Toothpaste is lotion for your mouth

I am convinced there is a back door agreement between Big Electronic and Big Tool where Big Tool is being paid not to make tri-tipped screwdrivers readily available to the public.

I think a modern baseball reunion could fix this country.

I’m going to Sam’s Club for the first time using someone else’s card and I’m irrationally worried that I’m very obviously not look like I know what I’m doing and get removed from the establishment.

The War of the Rohirrim summed up in one sentence: woman rejects man’s proposal so he decides to make it everyone else’s problem

I reckon that flossing twice in 24 hours before my appointment ought to be enough to fool the dental hygienist into thinking that I have done this daily in the last 6 months since my last cleaning.