Matt Wirth
@cusacatofiqui.bsky.social
(he/him) I sell Blu-rays, make crosswords, play Minecraft, and think humans should be treated nicely
it's not helpful that Netflix has both a movie called Ray Gunn and a documentary about Raygun coming out in the same year
September 30, 2026 at 11:46 PM
it's not helpful that Netflix has both a movie called Ray Gunn and a documentary about Raygun coming out in the same year
"farmed potatoes while depressed"
so... it's Irish AI?
O'PenAI?
so... it's Irish AI?
O'PenAI?
September 17, 2026 at 8:38 PM
"farmed potatoes while depressed"
so... it's Irish AI?
O'PenAI?
so... it's Irish AI?
O'PenAI?
between moving Paramount and demolishing the Kennedy Center, it's a big week for billionaires making threats when they don't get their way
September 17, 2026 at 8:02 PM
between moving Paramount and demolishing the Kennedy Center, it's a big week for billionaires making threats when they don't get their way
what scene makes you emotional no matter how many times you’ve seen it?
September 16, 2026 at 10:14 PM
what scene makes you emotional no matter how many times you’ve seen it?
"your honor, those petting zoo animals at the Kiwanis pumpkin patch put a roofie in my spiced hot cider..."
Now conservatives are “victims of beastiality”. Got it.
September 15, 2026 at 10:03 PM
"your honor, those petting zoo animals at the Kiwanis pumpkin patch put a roofie in my spiced hot cider..."
Hacks losing to a show that isn't The Bear, Abbott, or Only Murders is a bit of a Pyrrhic victory, but I'll take it.
September 15, 2026 at 4:14 AM
Hacks losing to a show that isn't The Bear, Abbott, or Only Murders is a bit of a Pyrrhic victory, but I'll take it.
without saying your age, what is your favorite movie that came out when you were 20 years old?
September 2, 2026 at 4:00 AM
without saying your age, what is your favorite movie that came out when you were 20 years old?
guy listens to music at work
Make your favorite film sound as boring as possible without giving away the title:
A chief technology officer is worried about keeping his spreadsheets private.
A chief technology officer is worried about keeping his spreadsheets private.
August 29, 2026 at 12:32 AM
guy listens to music at work
August 26, 2026 at 7:16 PM
gonna start pronouncing Charli XCX like Zzyzx Road
August 26, 2026 at 3:39 AM
gonna start pronouncing Charli XCX like Zzyzx Road
honor Dolly Parton's memory by:
- supporting medical research
- giving books to kids
- threatening to shoot your boss' dick off
- supporting medical research
- giving books to kids
- threatening to shoot your boss' dick off
August 25, 2026 at 10:06 PM
honor Dolly Parton's memory by:
- supporting medical research
- giving books to kids
- threatening to shoot your boss' dick off
- supporting medical research
- giving books to kids
- threatening to shoot your boss' dick off
after living through the Clinton era, I would be both embarrassed and not surprised if Natalie Harp was who brought down Trump's presidency instead of, you know... *gestures everywhere*
August 21, 2026 at 12:59 PM
after living through the Clinton era, I would be both embarrassed and not surprised if Natalie Harp was who brought down Trump's presidency instead of, you know... *gestures everywhere*
new dream project: a live-action version of FLCL set in Gardena, CA during the Atkins diet craze
trust me, it makes SO MUCH sense in my brain...
trust me, it makes SO MUCH sense in my brain...
August 16, 2026 at 12:19 AM
new dream project: a live-action version of FLCL set in Gardena, CA during the Atkins diet craze
trust me, it makes SO MUCH sense in my brain...
trust me, it makes SO MUCH sense in my brain...
how do hard-boiled eggs get away with being the only way to eat eggs after breakfast that doesn't make you look like a weirdo? who did they pay off? is it just white privilege?
August 12, 2026 at 3:41 PM
how do hard-boiled eggs get away with being the only way to eat eggs after breakfast that doesn't make you look like a weirdo? who did they pay off? is it just white privilege?
this image, as a billboard across the state, would lead to 99.7% yes vote for the billionaire tax
If you have enough money that you can blow $100,000,000 on avoiding taxes, you have enough money to pay $100,000,000 *on* taxes that will help your fellow citizens, you self-centered prick.
August 11, 2026 at 9:53 PM
this image, as a billboard across the state, would lead to 99.7% yes vote for the billionaire tax
Trump is the kind of asshole who would pull an Iron Man 3-style "I'm at the White House; come get me, fuckers!" then hide under a folding table at Mar-a-Lago until they removed the last staffers' bodies from the impact crater on Pennsylvania Ave.
August 11, 2026 at 2:27 AM
Trump is the kind of asshole who would pull an Iron Man 3-style "I'm at the White House; come get me, fuckers!" then hide under a folding table at Mar-a-Lago until they removed the last staffers' bodies from the impact crater on Pennsylvania Ave.
got my fifth crossword published to the Sporcle front page...
August 9, 2026 at 4:25 AM
got my fifth crossword published to the Sporcle front page...
me: "if they rebooted Cash Cab, they would have to call it Uber-Genius"
wife: "or I Know Waymo Than You"
we're a modern-day Stiller and Meara.
wife: "or I Know Waymo Than You"
we're a modern-day Stiller and Meara.
August 8, 2026 at 3:19 PM
me: "if they rebooted Cash Cab, they would have to call it Uber-Genius"
wife: "or I Know Waymo Than You"
we're a modern-day Stiller and Meara.
wife: "or I Know Waymo Than You"
we're a modern-day Stiller and Meara.
not to be a Southwestern elitist, but honestly how good could the Punisher's chili be in Brand New Day if that stuff's made in...
August 6, 2026 at 6:22 PM
not to be a Southwestern elitist, but honestly how good could the Punisher's chili be in Brand New Day if that stuff's made in...