Joe & Gogu
@joereiner.bsky.social
Crime novelist.
Short observations, odd memories, and occasional advice from a raccoon.
Cut from the Will and Willing to Kill. Next one out soon.
Short observations, odd memories, and occasional advice from a raccoon.
Cut from the Will and Willing to Kill. Next one out soon.
Pinned
Man’s life has three phases and they proceed in order: fiction, nonfiction, and reference. — Gogu.
Actually I came up with that line about 20 years ago, but I’m letting the raccoon take credit.
Actually I came up with that line about 20 years ago, but I’m letting the raccoon take credit.
One time in high school I described a friend as having taken so much acid that his chromosomes looked like paisleys.
Dad didn't believe I'd made up the line.
Dad didn't believe I'd made up the line.
September 16, 2026 at 6:47 PM
One time in high school I described a friend as having taken so much acid that his chromosomes looked like paisleys.
Dad didn't believe I'd made up the line.
Dad didn't believe I'd made up the line.
An acquaintance once told me, “You seem like a guy who’s figured out that women are too much trouble.”
He gave me a look.
“Some people are too smart for their own good.”
He gave me a look.
“Some people are too smart for their own good.”
September 14, 2026 at 7:35 PM
An acquaintance once told me, “You seem like a guy who’s figured out that women are too much trouble.”
He gave me a look.
“Some people are too smart for their own good.”
He gave me a look.
“Some people are too smart for their own good.”
Couple of articles about raccoons this past year. One found drunk in a bathroom, another smoking crack or something.
I’m thinking of pulling a stunt like that. Get my name in the goddamn papers.
I’m thinking of pulling a stunt like that. Get my name in the goddamn papers.
September 12, 2026 at 2:36 AM
Couple of articles about raccoons this past year. One found drunk in a bathroom, another smoking crack or something.
I’m thinking of pulling a stunt like that. Get my name in the goddamn papers.
I’m thinking of pulling a stunt like that. Get my name in the goddamn papers.
Puget Sound beach walk. Tide falling. Crow perched on the ruins of a sand castle.
Some kid learned about life.
Some kid learned about life.
September 9, 2026 at 6:02 PM
Puget Sound beach walk. Tide falling. Crow perched on the ruins of a sand castle.
Some kid learned about life.
Some kid learned about life.
Sometime during college I started a mock epic called Ballad of a Hippy.
I was born at a Rainbow Gathering,
Jupiter was aligned with Mars,
My mama saved the afterbirth,
And put it up in jars.
I was born at a Rainbow Gathering,
Jupiter was aligned with Mars,
My mama saved the afterbirth,
And put it up in jars.
September 7, 2026 at 6:35 PM
Sometime during college I started a mock epic called Ballad of a Hippy.
I was born at a Rainbow Gathering,
Jupiter was aligned with Mars,
My mama saved the afterbirth,
And put it up in jars.
I was born at a Rainbow Gathering,
Jupiter was aligned with Mars,
My mama saved the afterbirth,
And put it up in jars.
Clarke and I used to work on sailboats down at a marina on the Sound. Sanding and varnishing teak on our knees or butts.
One day wanting the knee pads, I pointed and said, “Toss me those French love boots.”
One day wanting the knee pads, I pointed and said, “Toss me those French love boots.”
September 4, 2026 at 7:00 PM
Clarke and I used to work on sailboats down at a marina on the Sound. Sanding and varnishing teak on our knees or butts.
One day wanting the knee pads, I pointed and said, “Toss me those French love boots.”
One day wanting the knee pads, I pointed and said, “Toss me those French love boots.”
Sometimes I have a poop so admirably formed—a bit of character at the head end and not tailing off wispily—that it seems sad to flush it.
You know what I mean?
You know what I mean?
September 2, 2026 at 7:21 PM
Sometimes I have a poop so admirably formed—a bit of character at the head end and not tailing off wispily—that it seems sad to flush it.
You know what I mean?
You know what I mean?
Thousands of Jimothy rookie cards were handed out at a Mariners game. Including one stupid “gold card.” Some girl just sold hers on eBay for $21,000.
Insane! I used to babysit Jimothy. Cute kid, but inside he’s nothing special. I’m 10x wiser—where’s my damn card? — Gogu
Insane! I used to babysit Jimothy. Cute kid, but inside he’s nothing special. I’m 10x wiser—where’s my damn card? — Gogu
August 31, 2026 at 6:47 PM
Thousands of Jimothy rookie cards were handed out at a Mariners game. Including one stupid “gold card.” Some girl just sold hers on eBay for $21,000.
Insane! I used to babysit Jimothy. Cute kid, but inside he’s nothing special. I’m 10x wiser—where’s my damn card? — Gogu
Insane! I used to babysit Jimothy. Cute kid, but inside he’s nothing special. I’m 10x wiser—where’s my damn card? — Gogu
Man’s life has three phases and they proceed in order: fiction, nonfiction, and reference. — Gogu.
Actually I came up with that line about 20 years ago, but I’m letting the raccoon take credit.
Actually I came up with that line about 20 years ago, but I’m letting the raccoon take credit.
August 28, 2026 at 8:14 PM
Man’s life has three phases and they proceed in order: fiction, nonfiction, and reference. — Gogu.
Actually I came up with that line about 20 years ago, but I’m letting the raccoon take credit.
Actually I came up with that line about 20 years ago, but I’m letting the raccoon take credit.
Ol’ Split Oar says, “We get folks at the lodge kinked dollar-sign shaped. It takes days for them to straighten out. That’s why we strongly recommend at least a one-week stay.”
August 28, 2026 at 7:38 PM
Ol’ Split Oar says, “We get folks at the lodge kinked dollar-sign shaped. It takes days for them to straighten out. That’s why we strongly recommend at least a one-week stay.”
At the heart of almost every successful business is a crime—Gogu
August 28, 2026 at 1:16 AM
At the heart of almost every successful business is a crime—Gogu
Knew a woman who kept two giant snakes on bunk beds in the basement. One day, the upper bunk snake clamped the top of her head in its jaws. “You just have to wait for it to realize you’re not food and let go,” she explained. “I stood for an hour, blood dripping down my face.”
I keep fish.
I keep fish.
August 24, 2026 at 10:16 PM
Knew a woman who kept two giant snakes on bunk beds in the basement. One day, the upper bunk snake clamped the top of her head in its jaws. “You just have to wait for it to realize you’re not food and let go,” she explained. “I stood for an hour, blood dripping down my face.”
I keep fish.
I keep fish.
My father forty years ago noting my attitude toward politics quoted a supposed Greek saying, “We don’t say a man who ignores politics minds his own business. Rather we say that man has no business here.”
August 21, 2026 at 9:49 PM
My father forty years ago noting my attitude toward politics quoted a supposed Greek saying, “We don’t say a man who ignores politics minds his own business. Rather we say that man has no business here.”
January is my least favorite month. Cold, dark, long. So I celebrate a summer birthday—exactly six months later.
Pisses Clarke off: his birthday is the next day.
Pisses Clarke off: his birthday is the next day.
August 19, 2026 at 5:22 PM
January is my least favorite month. Cold, dark, long. So I celebrate a summer birthday—exactly six months later.
Pisses Clarke off: his birthday is the next day.
Pisses Clarke off: his birthday is the next day.
Clarke used to work at a cheese shop. The owner hired young women for the counter. Clarke called them the cheese maidens.
They used to complain of getting Taleggio butt.
They used to complain of getting Taleggio butt.
August 17, 2026 at 9:50 PM
Clarke used to work at a cheese shop. The owner hired young women for the counter. Clarke called them the cheese maidens.
They used to complain of getting Taleggio butt.
They used to complain of getting Taleggio butt.
We got a Sears pool table when I was a kid. Dad bought a slim paperback by Willie Mosconi, the pool champion. One line stuck with me. “You know the guy. He’s a good shot maker--but then he has to be.”
I’ve remembered it because I’m that guy. Never had much of a plan.
I’ve remembered it because I’m that guy. Never had much of a plan.
August 14, 2026 at 4:59 PM
We got a Sears pool table when I was a kid. Dad bought a slim paperback by Willie Mosconi, the pool champion. One line stuck with me. “You know the guy. He’s a good shot maker--but then he has to be.”
I’ve remembered it because I’m that guy. Never had much of a plan.
I’ve remembered it because I’m that guy. Never had much of a plan.
Even though I write crime novels, I don’t like cooking with tomato sauce because it always ends up looking like I murdered someone on my stove.
August 12, 2026 at 5:41 PM
Even though I write crime novels, I don’t like cooking with tomato sauce because it always ends up looking like I murdered someone on my stove.
The meek shall inherit the earth—just not that layer at the top— Gogu.
August 10, 2026 at 6:28 PM
The meek shall inherit the earth—just not that layer at the top— Gogu.
I admire Nelson Algren’s whores’ chatter. A mentally ill prostitute in a New Orleans bordello saying to no one, “I can fly like a bird. But why did I fly in here?”
August 7, 2026 at 4:46 PM
I admire Nelson Algren’s whores’ chatter. A mentally ill prostitute in a New Orleans bordello saying to no one, “I can fly like a bird. But why did I fly in here?”
It’s the funniest thing: the motor noise when my girlfriend vacuums the carpet is less irritating than when I do it.
August 5, 2026 at 6:50 PM
It’s the funniest thing: the motor noise when my girlfriend vacuums the carpet is less irritating than when I do it.
My father worked for the Office of Weights and Measures in D.C.
A friend muttered,“You never had a chance,” as he passed by my fridge with its 3 timers, hygrometer, and my beer temp probe.
A friend muttered,“You never had a chance,” as he passed by my fridge with its 3 timers, hygrometer, and my beer temp probe.
August 3, 2026 at 11:40 PM
My father worked for the Office of Weights and Measures in D.C.
A friend muttered,“You never had a chance,” as he passed by my fridge with its 3 timers, hygrometer, and my beer temp probe.
A friend muttered,“You never had a chance,” as he passed by my fridge with its 3 timers, hygrometer, and my beer temp probe.
Ol’ Split Oar says, Up here in the mountains at Warm Lake the water comes to folks as a shock. But it isn’t called Warm Lake for the temp—it’s called that for the Memories.
That’s what I tell the folks. In 2004 wife drowned in it, drunk.
That’s what I tell the folks. In 2004 wife drowned in it, drunk.
July 31, 2026 at 5:37 PM
Ol’ Split Oar says, Up here in the mountains at Warm Lake the water comes to folks as a shock. But it isn’t called Warm Lake for the temp—it’s called that for the Memories.
That’s what I tell the folks. In 2004 wife drowned in it, drunk.
That’s what I tell the folks. In 2004 wife drowned in it, drunk.
Okay I have to admit Jimothy is cuter than me. He’s not marriageable material though. —Gogu
July 29, 2026 at 5:54 PM
Okay I have to admit Jimothy is cuter than me. He’s not marriageable material though. —Gogu