Haiku Alibi
@haiku-alibi.bsky.social
Goddamn radical lefty humanist, as is only reasonable.
We only get a short ride on the rock. Look out for each other.
We only get a short ride on the rock. Look out for each other.
Rapist Uses Power to Violate Woman Who Dared to Fight Back
There are exactly zero other valid interpretations.
And NYT is fucking holding the dildo with this down the middle headline. There is no middle.
Fucking cowards and traitors to their stated profession.
There are exactly zero other valid interpretations.
And NYT is fucking holding the dildo with this down the middle headline. There is no middle.
Fucking cowards and traitors to their stated profession.
Justice Dept. Is Said to Open Criminal Inquiry of E. Jean Carroll, Who Accused Trump of Rape
Ms. Carroll, who prevailed in a civil trial after accusing President Trump of sexual abuse, is the latest target in a Justice Department campaign going after his perceived enemies.
www.nytimes.com
May 28, 2026 at 4:11 AM
Rapist Uses Power to Violate Woman Who Dared to Fight Back
There are exactly zero other valid interpretations.
And NYT is fucking holding the dildo with this down the middle headline. There is no middle.
Fucking cowards and traitors to their stated profession.
There are exactly zero other valid interpretations.
And NYT is fucking holding the dildo with this down the middle headline. There is no middle.
Fucking cowards and traitors to their stated profession.
This crystallizes the driving force behind the corrupt SC majority. They aren't pro-MAGA, they are anti-democracy. Weakening enfranchisement and institutions at the behest of their "sponsors" to grease the transition to neo-feudalism.
November is coming.
www.nytimes.com/live/2026/04...
November is coming.
www.nytimes.com/live/2026/04...
April 29, 2026 at 11:27 PM
This crystallizes the driving force behind the corrupt SC majority. They aren't pro-MAGA, they are anti-democracy. Weakening enfranchisement and institutions at the behest of their "sponsors" to grease the transition to neo-feudalism.
November is coming.
www.nytimes.com/live/2026/04...
November is coming.
www.nytimes.com/live/2026/04...
Altman and Musk scrumming over who gets to be the bigger douchebag.
A pox on both their houses.
www.nytimes.com/2026/04/28/t...
A pox on both their houses.
www.nytimes.com/2026/04/28/t...
April 29, 2026 at 12:06 AM
Altman and Musk scrumming over who gets to be the bigger douchebag.
A pox on both their houses.
www.nytimes.com/2026/04/28/t...
A pox on both their houses.
www.nytimes.com/2026/04/28/t...
My eyelids are doing the WTF flutter so hard I'm going to pull a hamstring.
Where do you even start with something like this?
November is coming.
Where do you even start with something like this?
November is coming.
Vance Says Pope Leo Should Be More Careful When Talking About Theology
The vice president, who is Catholic, took issue with Pope Leo XIV’s statement that disciples of Christ are “never on the side of those who once wielded the sword and today drop bombs.”
www.nytimes.com
April 15, 2026 at 3:41 AM
My eyelids are doing the WTF flutter so hard I'm going to pull a hamstring.
Where do you even start with something like this?
November is coming.
Where do you even start with something like this?
November is coming.
These clowns couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel, but we have to go to extraordinary lengths to combat their continuous, casual, abusive stupidity.
The First Amendment is a thing.
The Epstein files won't go away.
November is coming.
The First Amendment is a thing.
The Epstein files won't go away.
November is coming.
Judge Rejects Hegseth’s Second Attempt to Restrict Reporters at Pentagon
A federal judge gutted a set of rules that were adopted after the court declared an earlier press policy unconstitutional, in a case brought by The New York Times.
www.nytimes.com
April 10, 2026 at 4:15 AM
These clowns couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel, but we have to go to extraordinary lengths to combat their continuous, casual, abusive stupidity.
The First Amendment is a thing.
The Epstein files won't go away.
November is coming.
The First Amendment is a thing.
The Epstein files won't go away.
November is coming.
What the hell are they going to do? Send SEAL Team 6 on a Popenapping?
It's like these fucksticks never met a stupid idea they didn't like.
The Epstein files are still waiting.
November is coming.
It's like these fucksticks never met a stupid idea they didn't like.
The Epstein files are still waiting.
November is coming.
Pentagon Threatened the Pope After He Criticized Trump
It was so bad that Pope Leo changed his plans to travel to the U.S.
newrepublic.com
April 9, 2026 at 6:11 AM
What the hell are they going to do? Send SEAL Team 6 on a Popenapping?
It's like these fucksticks never met a stupid idea they didn't like.
The Epstein files are still waiting.
November is coming.
It's like these fucksticks never met a stupid idea they didn't like.
The Epstein files are still waiting.
November is coming.
Dumpster Don didn't know you can't step out of your kiddie pool, take a massive shit on your neighbor's slip-n-slide and go back to your wallowing in peace. Said neighbor will accost you with a garden implement, and there's no ignoring their outrage because you're bored and have moved on.
April 6, 2026 at 11:11 PM
Dumpster Don didn't know you can't step out of your kiddie pool, take a massive shit on your neighbor's slip-n-slide and go back to your wallowing in peace. Said neighbor will accost you with a garden implement, and there's no ignoring their outrage because you're bored and have moved on.
The official Jesus team boosters say your cheers suck, Kegsbreath.
Take your moldy pom-poms and go home.
November is coming.
Take your moldy pom-poms and go home.
November is coming.
Hegseth Says U.S. Troops Are Fighting for Jesus. The Pope Disagrees.
In sharp contrast to the Trump administration’s calls for Christian prayers for the war effort, Pope Leo XIV says military domination is “entirely foreign to the way of Jesus Christ.”
www.nytimes.com
April 4, 2026 at 4:04 AM
The official Jesus team boosters say your cheers suck, Kegsbreath.
Take your moldy pom-poms and go home.
November is coming.
Take your moldy pom-poms and go home.
November is coming.
@scoundrel2.bsky.social
My dollar was also on the "knows too much to be fired" square.
Theirs was on "she'll never talk because her knowledge is so guilty she'd end up in the cell next to his".
These chuds are getting fired for failing to please Shitler, not for being awful.
November is coming.
My dollar was also on the "knows too much to be fired" square.
Theirs was on "she'll never talk because her knowledge is so guilty she'd end up in the cell next to his".
These chuds are getting fired for failing to please Shitler, not for being awful.
November is coming.
Trump Administration Live Updates: Bondi Fired as Attorney General
www.nytimes.com
April 2, 2026 at 6:59 PM
@scoundrel2.bsky.social
My dollar was also on the "knows too much to be fired" square.
Theirs was on "she'll never talk because her knowledge is so guilty she'd end up in the cell next to his".
These chuds are getting fired for failing to please Shitler, not for being awful.
November is coming.
My dollar was also on the "knows too much to be fired" square.
Theirs was on "she'll never talk because her knowledge is so guilty she'd end up in the cell next to his".
These chuds are getting fired for failing to please Shitler, not for being awful.
November is coming.
Where to even start?
* Protecting a guilty pedophile and satisfying calls for transparency are mutually incompatible goals
* Oh, right, she's a sociopath who works for a pedophile who's going to bus-toss her? 🎻
November is coming.
* Protecting a guilty pedophile and satisfying calls for transparency are mutually incompatible goals
* Oh, right, she's a sociopath who works for a pedophile who's going to bus-toss her? 🎻
November is coming.
How Pam Bondi’s Missteps on the Epstein Files Jeopardized Her Job
www.nytimes.com
April 1, 2026 at 11:28 PM
Where to even start?
* Protecting a guilty pedophile and satisfying calls for transparency are mutually incompatible goals
* Oh, right, she's a sociopath who works for a pedophile who's going to bus-toss her? 🎻
November is coming.
* Protecting a guilty pedophile and satisfying calls for transparency are mutually incompatible goals
* Oh, right, she's a sociopath who works for a pedophile who's going to bus-toss her? 🎻
November is coming.
Oh, look, actual journalism.
Can you even call it regulatory capture when the regulator runs toward industry with open arms, tongue extended?
November is coming.
Can you even call it regulatory capture when the regulator runs toward industry with open arms, tongue extended?
November is coming.
From Foe to Ally: The S.E.C. Is Now Writing Crypto-Friendly Policies
The embrace of crypto by financial regulators under President Trump has entered a new, cozier phase.
www.nytimes.com
March 30, 2026 at 6:02 PM
Oh, look, actual journalism.
Can you even call it regulatory capture when the regulator runs toward industry with open arms, tongue extended?
November is coming.
Can you even call it regulatory capture when the regulator runs toward industry with open arms, tongue extended?
November is coming.
Controlling internal travel is a key requirement for maintaining fascist control.
November is coming.
November is coming.
ICE May Remain at Airports Even After T.S.A. Pay Resumes, Border Czar Says
Transportation safety officers are set to be paid on Monday, but Tom Homan, the White House’s border czar, said ICE agents may stay where there are shortages.
www.nytimes.com
March 29, 2026 at 7:56 PM
Controlling internal travel is a key requirement for maintaining fascist control.
November is coming.
November is coming.
"Allegations".
Bigot is as bigot does.
November is coming.
Bigot is as bigot does.
November is coming.
March 27, 2026 at 3:52 PM
"Allegations".
Bigot is as bigot does.
November is coming.
Bigot is as bigot does.
November is coming.
Stationing goons people are used to seeing armed and masked in airports? Sure, why not?
Henchmen uniforms that hide faces is only a trope for gaping security holes in fiction.
Good thing there's no countries mad at us for some weird reason who might like to exploit that.
November is coming.
Henchmen uniforms that hide faces is only a trope for gaping security holes in fiction.
Good thing there's no countries mad at us for some weird reason who might like to exploit that.
November is coming.
Live updates: ICE agents deployed to airports as TSA wait times grow | CNN
Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents are heading to 13 airports today to help with crowd management as travelers at some airports wait in hours-long security lines amid the DHS shutdown. Follow ...
www.cnn.com
March 23, 2026 at 8:15 PM
Stationing goons people are used to seeing armed and masked in airports? Sure, why not?
Henchmen uniforms that hide faces is only a trope for gaping security holes in fiction.
Good thing there's no countries mad at us for some weird reason who might like to exploit that.
November is coming.
Henchmen uniforms that hide faces is only a trope for gaping security holes in fiction.
Good thing there's no countries mad at us for some weird reason who might like to exploit that.
November is coming.
So the Islamic State isn't bad in *principle*, only in *specifics*.
Got it.
November is coming.
Got it.
November is coming.
March 20, 2026 at 11:34 PM
So the Islamic State isn't bad in *principle*, only in *specifics*.
Got it.
November is coming.
Got it.
November is coming.
Nazis eat their own.
When it cracks, the whole structure will come unglued as they rush to turn on each other. 🍿
November is coming.
When it cracks, the whole structure will come unglued as they rush to turn on each other. 🍿
November is coming.
Joe Kent: Former counter-terrorism head under FBI investigation over alleged leaks
The former counter-terrorism head resigned on Tuesday over the war with Iran, saying the country posed "no imminent threat" to the US.
www.bbc.com
March 20, 2026 at 12:24 AM
Nazis eat their own.
When it cracks, the whole structure will come unglued as they rush to turn on each other. 🍿
November is coming.
When it cracks, the whole structure will come unglued as they rush to turn on each other. 🍿
November is coming.
Only Dear Leader knows the truth.
November. November. November.
November. November. November.
March 19, 2026 at 4:29 AM
Only Dear Leader knows the truth.
November. November. November.
November. November. November.
Called this back in January. ICE operational budget will be the last thing to suffer in the DHS shutdown, regardless of what it takes. They'll shut down JFK, LaGuardia, and SFO before letting the brown shirts feel the pinch.
Be sure to give Schumer a Bronx cheer next time you see him.
November...
Be sure to give Schumer a Bronx cheer next time you see him.
November...
Some small US airports may have to shut due to TSA absences, official says
Some small U.S. airports may have to shut due to a shortage of security screeners if a government funding impasse continues, a senior Trump administration official said on Tuesday.
www.reuters.com
March 17, 2026 at 11:40 PM
Called this back in January. ICE operational budget will be the last thing to suffer in the DHS shutdown, regardless of what it takes. They'll shut down JFK, LaGuardia, and SFO before letting the brown shirts feel the pinch.
Be sure to give Schumer a Bronx cheer next time you see him.
November...
Be sure to give Schumer a Bronx cheer next time you see him.
November...
"Begs", BBC, the verb is "begs".
The Trumpstein Files are still a thing. November is coming.
The Trumpstein Files are still a thing. November is coming.
Trump urges UK and others to send ships to help secure Strait of Hormuz after Iranian attacks - live updates
Meanwhile, Israel says Iran has launched a sixth wave of strikes on Saturday and in Kuwait, an air base has been hit by two drones.
www.bbc.com
March 14, 2026 at 8:14 PM
"Begs", BBC, the verb is "begs".
The Trumpstein Files are still a thing. November is coming.
The Trumpstein Files are still a thing. November is coming.
"...but I'm helping Putin a lot. Because I'm the bigliest traitor in the highliest office ever. No one can trait like me. I'm just the best."
November, November, November.
November, November, November.
Trump says Putin may be helping Iran 'a bit' as war continues
In an interview, Trump acknowledged that the US is also helping Ukraine's government fight Russia.
www.bbc.com
March 13, 2026 at 6:37 PM
"...but I'm helping Putin a lot. Because I'm the bigliest traitor in the highliest office ever. No one can trait like me. I'm just the best."
November, November, November.
November, November, November.
They surged despite promises from the US?
It's... it's almost like they don't trust the US government! How could this possibly be?
It's... it's almost like they don't trust the US government! How could this possibly be?
![NYT:
Iran War Live Updates: Oil Tops $100 a Barrel as Attacks Spread Across Middle East
[[Global oil prices surged despite pledges from the United States and other countries to release reserves]]. Airstrikes shook Beirut and Tehran, and more ships were attacked in the Persian Gulf.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:sd5uwjwo2kdpsf4qsenukhwq/bafkreib5ln4cag5tnqm4oehsw2fktsneyxxlw3p7drqlwjhyrht4pte3li)
March 12, 2026 at 6:04 AM
They surged despite promises from the US?
It's... it's almost like they don't trust the US government! How could this possibly be?
It's... it's almost like they don't trust the US government! How could this possibly be?
Long article, worth the read.
This ain't going away.
This ain't going away.
Epstein had two key aides - why do they still control his money and secrets?
Richard Kahn and Darren Indyke administer Epstein’s estate - court filings allege complicity in his crimes.
www.bbc.com
March 11, 2026 at 11:55 PM
Long article, worth the read.
This ain't going away.
This ain't going away.
I don't even know where to start here.
Miscalculated implies any calculation at all, which ain't what happened.
They just started 💩💩ing munitions and hoped for an outcome aligned with their aims.
Spoiler alert: it wasn't freedom, justice, or a 1/2 price Happy Meal
November is coming.
Miscalculated implies any calculation at all, which ain't what happened.
They just started 💩💩ing munitions and hoped for an outcome aligned with their aims.
Spoiler alert: it wasn't freedom, justice, or a 1/2 price Happy Meal
November is coming.
March 11, 2026 at 10:34 PM
I don't even know where to start here.
Miscalculated implies any calculation at all, which ain't what happened.
They just started 💩💩ing munitions and hoped for an outcome aligned with their aims.
Spoiler alert: it wasn't freedom, justice, or a 1/2 price Happy Meal
November is coming.
Miscalculated implies any calculation at all, which ain't what happened.
They just started 💩💩ing munitions and hoped for an outcome aligned with their aims.
Spoiler alert: it wasn't freedom, justice, or a 1/2 price Happy Meal
November is coming.
Remember this? When Schumer and Dem Senate leadership had the leverage to demand real changes on the ground and then pissed it away?
I wonder if we'd be in the middle of an illegal shit show of a war right now if those Vichy Senators had actually held the fucking line.
I wonder if we'd be in the middle of an illegal shit show of a war right now if those Vichy Senators had actually held the fucking line.
Senate passes $1.2T government funding deal — but a brief shutdown is certain
With the House not voting until Monday, the Pentagon and most domestic agencies are set to shutter briefly.
www.politico.com
March 10, 2026 at 9:55 AM
Remember this? When Schumer and Dem Senate leadership had the leverage to demand real changes on the ground and then pissed it away?
I wonder if we'd be in the middle of an illegal shit show of a war right now if those Vichy Senators had actually held the fucking line.
I wonder if we'd be in the middle of an illegal shit show of a war right now if those Vichy Senators had actually held the fucking line.
The "lalalala everything is normal" crew are writing the war news.
Quoting incoherent, data-free babble and covering it as if it were an acceptable statement of unremarkable quality is collaboration.
It is already a hard year and will get harder, but this is the year we topple the regime.
Quoting incoherent, data-free babble and covering it as if it were an acceptable statement of unremarkable quality is collaboration.
It is already a hard year and will get harder, but this is the year we topple the regime.
March 9, 2026 at 9:29 PM
The "lalalala everything is normal" crew are writing the war news.
Quoting incoherent, data-free babble and covering it as if it were an acceptable statement of unremarkable quality is collaboration.
It is already a hard year and will get harder, but this is the year we topple the regime.
Quoting incoherent, data-free babble and covering it as if it were an acceptable statement of unremarkable quality is collaboration.
It is already a hard year and will get harder, but this is the year we topple the regime.