Varric Tethras 🏹 🪶
@varrichousetethras.bsky.social
“Well, shit. I'm just a businessman and a storyteller.” #DragonAge #DARP
Pinned
“There's power in stories, though. That's all history is: The best tales. The ones that last. Might as well be mine.”
~ Varric Tethras
~ Varric Tethras
“Maybe, maybe not. Sometimes I write under a different pen name. Regardless, the Seeker seems to like them.”
@allegrafilomena.bsky.social
@allegrafilomena.bsky.social
“Why are there fairy smut books in the library? And did Varric write them?”
August 22, 2026 at 1:07 AM
“Maybe, maybe not. Sometimes I write under a different pen name. Regardless, the Seeker seems to like them.”
@allegrafilomena.bsky.social
@allegrafilomena.bsky.social
“I don’t think anyone could compete with that.”
If you want to get yourself killed being able to rival Varric in a chest hair contest, it's your ass.
June 8, 2026 at 10:12 PM
“I don’t think anyone could compete with that.”
"Hey, to each his own."
There is no profit in becoming a drunk in Kirkwall.
June 8, 2026 at 12:56 PM
"Hey, to each his own."
"Why question it? Is there a problem?"
I thought, however foolishly, that you might be willing to question Varric's soft spot for Solas.
June 8, 2026 at 12:54 PM
"Why question it? Is there a problem?"
"You make it sound like a bad thing."
I am to be subjected to Varric, now? Charming.
June 4, 2026 at 12:49 PM
"You make it sound like a bad thing."
"Oh Hawke....there you go again with your theories..."
"I think deep down, Varric is a big softie, but he would never admit it...so he tries to write about it instead through his characters. Just call it a hunch."
#daOCqotd happy #headcanon Wednesday!
Share a headcanon (or two...or more) you have about Varric. It can be anything! It can involve your own OC, or any other character, it can be completely safe for work, or not...up to you!
Share a headcanon (or two...or more) you have about Varric. It can be anything! It can involve your own OC, or any other character, it can be completely safe for work, or not...up to you!
June 3, 2026 at 6:17 PM
"Oh Hawke....there you go again with your theories..."
“Well, shit. You’re no fun.”
Our best plan is to stop Varric before he can rush in and make things worse.
May 31, 2026 at 2:10 PM
“Well, shit. You’re no fun.”
“Varric Tethras, at your service.”
May 31, 2026 at 2:09 PM
“Varric Tethras, at your service.”
“I get it, Seeker. You’re still sore after our little spat.”
*Sitting by the dummies contemplating all of the things yet to be done and each party members readiness as well as the inquisitors health and enemies progress*
“Is it that easy to see? Yes, I have much on my mind.”
*raises her head to see them*
“Hm? Both of you? What is it? Some mischief?”🤨
“Is it that easy to see? Yes, I have much on my mind.”
*raises her head to see them*
“Hm? Both of you? What is it? Some mischief?”🤨
*a little bit later, Varric approaches Cassandra while she's sitting on the bench near her training dummies, while Hawke is following close behind him*
"Good day, Seeker. You're looking a little forlorn today. I might have something that will cheer you up."
@allegrafilomena.bsky.social
"Good day, Seeker. You're looking a little forlorn today. I might have something that will cheer you up."
@allegrafilomena.bsky.social
May 21, 2026 at 10:10 PM
“I get it, Seeker. You’re still sore after our little spat.”
Reposted by Varric Tethras 🏹 🪶
"I'm sorry, when was this? I don't recall any of it, unless it was a dream."
As the tale is sung by the bards, there was a time when Varric was aggressive and Orlesian. An enjoyable side benefit in a land of sandwiches.
May 12, 2026 at 1:09 PM
"I'm sorry, when was this? I don't recall any of it, unless it was a dream."
"Which dog? There are many."
Varric's idea of relationship advice amounts to "Watch out for Dog - he's brooding."
May 12, 2026 at 1:08 PM
"Which dog? There are many."
“Aww shucks, you’re too kind.”
*said sarcastically and drank some ale*
*said sarcastically and drank some ale*
Your hourly reminder that we are here to shamelessly flirt with Varric.
May 3, 2026 at 2:25 PM
“Aww shucks, you’re too kind.”
*said sarcastically and drank some ale*
*said sarcastically and drank some ale*
“Come again?”
You know running your fingers through Varric's chest hair isn't as bad as I thought.
May 3, 2026 at 4:14 AM
“Come again?”
"Good, it would be great if you would stop now so I have some time to heal. I could use a break from Choir Boy for a while."
I am very tired of stabbing Varric with sturdy dwarven architecture with Sebastian Vael.
April 30, 2026 at 2:50 PM
"Good, it would be great if you would stop now so I have some time to heal. I could use a break from Choir Boy for a while."
"I'm here, aren't I?"
It would certainly be dwarven of me to decline joining the war.
April 28, 2026 at 1:17 PM
"I'm here, aren't I?"
Varric sat at his usual table in the tavern and jot down some ideas for the sequel to "Swords & Shields." He begins to write a draft of the first chapter, tapping his quill on his chin as he thinks of the next paragraph to write, looking around the room for inspiration."
April 23, 2026 at 2:08 PM
Varric sat at his usual table in the tavern and jot down some ideas for the sequel to "Swords & Shields." He begins to write a draft of the first chapter, tapping his quill on his chin as he thinks of the next paragraph to write, looking around the room for inspiration."
"It's because of my chest hair, isn't it?"
I heard the foolish superstition explored your Deep Roads. Which is bad. And now we're punching bears on sight because you mistook them for Varric. Which is also bad.
April 14, 2026 at 12:46 PM
"It's because of my chest hair, isn't it?"
"I've survived this long and published many stories. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones."
Very few people survive writing down new stories for your people.
April 13, 2026 at 1:14 PM
"I've survived this long and published many stories. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones."
"Where do people even get their information from?"
Sweep away Varric's extremely close relationship with his crossbow and a templar, and traces of a buried secret remain.
April 13, 2026 at 1:13 PM
"Where do people even get their information from?"
*laughing loudly*
“I’m sorry but, that one was pretty funny. That elf could never get over himself. The grumpiest soul I’ve ever met in my life, and that’s saying something compared to my brother Bartrand.”
“I’m sorry but, that one was pretty funny. That elf could never get over himself. The grumpiest soul I’ve ever met in my life, and that’s saying something compared to my brother Bartrand.”
Aveline finally gets Donnic's attention by teaching Fenris to read.
April 7, 2026 at 12:29 AM
*laughing loudly*
“I’m sorry but, that one was pretty funny. That elf could never get over himself. The grumpiest soul I’ve ever met in my life, and that’s saying something compared to my brother Bartrand.”
“I’m sorry but, that one was pretty funny. That elf could never get over himself. The grumpiest soul I’ve ever met in my life, and that’s saying something compared to my brother Bartrand.”
“No, but I bet Hawke wouldn’t mind that one bit.”
Varric, are you okay to be crushed to death by a wheel of cheese?
April 5, 2026 at 12:19 AM
“No, but I bet Hawke wouldn’t mind that one bit.”
"She never leaves my sight, who's doing this?"
It's so nice to see everyone caressing Bianca's trigger in a crisis. Warms the heart.
April 2, 2026 at 1:11 PM
"She never leaves my sight, who's doing this?"
“Been there, done that. She wasn’t very happy with me.”
This is the sort of venture that can make a man for life! I'm not about to take any chances getting chased by Cassandra.
April 2, 2026 at 11:15 AM
“Been there, done that. She wasn’t very happy with me.”
You usually “waffle” between decisions to avoid conflict and make everyone happy. Remember, Hawke - diplomacy gets you square pancakes. 🧇 🥞
The food, not the nickname! It’s horrible, Varric. Even for you. What does that even mean in my context?
Aha! So you do like Waffles. 🧇
April 1, 2026 at 4:01 AM
You usually “waffle” between decisions to avoid conflict and make everyone happy. Remember, Hawke - diplomacy gets you square pancakes. 🧇 🥞