Zack Loran Clark
@zackloranclark.bsky.social
The funny thing about this image is that no one stole anything from Anakin. His entire family abandoned him in disgust. It's space-opera parental estrangement.
Why would George Lucas do this to George Lucas?
November 2, 2026 at 2:43 AM
The funny thing about this image is that no one stole anything from Anakin. His entire family abandoned him in disgust. It's space-opera parental estrangement.
The Millennial Curse is to have lived through the Golden Age of every cultural touchstone, then watch them turn to dust before our eyes.
BREAKING: Electronic Arts is cutting 400 jobs and shutting down BioWare, the legendary development studio behind Dragon Age and Mass Effect. www.bloomberg.com/news/article...
Electronic Arts to Cut 400 Jobs, Shut Down BioWare
The next ‘Mass Effect’ will be canceled as part of the layoffs
www.bloomberg.com
October 21, 2026 at 9:35 PM
The Millennial Curse is to have lived through the Golden Age of every cultural touchstone, then watch them turn to dust before our eyes.
Reposted by Zack Loran Clark
🎸 💓 COVER REVEAL for HE'S JUST SOME GUY (3/30/27). Illus by Dana Lédl, designed by Kelley Bradey. I am obsessed.
This book is a bit of an ode to music, and mostly an ode to creating and what success and failure look like, and if those things even matter
www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/807984...
This book is a bit of an ode to music, and mostly an ode to creating and what success and failure look like, and if those things even matter
www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/807984...
October 21, 2026 at 4:00 PM
🎸 💓 COVER REVEAL for HE'S JUST SOME GUY (3/30/27). Illus by Dana Lédl, designed by Kelley Bradey. I am obsessed.
This book is a bit of an ode to music, and mostly an ode to creating and what success and failure look like, and if those things even matter
www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/807984...
This book is a bit of an ode to music, and mostly an ode to creating and what success and failure look like, and if those things even matter
www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/807984...
Good news! The worst, most impulsive people in the country now have jet boosters on their cars.
October 16, 2026 at 8:40 PM
Good news! The worst, most impulsive people in the country now have jet boosters on their cars.
This is the couch guy? The couch guy decided to make gay jokes? That's fun.
JD Vance: "I love you too sir. In a totally platonic way, to be clear. I'm the vice president, not James Talarico."
October 13, 2026 at 5:20 PM
This is the couch guy? The couch guy decided to make gay jokes? That's fun.
There's a pile-on happening with Flanagan's interpretation of Carrie, but I'm convinced he'll be vindicated in the end. He took a big swing that was really fresh and compelling! And a slightly more open, curious Carrie haunted by cyberbullying fits better today than the mute little mouse of the 70s.
October 10, 2026 at 7:29 PM
There's a pile-on happening with Flanagan's interpretation of Carrie, but I'm convinced he'll be vindicated in the end. He took a big swing that was really fresh and compelling! And a slightly more open, curious Carrie haunted by cyberbullying fits better today than the mute little mouse of the 70s.
We're like three weeks away from the Hunger Games at this point.
If video games desensitize children to violence and murder, just think what watching public executions will do.
October 9, 2026 at 4:38 PM
We're like three weeks away from the Hunger Games at this point.
Four eps into @mikeflanaganfilm.com's new Carrie miniseries and I'm already blown away. God, it's so rich and upsetting and deeply bighearted. IMO, the best horror is rooted in tragedy, and this exemplifies that idea so well.
October 8, 2026 at 9:20 PM
Four eps into @mikeflanaganfilm.com's new Carrie miniseries and I'm already blown away. God, it's so rich and upsetting and deeply bighearted. IMO, the best horror is rooted in tragedy, and this exemplifies that idea so well.
*world-famous detective Hercule Poirot visits my sleepy town for a long weekend*
Me: Now is obviously the moment to carry out my intricately planned murder. The one I'm certain to be hanged for, if caught.
Me: Now is obviously the moment to carry out my intricately planned murder. The one I'm certain to be hanged for, if caught.
October 1, 2026 at 6:09 PM
*world-famous detective Hercule Poirot visits my sleepy town for a long weekend*
Me: Now is obviously the moment to carry out my intricately planned murder. The one I'm certain to be hanged for, if caught.
Me: Now is obviously the moment to carry out my intricately planned murder. The one I'm certain to be hanged for, if caught.
Reposted by Zack Loran Clark
Counterpoint: Bring me your fatties, your weirdos, your radicals yearning to breathe free.
Hegseth: "It's worth saying again so the fake news understands it. We are no longer the woke department or the weak department. Simple translation of that -- no fatties no trannies no beardos no weirdos no wimps no radicals. Just warriors."
September 30, 2026 at 7:23 PM
Counterpoint: Bring me your fatties, your weirdos, your radicals yearning to breathe free.
I think I just passed a women in Park Slope whose dog was named Espadrille?
September 9, 2026 at 10:01 PM
I think I just passed a women in Park Slope whose dog was named Espadrille?
Anyone else knee-jerk think this was RFK Jr?
i don’t think i’ve laughed so much at anything this year as much as i’ve laughed about this shit
September 5, 2026 at 7:44 PM
Anyone else knee-jerk think this was RFK Jr?
Reposted by Zack Loran Clark
the year is 2027. gas costs $83 and lettuce is at war with us. however every location on every map now says AMERICA
August 27, 2026 at 6:54 PM
the year is 2027. gas costs $83 and lettuce is at war with us. however every location on every map now says AMERICA
I know it's banal to call people sheep, but this audience is almost literally bred for the slaughterhouse. They cannot fathom the machinery that encloses them, much less the end that awaits. How do we pull ourselves out of this?
these people booing sound like literal sheep as Darline Graham criticizes Dr. Annie Andrews for supporting "government-run healthcare" before bragging of her parents that "if they were sick, they had to get up and go to work...my mother passed away when I was 11 and my father just over a year later"
August 26, 2026 at 10:39 PM
I know it's banal to call people sheep, but this audience is almost literally bred for the slaughterhouse. They cannot fathom the machinery that encloses them, much less the end that awaits. How do we pull ourselves out of this?
Reposted by Zack Loran Clark
Republicans have spent the last year trying to defund Dolly Parton
August 25, 2026 at 9:08 PM
Republicans have spent the last year trying to defund Dolly Parton
Reposted by Zack Loran Clark
"It's given a lot of people permission to be themselves, to not dream it, be it, which is the motto of the movie, really. I would like to be remembered for that."
Farewell to Tim Curry (1946-2026) #RIP
Farewell to Tim Curry (1946-2026) #RIP
August 26, 2026 at 3:50 PM
"It's given a lot of people permission to be themselves, to not dream it, be it, which is the motto of the movie, really. I would like to be remembered for that."
Farewell to Tim Curry (1946-2026) #RIP
Farewell to Tim Curry (1946-2026) #RIP
Reposted by Zack Loran Clark
Here's the official announcement of Parton's passing from her reps, along with the request that in lieu of flowers, the family asks for donations to be made to Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library at www.imaginationlibrary.com
August 25, 2026 at 6:02 PM
Here's the official announcement of Parton's passing from her reps, along with the request that in lieu of flowers, the family asks for donations to be made to Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library at www.imaginationlibrary.com
I know people can't live forever, but if anyone should have been the exception.
Dolly Parton dying hits so hard. She felt like one of those figures who always was and always will be. She felt like America when it was trying to be the place it promised to be. As beloved as her music is, it’s even better than people give it credit for. There won’t be another one like her.
August 25, 2026 at 7:13 PM
I know people can't live forever, but if anyone should have been the exception.
I came up with a joke about Cassandra, but no one believes me.
I came up with a joke about Orpheus, but it needs a second look
I came up with a joke about Penelope, but it kept unraveling
July 17, 2026 at 9:24 PM
I came up with a joke about Cassandra, but no one believes me.
One wonders if Graham thought he'd outlast Trump and be able to distance himself for posterity. Alas, he died as he lived, a soulless scarecrow hauled up as a short-term spectacle by the man.
WELKER: Iran says the Strait of Hormuz is closed. CENTCOM says it's open. Which is it?
TRUMP: It's open, and I don't want to talk about because I want to honor the life of Lindsey Graham, so I don't want to talk about it. I told you that before the call.
TRUMP: It's open, and I don't want to talk about because I want to honor the life of Lindsey Graham, so I don't want to talk about it. I told you that before the call.
July 12, 2026 at 3:00 PM
One wonders if Graham thought he'd outlast Trump and be able to distance himself for posterity. Alas, he died as he lived, a soulless scarecrow hauled up as a short-term spectacle by the man.
Isn't Eric Adams the US Ambassador to Albania now? Feels like there's a story there.
BEAUTIFUL: Protests are escalating against Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump’s $1.4 billion real estate development in Albania that’s encroaching on protected land and endangering wildlife. The people are fighting back! Share everywhere so this doesn’t get buried!
substack.com/@rawstory/no...
substack.com/@rawstory/no...
Raw America (@rawstory)
BEAUTIFUL: Protests are escalating against Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump’s $1.4 billion real estate development in Albania that’s encroaching on protected land and endangering wildlife. The people ar...
substack.com
June 4, 2026 at 7:03 PM
Isn't Eric Adams the US Ambassador to Albania now? Feels like there's a story there.
Reposted by Zack Loran Clark
I’m proud to be endorsed by Mayor Zohran Mamdani and I look forward to being a partner for him in Congress.
Meanwhile, my opponent couldn’t bring himself to endorse Zohran as the Democratic nominee in the general election, even when the alternative was serial sexual harasser Andrew Cuomo.
Meanwhile, my opponent couldn’t bring himself to endorse Zohran as the Democratic nominee in the general election, even when the alternative was serial sexual harasser Andrew Cuomo.
June 1, 2026 at 11:39 PM
I’m proud to be endorsed by Mayor Zohran Mamdani and I look forward to being a partner for him in Congress.
Meanwhile, my opponent couldn’t bring himself to endorse Zohran as the Democratic nominee in the general election, even when the alternative was serial sexual harasser Andrew Cuomo.
Meanwhile, my opponent couldn’t bring himself to endorse Zohran as the Democratic nominee in the general election, even when the alternative was serial sexual harasser Andrew Cuomo.
I do think crisps is a better word for chips, but must respectfully decline taking up chips in lieu of fries.
WE NEED BAD IRRELEVANT TAKES IMMEDIATELY
FLOOD THE TIMELINE
FLOOD THE TIMELINE
April 10, 2026 at 12:56 PM
I do think crisps is a better word for chips, but must respectfully decline taking up chips in lieu of fries.
Absolutely floored to discover this woman's name isn't really Philomena Cunk.
Diane Morgan will return as Philomena Cunk for a brand new series titled ‘CUNK ON CINEMA’.
Coming soon to BBC and Netflix.
#CunkOnCinema #PhilomenaCunk
🔗 variety.com/2026/tv/glob...
Coming soon to BBC and Netflix.
#CunkOnCinema #PhilomenaCunk
🔗 variety.com/2026/tv/glob...
April 9, 2026 at 8:58 PM
Absolutely floored to discover this woman's name isn't really Philomena Cunk.