Reposted by gg
I love to be arrogant and opinionated
September 4, 2026 at 11:07 PM
I love to be arrogant and opinionated
My kid just asked what happens if you wear white to a funeral and I told her then you die too
September 4, 2026 at 11:39 PM
My kid just asked what happens if you wear white to a funeral and I told her then you die too
Reposted by gg
Who shot J.R.
What's the first historic event that you remember?
August 26, 2026 at 5:59 AM
Who shot J.R.
Reposted by gg
I’m praying for you and no one else
August 26, 2026 at 2:36 AM
I’m praying for you and no one else
Reposted by gg
Fucked that there are a million songs about love but only one about baking me a cake as fast as you can
July 13, 2026 at 11:38 PM
Fucked that there are a million songs about love but only one about baking me a cake as fast as you can
*opens a bill* This is why that hot italian boy killed that guy
August 20, 2026 at 1:37 AM
*opens a bill* This is why that hot italian boy killed that guy
Reposted by gg
(at the museum) can i have this
June 14, 2023 at 1:43 AM
(at the museum) can i have this
Getting struck by lighting probably isn’t even that bad unless you don’t die
August 17, 2026 at 1:49 AM
Getting struck by lighting probably isn’t even that bad unless you don’t die
Reposted by gg
Walked into the bathroom and Johnny Cash's "Amazing Grace" is playing and now I'm crying and pissing
July 8, 2026 at 8:46 PM
Walked into the bathroom and Johnny Cash's "Amazing Grace" is playing and now I'm crying and pissing
I don’t mind spiders I just don’t want them in my house doing that in front of my kids
July 8, 2026 at 9:01 PM
I don’t mind spiders I just don’t want them in my house doing that in front of my kids
Reposted by gg
You, 6ft tall, full head of hair: i cant get into these crevices im too big and they snag my hair.
Me, 5'6 and bald, emerging from a crevice: yeah I wouldn't know, man
Me, 5'6 and bald, emerging from a crevice: yeah I wouldn't know, man
June 5, 2023 at 3:55 AM
You, 6ft tall, full head of hair: i cant get into these crevices im too big and they snag my hair.
Me, 5'6 and bald, emerging from a crevice: yeah I wouldn't know, man
Me, 5'6 and bald, emerging from a crevice: yeah I wouldn't know, man
Reposted by gg
Reposted by gg
Got kicked out of the liberry again cuz a couple people complained about my therapy goose Insane Willie.
October 22, 2023 at 2:13 PM
Got kicked out of the liberry again cuz a couple people complained about my therapy goose Insane Willie.
Reposted by gg
most shockingly of all, the alien craft was reportedly adorned with a sort of bumper sticker that said "Earth Hoes Cant Fuck"
February 28, 2026 at 1:53 AM
most shockingly of all, the alien craft was reportedly adorned with a sort of bumper sticker that said "Earth Hoes Cant Fuck"
Reposted by gg
Bert and Ernie should have their own show. I don't want to have to watch Sesame Street to see what they're up to. I'm not 5
May 3, 2026 at 3:13 PM
Bert and Ernie should have their own show. I don't want to have to watch Sesame Street to see what they're up to. I'm not 5
Reposted by gg
*Eying my uncle's new toilet jealously* yeah its nice and everything, just hope its not too much bowl for ya, is all
June 11, 2023 at 9:59 PM
*Eying my uncle's new toilet jealously* yeah its nice and everything, just hope its not too much bowl for ya, is all
Imagine your mom saying the best five minutes of her life was Eminem’s 2000 VMA performance, now you know how my kids feel
May 10, 2026 at 2:38 AM
Imagine your mom saying the best five minutes of her life was Eminem’s 2000 VMA performance, now you know how my kids feel
Reposted by gg
Bad news everyone, people are going to keep trying to kill me unless you build me a ballroom
April 26, 2026 at 12:23 PM
Bad news everyone, people are going to keep trying to kill me unless you build me a ballroom
Reposted by gg
i’m listening to fugazi and eating a bowl of cereal - i can’t believe i’ve never done this before!
April 27, 2026 at 12:12 AM
i’m listening to fugazi and eating a bowl of cereal - i can’t believe i’ve never done this before!
Reposted by gg
Wiser words have never rang truer...
everything will kill you, my friend, might as well get a mcRib
April 26, 2026 at 11:24 PM
Wiser words have never rang truer...
Reposted by gg
I don't understand the problem people have with candy cigarettes. They were a great way to practice before I started smoking.
April 25, 2026 at 5:16 PM
I don't understand the problem people have with candy cigarettes. They were a great way to practice before I started smoking.
I made this for my friend who is having a routine colonoscopy tomorrow
April 21, 2026 at 12:42 AM
I made this for my friend who is having a routine colonoscopy tomorrow
Reposted by gg
Standing in the yard with my mouth open and drinking 2L of rainwater right from the sky. Took about 1hr 45min
April 20, 2026 at 5:11 AM
Standing in the yard with my mouth open and drinking 2L of rainwater right from the sky. Took about 1hr 45min