safety james
@scampdastard.bsky.social
most correct man alive. in a twisted psychosexual dance with SNL alum Chris Kattan.
https://linktr.ee/safetyjames
https://linktr.ee/safetyjames
new m. night movie teaser featuring a mitski song we're so fucking back
September 8, 2026 at 6:36 PM
new m. night movie teaser featuring a mitski song we're so fucking back
powerade cold berry burst vs Gatorade riptide rush who would win in a fight
September 7, 2026 at 8:52 PM
powerade cold berry burst vs Gatorade riptide rush who would win in a fight
not sure if this has been reported but the building that used to be the home of Garfield Eats (plus above residential units) is for sale
September 5, 2026 at 12:54 AM
not sure if this has been reported but the building that used to be the home of Garfield Eats (plus above residential units) is for sale
the spiderman toothbrush commercial has a split diopter shot
September 4, 2026 at 12:49 AM
the spiderman toothbrush commercial has a split diopter shot
just realized why they call it moonlight 😮
August 29, 2026 at 4:01 AM
just realized why they call it moonlight 😮
I'm fingering the empty bag of Vlasic pickle balls at the function
August 28, 2026 at 4:03 AM
I'm fingering the empty bag of Vlasic pickle balls at the function
president donald Trump is 80 years old
August 26, 2026 at 3:57 PM
president donald Trump is 80 years old
accidentally checked to see if m. night shyamalan was on wikifeet while connected to the office wi-fi
August 26, 2026 at 1:28 PM
accidentally checked to see if m. night shyamalan was on wikifeet while connected to the office wi-fi
Sasquatch, Godzilla, King Kong, loch ness, goblins, ghouls, a zombie with no conscience. Question: what do these things all have in common?
ahhh scary. they're scary!
ahhh scary. they're scary!
August 25, 2026 at 4:15 AM
Sasquatch, Godzilla, King Kong, loch ness, goblins, ghouls, a zombie with no conscience. Question: what do these things all have in common?
ahhh scary. they're scary!
ahhh scary. they're scary!
people talk about "bad bad movies" and "good bad movies" but not enough focus is given to the difference between "good good bad movies" and "bad good bad movies".
August 22, 2026 at 7:22 PM
people talk about "bad bad movies" and "good bad movies" but not enough focus is given to the difference between "good good bad movies" and "bad good bad movies".
worst thing to ever happen to me is seeing someone fancast Josh Hartnett as Mr. Sinister because now i have to go the rest of my life not having that happen
August 21, 2026 at 2:45 PM
worst thing to ever happen to me is seeing someone fancast Josh Hartnett as Mr. Sinister because now i have to go the rest of my life not having that happen
supercut of all the split diopter shots in Ma
August 21, 2026 at 3:19 AM
supercut of all the split diopter shots in Ma
you couldn't make Meet The Parents today because they'd be like "Focker In Law is coming out this year"
August 14, 2026 at 3:32 AM
you couldn't make Meet The Parents today because they'd be like "Focker In Law is coming out this year"
something I have in common with the love interest in Billy Idol's 'rebel yell' is that I don't like slavery
August 14, 2026 at 3:05 AM
something I have in common with the love interest in Billy Idol's 'rebel yell' is that I don't like slavery
Silver Springs by Fleetwood Mac makes a lot more sense once you realize that "sound" is being used as in the body of water
August 7, 2026 at 3:00 AM
Silver Springs by Fleetwood Mac makes a lot more sense once you realize that "sound" is being used as in the body of water
new #1 song I'm mad doesn't have a karaoke version i'd go crazy on this shit youtu.be/-7plMQS8wVQ?...
Toy-Box - www.girl (Official Audio)
YouTube video by Toy-Box
youtu.be
August 7, 2026 at 2:38 AM
new #1 song I'm mad doesn't have a karaoke version i'd go crazy on this shit youtu.be/-7plMQS8wVQ?...
guy at my karaoke bar always without fail gets off stage and starts to walk around the room during his song so I've started taking bets on the over/under of how long before he starts roaming
August 7, 2026 at 2:19 AM
guy at my karaoke bar always without fail gets off stage and starts to walk around the room during his song so I've started taking bets on the over/under of how long before he starts roaming
spider-man brand new day is about Peter Parker inventing SSRIs (selective spidertonin reuptake inhibitors)
August 1, 2026 at 10:25 PM
spider-man brand new day is about Peter Parker inventing SSRIs (selective spidertonin reuptake inhibitors)
Reposted by safety james
not to start discourse but what size penis do you think all the m&ms have
I'm going:
red - 5 inches and girthy
yellow - down the middle 5.5 inches
blue - 7 inches
orange - micro
I'm going:
red - 5 inches and girthy
yellow - down the middle 5.5 inches
blue - 7 inches
orange - micro
July 24, 2026 at 3:34 AM
not to start discourse but what size penis do you think all the m&ms have
I'm going:
red - 5 inches and girthy
yellow - down the middle 5.5 inches
blue - 7 inches
orange - micro
I'm going:
red - 5 inches and girthy
yellow - down the middle 5.5 inches
blue - 7 inches
orange - micro
really restraining myself from telling Will Stancil to ____________ after getting home from the bar
July 24, 2026 at 5:37 AM
really restraining myself from telling Will Stancil to ____________ after getting home from the bar
not to start discourse but what size penis do you think all the m&ms have
I'm going:
red - 5 inches and girthy
yellow - down the middle 5.5 inches
blue - 7 inches
orange - micro
I'm going:
red - 5 inches and girthy
yellow - down the middle 5.5 inches
blue - 7 inches
orange - micro
July 24, 2026 at 3:34 AM
not to start discourse but what size penis do you think all the m&ms have
I'm going:
red - 5 inches and girthy
yellow - down the middle 5.5 inches
blue - 7 inches
orange - micro
I'm going:
red - 5 inches and girthy
yellow - down the middle 5.5 inches
blue - 7 inches
orange - micro
can any sciencetists let me know the difference between explosive and NORMAL diarrhea
July 16, 2026 at 2:30 AM
can any sciencetists let me know the difference between explosive and NORMAL diarrhea
do you think mister sinister is posting mpreg fic on ao3 in X-Men world
July 11, 2026 at 3:41 AM
do you think mister sinister is posting mpreg fic on ao3 in X-Men world
this is me actually
July 10, 2026 at 8:21 PM
this is me actually