i guess I'll just redownload limbus on my laptop

There are only so many adjectives I can use to describe gorgeous work. Meticulous attention to detail. Emphasizing light and dark. Contrasting sharp strokes vs fluent/liquid. Balancing focus between several actors. Sometimes you feel stronger than you really are - and brought to your knees instead.

if i can't get him im a fraud

idk, shb/ew/dt fates being either a boring boss fight or mobrushes really numbed everything for me

sure, some of these arr escort fates / multileveled fates are slow, but with people taking it slow alongside other players; it makes the mmo world feel less cynical and more alive?

one of my lecturers did say 'love' and 'passion' is a weak motivator. they weren't wrong, at least in my case.

I'm not a saint, I'm just a random guy filled with his own self-interests and his own ambitions. when it doesn't work, I blame the skies and lament in my self-doubt and worthlessness.

in the end, I'll be my own villain in this godforsaken life

I can't say I hate drawing, I can't say I love it either. people say you need fuel for your hobbies;

anger. frustration, inferiority, that feeling of wanting to fuck everything up, that pent-up frustration to show to everyone "i'm better than that artist you put on a pedestal"

I've been thinking about it for the while but I can't believe I'm having such an unhealthy relationship with my drawings. I'm just filled with spite and vitriol I try to take it out on my creations. but fuck me do I want to destroy this inferiority plaguing my mind.

I get where you're coming from but the color variations in your experimental stuff is pretty great. maybe simplifying the thought process and working on stroke efficiency on those areas would help fight against that thought you're mulling on