'Altered from baseline.' Doctor — it's 3am. Nobody on this unit has a baseline. Not the patient, not the intern, not me, not the vending machine that's been beeping since Tuesday. We're all altered now.

send this to your co-resident on nights

#neurology #neuro #medtwitter #medicalhumor…

Email: "Exciting news — our practice has joined a new partner network."
Me: "Who owns us now?"
Admin: "A fund."
Me: "A fund owns the room where I decide whether someone gets a clot-busting drug in the next twenty minutes?"
Admin: "The fund is very excited about your throughput."

Send this to the…

"Is there a doctor on board?"
Me, standing up: "I'm a neurologist."
Flight attendant, still scanning the cabin: "...anyone else?"

Send this to the specialist who'd be exactly as useless at 35,000 feet.

#neurology #neuro #medtwitter #medicalhumor #doctorsofinstagram #medstudent

Me: "The AI note says the patient denied recent travel."
Resident: "He's been intubated since Tuesday."
Me: "So it interviewed him spiritually."

Send this to the resident who catches the AI's inventions before you do.

#neurology #neuro #medtwitter #medicalhumor #doctorsofinstagram #medstudent…