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eclectrica.bsky.social
koyaanisgoatse
@eclectrica.bsky.social
110 followers 180 following 62 posts
Hapsburg face and an Oakland booty.
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dumbmike.bsky.social
I thought this was just beautiful. Kurt Vonnegut takes a walk to mail a letter:
She calls out, “Where are you going?” And I say, “I am going out to get an envelope.” And she says, “Well, you’re not a poor man. Why don’t you buy a thousand envelopes? They’ll deliver them, and you can put them in a closet.” And I say, “Hush.” I go next to the postal convenience center down the block at the corner of 47th Street and Second Avenue. The woman behind the counter says, “Thirty-nine cents for a stamp.” I say, “I only brought thirty-seven. When did that change?” She looked at me a long time. “Thirty-seven isn’t enough.” “Well that oughta be enough for one envelope,” I said. The line was getting longer. The lady moved her hand into her coat. I knew this routine. I backflipped behind the man behind me in line, wrapping my elbow around his throat as I landed. By the time the stamp seller had unloaded her clip, I had full cover. The gentleman’s body dropped to the floor, six holes smoking. The package he was carrying fell to the floor with a heavy clunk. Whatever was in there, it would do. I rolled my foot over the cardboard and did a “flick up” as they call it in soccer. I bounced the package once or twice on the back of my foot as the mail lady reloaded, then I launched it high and spun 360 to deliver my patented “Rising Phoenix kick”. The package caught fire as it shattered through the protective plexiglass window and struck the woman’s head with all the force and hatred I had learned to channel in my grueling tutelage under five fallen Wudang masters in my youth. The lady’s body exploded off of her bones, leaving just a blackened skeleton spinning in her office chair. “So it goes,” I said, but no one laughed. I guess they weren’t big readers. And I go home. And I have had one hell of a good time. We are dancing animals. How beautiful it is to get up and go out and do something. We are here on Earth to fart around. Don’t let anybody tell you any different.
September 24, 2026 at 10:15 PM
Reposted by koyaanisgoatse
sexdracula.rocks
the "don't bring iced coffee to an interview" discourse is great bc it's such a succinct and clarifying example of how private businesses aren't efficient & logical enterprises, they're just arbitrary in-groups ruled by sociopaths, power tripping on their ability to enforce pointless bullshit norms
September 25, 2026 at 6:09 PM
Reposted by koyaanisgoatse
tedcruznipples.com
Some of those that work forces

Are the same that fuck horses
September 10, 2026 at 6:58 PM
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backingtrack.gg
Maybe technology was a mistake.
August 28, 2026 at 10:58 PM
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suchmayer.northsky.social
There are so many donations happening right now that the site has crashed.
azalben.bsky.social Alex Zalben @azalben.bsky.social · Aug 25
Here's the official announcement of Parton's passing from her reps, along with the request that in lieu of flowers, the family asks for donations to be made to Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library at www.imaginationlibrary.com
August 25, 2026 at 6:30 PM
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annabookwriter.bsky.social
I have to be so honest: every time someone says Butlerian jihad, I imagine Judith Butler tearing the RAM out of a computer with her bare hands
lookitup.baby Ian Coldwater 🧊🚫 @lookitup.baby · Aug 22
BUTLERIAN JIHAD NOW
LIVE BREAKING NEWS JUDITH BUTLER BEGINS HOLY WAR QUOTED AS SAYING "THE AGE OF THINKING MACHINES IS AT AN END"
August 22, 2026 at 2:53 PM
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mykafuiohkafui.bsky.social
Listen, you can date a bunch of 1s and 0s without having an AI boyfriend.
August 13, 2026 at 3:11 AM
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rob-reiner-fan.bsky.social
Make your own interpretation.
August 5, 2026 at 8:21 PM
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hotshotrobot.bsky.social
Meanwhile, in New York:
A photo of Zohran Mamdani looking nonchalant as the caption explains: "As of March 20, 66,000 HOLES FILLED"
August 6, 2026 at 2:22 PM
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csketch.bsky.social
Oh my god I think I found the video.
August 4, 2026 at 6:53 PM
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girinathan.bsky.social
we might be throwing out a generational umami opportunity. i will taste the forbidden fish sauce defector.com/abandoned-fi...
Let Me And A Food Scientist Sample The Abandoned Fish Sauce Terrorizing A Small Canadian Town | Defector
Take capelin, a small silvery fish in the smelt family. Now add salt. Then throw those two ingredients in 110 vats, each of them about 10 feet tall, and let them sit in a defunct factory for over two ...
defector.com
July 30, 2026 at 5:18 PM
Reposted by koyaanisgoatse
scsheil.bsky.social
Currently reorganising my paperbacks and came across my TNT collection - aka the wildest, most ridiculous and over-the-top men’s adventure series ever published. Let the synopses give you a taste of what’s inside:
A series of seven paperback books, all with black covers, all with varying illustration of the same man’s face - holding a gun, a knife, a hook etc. He is extraordinarily chiselled and rugged. Anthony Nicholas Twin vs. The Black Widow Six of the richest men in the world. All dead. All had been married to the same mysterious woman. A woman so elegant, so deeply sensual, no man could resist her. No man, except of course, TNT. But when the deadly seductress traps TNT on a mirrored bed suspended from a helicopter high over the Empire State Building-the man with the uncanny sexual prowess has to make a crucial decision-become the black widow's new mate or end up as a grease spot on Fifth Avenue... TNT It begins beyond anything you have ever experienced before. Meet Anthony Nicholas Twin. He goes all the way. And then keeps going. In the wilds of Paraguay is hidden a legendary city of sex and gold. For centuries its citizens have lived in peace. But now the fanatical Torquemada is stealing their treasure to finance his scheme to become the worldwide Napoleon of Terrorism. TNT's choice: infiltrate Torquemada's fascist killer corps by surviving their incredible suicide training. Or watch the only human he loves, sweet innocent October, subjected to the most hideous torture ever dreamed of by animal or man! TNT It begins beyond anything you have ever experienced before. Anthony Nicholas Twin in a battle for blood Eleven people. All with the same rare blood type. All dead. Butchered and bled by international terrorists. One woman. The only possible donor left in the world. Frozen-her body rests in a secret cryogenic laboratory in Hungary. TNT is about to enter a living, breathing hell of staggering proportions. A Kingdom of Death-where blood runs cold and hearts cease to beat at the push of a button. It is a nightmare world that leaves TNT only two choices-kill with razor-edged precision...or end up as a human popsicle... TNT It begins beyond anything you have ever experienced before.
July 30, 2026 at 8:58 PM
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clairewillett.bsky.social
I’m wheezing

smittenkitchen.com/2026/07/spag...
Spaghetti Aglio e Olio SERVINGS: THIS IS A PRIVATE MATTER TIME: 20 MINUTES SOURCE: SMITTEN KITCHEN
July 28, 2026 at 11:32 PM
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mckelvie.bsky.social
Plums In The Icebox, coming from Denis Villeneuve in 2028
jessehawken.bsky.social Jesse Hawken @jessehawken.bsky.social · Jul 28
Studio execs are going to want to adapt more poems for the big screen now
July 28, 2026 at 4:00 PM
Reposted by koyaanisgoatse
richycraven.bsky.social
Spielberg: We need you to authentically display the emotion and sheer awe of seeing a dinosaur in real life.

Sam Neil: Righto, I'm going to do all that *and* palm Laura Dern's head like a basketball. Fetch my sexy little neckerchief.
July 13, 2026 at 7:34 AM
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jblainefoster.bsky.social
need you all to see this deeply indescribable cooking video
July 9, 2026 at 1:20 AM
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jordamusprime.bsky.social
Earlier today I heard someone say that they're going to stick Mitch McConnell's brain into John Fetterman's body like Krang and I have no self control
July 3, 2026 at 10:50 PM
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mattdelong.bsky.social
Simpsons meme with Hans Moleman on a pay phone saying “I need the biggest metaphor you have.” Followed by “No, that’s too big.”
July 5, 2026 at 2:14 AM
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jowiph.bsky.social
I would kill or die for Larry
A small operation in Oregon that hunts truffles with a trained dog has added an unpaid trainee. A cat named Larry accompanies the handler and the truffle dog into the woods every outing, works a patch of ground a little apart from them, and digs with tremendous confidence in places where there is nothing. The handler says Larry has never found a truffle and shows no sign of understanding the assignment. He does not use scent the way the dog does and he does not respond when the dog makes a find. He simply digs his own holes nearby and then inspects them. "He thinks he's on the team," the handler said. "He is emphatically not on the team." TRUFFLE DOG FINDS THE TRUFFLES - 'TRAINEE' CAT DIGS RANDOM HOLES AND FINDS DIRT
July 3, 2026 at 10:50 PM
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sireviscerate.myatproto.social
"take the shot," i whisper into my sleeve

inside my sleeve, a mouse pounds a little glass of tequila
July 1, 2026 at 8:14 PM
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zoewithasword.bsky.social
Bex sent me this shirt saying "you need this more than anything" and that's romance
Shirt that says She calls me Anthony Bourdain because I eat her parts unknown, no reservations
June 27, 2026 at 4:50 PM
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andrewcfrancis.bsky.social
Happy #PrideMonth! Enjoy a Tesla getting smashed by a light rail train with a pride flag.
Blue Tesla with a smashed front end next to a Baltimore City light rail car painted with the pride flag.
June 26, 2026 at 6:07 PM