(eliza)Beth!
@beth.banana.management
Fix your hearts or die. Middle aged and slightly awkward in Manhattan. Theoretically Oberlin Class of 2000 under a different name, shall we say.
She/her
She/her
Walking down Fifth Ave in Midtown for even just a single block is always a mistake.
September 16, 2026 at 8:15 PM
Walking down Fifth Ave in Midtown for even just a single block is always a mistake.
Well, huh, looks like I may be doing FFS in November...
September 16, 2026 at 4:12 PM
Well, huh, looks like I may be doing FFS in November...
I need an outdoor mirror to show how good this skirt looks in a light wind.
September 14, 2026 at 2:38 PM
I need an outdoor mirror to show how good this skirt looks in a light wind.
There's a guy parked outside my apartment with a heavily modified car with gull wing doors, blasting incredibly loud...chiptunes?
September 13, 2026 at 7:58 PM
There's a guy parked outside my apartment with a heavily modified car with gull wing doors, blasting incredibly loud...chiptunes?
I saw my voice coach on Friday, looking for some help tightening up my pitch range. She suggested practicing stretching my vowels through reciting something regularly. Which has led to me now re-memorizing Yeats' The Second Coming because why not.
September 13, 2026 at 6:08 PM
I saw my voice coach on Friday, looking for some help tightening up my pitch range. She suggested practicing stretching my vowels through reciting something regularly. Which has led to me now re-memorizing Yeats' The Second Coming because why not.
Another bit of pre move progress today. I'm still intimidated by the volume of clothes to dispose of, but everything else is starting to feel...not easy to manage exactly, but definitely manageable.
September 13, 2026 at 5:46 PM
Another bit of pre move progress today. I'm still intimidated by the volume of clothes to dispose of, but everything else is starting to feel...not easy to manage exactly, but definitely manageable.
I keep making the mistake of looking at Bluesky when I am not at all in the mood for whatever The Discourse is at the moment. Bad habit of mine.
September 13, 2026 at 4:29 PM
I keep making the mistake of looking at Bluesky when I am not at all in the mood for whatever The Discourse is at the moment. Bad habit of mine.
The last two times I moved, I had months between the move being scheduled and it actually happening, and I still ended up stressed out of my mind for the last few weeks. This time, I've got three weeks. Uhoh.
September 12, 2026 at 8:23 PM
The last two times I moved, I had months between the move being scheduled and it actually happening, and I still ended up stressed out of my mind for the last few weeks. This time, I've got three weeks. Uhoh.
I opted not to spend a couple hundred more bucks a month for a higher floor for my new apartment just to watch storms roll in…because I can just go up to the 51st floor lounge and roof deck to watch storms roll in instead.
September 12, 2026 at 7:20 PM
I opted not to spend a couple hundred more bucks a month for a higher floor for my new apartment just to watch storms roll in…because I can just go up to the 51st floor lounge and roof deck to watch storms roll in instead.
Ok, I actually managed to check off one task my pre-move todo list. It was probably the easiest (break down the giant pile of cardboard boxes I had lying around the apartment due to the lack of anywhere official to dispose of them in my dumpster fire of a building) but still, box checked.
September 12, 2026 at 3:02 PM
Ok, I actually managed to check off one task my pre-move todo list. It was probably the easiest (break down the giant pile of cardboard boxes I had lying around the apartment due to the lack of anywhere official to dispose of them in my dumpster fire of a building) but still, box checked.
I ordered a halter top from Aritzia (yeah, I’m 48 and I’m not Aritzia’s target market, shush) but it’s backless so I can’t wear my beloved push-up bras with it. Now I’m on a quest to find a suitably helpful strapless low back push-up bra. Wish me luck. Or a growth spurt.
September 11, 2026 at 9:17 PM
I ordered a halter top from Aritzia (yeah, I’m 48 and I’m not Aritzia’s target market, shush) but it’s backless so I can’t wear my beloved push-up bras with it. Now I’m on a quest to find a suitably helpful strapless low back push-up bra. Wish me luck. Or a growth spurt.
Not gonna lie, I'm a little disappointed that Liz Phair's setlist on her current tour is only about half songs from Exile in Guyville. I feel mean saying this, but I'm 100% there for the first album alone. =)
September 11, 2026 at 7:02 PM
Not gonna lie, I'm a little disappointed that Liz Phair's setlist on her current tour is only about half songs from Exile in Guyville. I feel mean saying this, but I'm 100% there for the first album alone. =)
Sooooo I signed a lease on a new apartment, and now I'm in a multi-day light panic attack at The Idea Of Change, the process of moving, and the fact that I'm technically breaking my lease to move. Sigh.
September 11, 2026 at 11:36 AM
Sooooo I signed a lease on a new apartment, and now I'm in a multi-day light panic attack at The Idea Of Change, the process of moving, and the fact that I'm technically breaking my lease to move. Sigh.
Reposted by (eliza)Beth!
Preorders of Beth March Returns from the Dead are ON DISCOUNT right NOW!
The Woodworking e-book is HEAVILY discounted right NOW!
Preorders of Every Time a Bell Rings, my It's a Wonderful Life book with Lauren Theisen, are ONGOING.
All that info HERE:
episodes.ghost.io/preorder-emi...
The Woodworking e-book is HEAVILY discounted right NOW!
Preorders of Every Time a Bell Rings, my It's a Wonderful Life book with Lauren Theisen, are ONGOING.
All that info HERE:
episodes.ghost.io/preorder-emi...
Preorder Emily's next novel! Save big money! Now!
Plus: The e-book of Woodworking is on sale too? Remember Woodworking?
episodes.ghost.io
September 10, 2026 at 8:24 PM
Preorders of Beth March Returns from the Dead are ON DISCOUNT right NOW!
The Woodworking e-book is HEAVILY discounted right NOW!
Preorders of Every Time a Bell Rings, my It's a Wonderful Life book with Lauren Theisen, are ONGOING.
All that info HERE:
episodes.ghost.io/preorder-emi...
The Woodworking e-book is HEAVILY discounted right NOW!
Preorders of Every Time a Bell Rings, my It's a Wonderful Life book with Lauren Theisen, are ONGOING.
All that info HERE:
episodes.ghost.io/preorder-emi...
Guess which girl finally made up for her anxiety and repressed Gender Feels freakout when she almost got her ears pierced over thirty years ago? This one, obviously.
September 10, 2026 at 9:04 PM
Guess which girl finally made up for her anxiety and repressed Gender Feels freakout when she almost got her ears pierced over thirty years ago? This one, obviously.
Reposted by (eliza)Beth!
Do you like ordering things I've written at a steep discount? Bookbub has the ebook of Woodworking available for just $1.99! It's a real honor to be featured by them in this fashion, and I hope you will check the book out!
www.bookbub.com/books/woodwo...
www.bookbub.com/books/woodwo...
Woodworking by Emily St. James is only $1.99 - BookBub
Highly anticipated by the Los Angeles Times, Kirkus Reviews, and many others, this bighearted and hilarious 2025 release is a must-read (Shelby Van Pelt, author of Remarkably Bright Creatures)! In a s...
www.bookbub.com
September 9, 2026 at 6:08 PM
Do you like ordering things I've written at a steep discount? Bookbub has the ebook of Woodworking available for just $1.99! It's a real honor to be featured by them in this fashion, and I hope you will check the book out!
www.bookbub.com/books/woodwo...
www.bookbub.com/books/woodwo...
About to watch Heathers in the theater and now I'm wondering whether this is where my thing for Christian Slater started or if it was the Gleaming the Cube ads in comic books. Though it definitely didn't really get going until I saw Pump Up The Volume.
September 7, 2026 at 6:00 PM
About to watch Heathers in the theater and now I'm wondering whether this is where my thing for Christian Slater started or if it was the Gleaming the Cube ads in comic books. Though it definitely didn't really get going until I saw Pump Up The Volume.
Ok, I’m a mope machine with the Sunday blues, no plans, and no one to go do something with, so it’s time for my periodic sad post asking if anyone I know in NYC has fun plan for the night that I could maybe join without it being weird?
I regret posting this before I even hit post.
I regret posting this before I even hit post.
September 6, 2026 at 9:32 PM
Ok, I’m a mope machine with the Sunday blues, no plans, and no one to go do something with, so it’s time for my periodic sad post asking if anyone I know in NYC has fun plan for the night that I could maybe join without it being weird?
I regret posting this before I even hit post.
I regret posting this before I even hit post.
Oh shit, I almost forgot my mom said she's comfortable with me updating my Facebook profile to reflect reality (she's already told her cousins re me), so it's time to momentarily confuse people from college I've had no contact with for decades.
September 6, 2026 at 6:09 PM
Oh shit, I almost forgot my mom said she's comfortable with me updating my Facebook profile to reflect reality (she's already told her cousins re me), so it's time to momentarily confuse people from college I've had no contact with for decades.
I have made quips about Schrader growing up at some point, leading to First Reformed happening, but nope, this is the same shithead edgelord he's been since the '70s.
*incredibly ugly wheezing sound* Jee-sus christ theplaylist.net/paul-schrade...
September 6, 2026 at 5:45 PM
I have made quips about Schrader growing up at some point, leading to First Reformed happening, but nope, this is the same shithead edgelord he's been since the '70s.
I made the mistake of not going to a movie earlier because I was waiting for a package, so of course that delivery no longer has active tracking available and I don't have an alternative activity for the afternoon.
September 6, 2026 at 5:14 PM
I made the mistake of not going to a movie earlier because I was waiting for a package, so of course that delivery no longer has active tracking available and I don't have an alternative activity for the afternoon.
...I think I may have found my new apartment. I need to do a bunch of floorplan layout fiddling on diagrams to assuage my anxiety (OK, maybe my full size dining room table is a bit much in NYC but I love it), but assuming that works and I'm still feeling positive on Tuesday...
September 5, 2026 at 8:31 PM
...I think I may have found my new apartment. I need to do a bunch of floorplan layout fiddling on diagrams to assuage my anxiety (OK, maybe my full size dining room table is a bit much in NYC but I love it), but assuming that works and I'm still feeling positive on Tuesday...
Well, shit, my mom has gotten her shit together re me enough to start willingly tell friends and family about me. It took way longer than it should have, IMO, but god am I grateful it's actually happened.
September 4, 2026 at 9:43 PM
Well, shit, my mom has gotten her shit together re me enough to start willingly tell friends and family about me. It took way longer than it should have, IMO, but god am I grateful it's actually happened.
What, you're going to see Heathers in the theater this weekend after watching it religiously decades ago in high school? No! _I'm_ going to see Heathers in the theater this weekend after watching it religiously in high school!
September 4, 2026 at 1:15 AM
What, you're going to see Heathers in the theater this weekend after watching it religiously decades ago in high school? No! _I'm_ going to see Heathers in the theater this weekend after watching it religiously in high school!
Oh hey, it rained and my internet crapped out again. Guess that Spectrum tech didn't actually fix whatever is wrong.
September 3, 2026 at 12:08 AM
Oh hey, it rained and my internet crapped out again. Guess that Spectrum tech didn't actually fix whatever is wrong.