (ACt 2, Scene 2)
Hamlet (ACt 2, Scene 2)
Thou imbecilic, fen-sucked bugbear!
October 3, 2026 at 7:10 PM
Thou imbecilic, fen-sucked bugbear!
She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs.
Two Gentlemen of Verona (Act 3, Scene 1)
Two Gentlemen of Verona (Act 3, Scene 1)
October 3, 2026 at 1:10 PM
She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs.
Two Gentlemen of Verona (Act 3, Scene 1)
Two Gentlemen of Verona (Act 3, Scene 1)
You rascally, rough-hewn, open-arsed tyrant!
October 3, 2026 at 7:10 AM
You rascally, rough-hewn, open-arsed tyrant!
Thou poisonous, flap-mouthed pigeon-egg!
October 3, 2026 at 1:10 AM
Thou poisonous, flap-mouthed pigeon-egg!
Thou mewling, muddy-mottled eunuch!
October 2, 2026 at 7:10 PM
Thou mewling, muddy-mottled eunuch!
Thou babbling, prick-eared plebian!
October 2, 2026 at 1:10 PM
Thou babbling, prick-eared plebian!