uh oh it's hothands time
September 26, 2026 at 4:17 AM
uh oh it's hothands time
me: I remembered my hothands today
my friend: it's 3:30 pm, 62 degrees, and fully sunny
me: ... yes
my friend: it's 3:30 pm, 62 degrees, and fully sunny
me: ... yes
September 27, 2026 at 10:31 PM
me: I remembered my hothands today
my friend: it's 3:30 pm, 62 degrees, and fully sunny
me: ... yes
my friend: it's 3:30 pm, 62 degrees, and fully sunny
me: ... yes
"is it too late right now keez"
it is I forgot to put the hothands in my pocket
it is I forgot to put the hothands in my pocket
September 27, 2026 at 1:07 AM
"is it too late right now keez"
it is I forgot to put the hothands in my pocket
it is I forgot to put the hothands in my pocket
“You’re off the case, Hothands! After that shit you pulled in LA you’re riding a desk!”
December 24, 2023 at 3:30 PM
“You’re off the case, Hothands! After that shit you pulled in LA you’re riding a desk!”
hothands ,, forbidden crystal light
November 26, 2023 at 12:49 AM
hothands ,, forbidden crystal light
okay this is technically untrue I have an entire section of my 198 sq ft apartment dedicated to my ample hothands collection. I just didn't realize that tonight was the night
but I don't have any hothands is what I was going to say before my numb fingers betrayed me and hit post
September 26, 2026 at 4:21 AM
okay this is technically untrue I have an entire section of my 198 sq ft apartment dedicated to my ample hothands collection. I just didn't realize that tonight was the night
100% do not recommend these teabags. Funkiest tea I’ve ever tasted. 🤮
January 24, 2025 at 2:04 PM
100% do not recommend these teabags. Funkiest tea I’ve ever tasted. 🤮
but I don't have any hothands is what I was going to say before my numb fingers betrayed me and hit post
September 26, 2026 at 4:18 AM
but I don't have any hothands is what I was going to say before my numb fingers betrayed me and hit post
These little bitches are saving my life
January 25, 2025 at 2:15 AM
These little bitches are saving my life
delicately placing hothands on my cheeks: luxury
December 31, 2025 at 5:05 AM
delicately placing hothands on my cheeks: luxury
No that’s a different pile of hothands
September 26, 2026 at 5:16 AM
No that’s a different pile of hothands
presents i got for christmas from my family this year include:
- nice gloves with compartment for hothands
- box of hothands. large size
- socks. warm
- classy rain bonnet like in 1950s
- robert mcginnis artbook full of beautiful painted naked james bond ladies
- women's hockey sweatshirt
- nice gloves with compartment for hothands
- box of hothands. large size
- socks. warm
- classy rain bonnet like in 1950s
- robert mcginnis artbook full of beautiful painted naked james bond ladies
- women's hockey sweatshirt
January 3, 2026 at 3:12 AM
presents i got for christmas from my family this year include:
- nice gloves with compartment for hothands
- box of hothands. large size
- socks. warm
- classy rain bonnet like in 1950s
- robert mcginnis artbook full of beautiful painted naked james bond ladies
- women's hockey sweatshirt
- nice gloves with compartment for hothands
- box of hothands. large size
- socks. warm
- classy rain bonnet like in 1950s
- robert mcginnis artbook full of beautiful painted naked james bond ladies
- women's hockey sweatshirt
ok but be honest with me does this pile of hothands have an expiry date of 2002
September 26, 2026 at 5:09 AM
ok but be honest with me does this pile of hothands have an expiry date of 2002
*strapping hothands to my hands with hair ties because I forgot my gloves* resourcefulness is an overlooked skill set
December 16, 2025 at 2:53 AM
*strapping hothands to my hands with hair ties because I forgot my gloves* resourcefulness is an overlooked skill set
sometimes I think I'm strong enough to not open the hothands but then I end up curled up in a shivering ball on the sidewalk and the hothands fairy comes down to me and says "you moron. you absolute idiot"
January 17, 2026 at 3:28 AM
sometimes I think I'm strong enough to not open the hothands but then I end up curled up in a shivering ball on the sidewalk and the hothands fairy comes down to me and says "you moron. you absolute idiot"
my sister: what would you have done before hothands existed though
me: PEOPLE DIED BACK THEN, LIKE, ALL THE TIME OKAY
me: PEOPLE DIED BACK THEN, LIKE, ALL THE TIME OKAY
January 18, 2026 at 4:51 AM
my sister: what would you have done before hothands existed though
me: PEOPLE DIED BACK THEN, LIKE, ALL THE TIME OKAY
me: PEOPLE DIED BACK THEN, LIKE, ALL THE TIME OKAY
*drifting off to sleep, mumbling* what if they brought water beds back. but instead of water. it's hothands
January 22, 2026 at 3:54 AM
*drifting off to sleep, mumbling* what if they brought water beds back. but instead of water. it's hothands
*diving into my stash of hothands like scrooge mcduck*
January 24, 2026 at 12:41 AM
*diving into my stash of hothands like scrooge mcduck*
I've narrowed it down to 60-63 can be legs out IF I have a sweatshirt on but once you get down to 56 I need a winter parka and hothands which leaves a very narrow window in the fall where I'm not sure which one it's gonna be until it's too late
September 27, 2026 at 1:05 AM
I've narrowed it down to 60-63 can be legs out IF I have a sweatshirt on but once you get down to 56 I need a winter parka and hothands which leaves a very narrow window in the fall where I'm not sure which one it's gonna be until it's too late
the symbols of the revolution being the whistle, hothands warmers, and yaktrax
January 25, 2026 at 3:56 AM
the symbols of the revolution being the whistle, hothands warmers, and yaktrax
bringing TWO pairs of hothands today as a little treat for finishing my comic
January 24, 2026 at 9:43 PM
bringing TWO pairs of hothands today as a little treat for finishing my comic
letting my hothands burn holes thru my flesh idec
February 2, 2026 at 12:11 PM
letting my hothands burn holes thru my flesh idec
"how do you not burn yourself on hothands": the main thing is to avoid prolonged direct skin contact. yes you can burn yourself on hothands. I did it once while falling asleep on one that I was pretending was a baby chinchilla. next question
December 3, 2025 at 2:37 AM
"how do you not burn yourself on hothands": the main thing is to avoid prolonged direct skin contact. yes you can burn yourself on hothands. I did it once while falling asleep on one that I was pretending was a baby chinchilla. next question
sometimes i think. where would I be without hothands. probably dead
December 3, 2025 at 5:37 AM
sometimes i think. where would I be without hothands. probably dead
*cuddling 3 warm hothands against my cheek as I drift off to sleep* this must be what rich people feel like all the time
January 25, 2026 at 5:09 AM
*cuddling 3 warm hothands against my cheek as I drift off to sleep* this must be what rich people feel like all the time