#LovelyAssistant
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earprotectreq.bsky.social
First EPR Recommends Playlist for 2025 includes tracks from….

#franzferdinand
#dilettante
@mogwai.scot
#paleblueeyes
#doves
#manicstreetpreachers
#sportsteam
#lovelyassistant
#honesty

Click Below, Listen & Subscribe
EPR Recommends Playlist
open.spotify.com
January 12, 2025 at 8:21 AM
semperbufo.bsky.social
…and back again. (Maybe. I dunno. Just visiting?)

"Lovely Assistant" and "Jackrabbit Messiah" are 50% off at @smashwords.bsky.social's Annual Summer/Winter Sale. Check 'em out…

#SWSale2025 #Smashwords

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
#SilhouetteUniverse👤

#BookSky💙📚

#MarketingEnthusiasm
Geoph Essex's Novels on Smashwords
Buy Geoph Essex's “Silhouette” Novels through Smashwords.
sbufo.com
July 3, 2026 at 11:54 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
If you too shudder at the thought of short stories, you're in luck: "short" is one accusation that has *never* been leveled at my writing.

…and that's a good thing, I think. 😉

SilhouetteUniverse.com
#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
September 1, 2026 at 2:33 AM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Happy to point them out!

First:

#LovelyAssistant🎩
Lovely Assistant, a novel by Geoph Essex
Jenny Ng missed her last appointment, was hit by a car, and was hired by a magician on the same day. And those aren’t even remotely the strangest things that happened to her this summer. Jenny’s a ty...
www.LovelyAssistant.com
February 10, 2025 at 11:49 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Nice! Both published #SilhouetteUniverse👤 novels are over on itch; and when you buy one there, you get both an epub (for the e-reading crowd who likes some flow!) AND a PDF (for those who like to read the pages as they were originally printed!).

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
Geoph Essex's Novels on Itch.io
Preview and buy Geoph Essex's “Silhouette” Novels on Itch.io
sbufo.com
July 16, 2025 at 2:42 AM
semperbufo.bsky.social
The Smashwords End of Year Sale 2025 is on!

From now until the New Year, #LovelyAssistant🎩 and #JackrabbitMessiah🐰 will both be 50% off for the #Holidays! 🎄🕎

For more INFO, visit SilhouetteUniverse.com 👤

To BUY 'em, follow the LINK BELOW… 👇

#EoYSale25 #Smashwords #books2read
#sale #BookSky 💙📚
Geoph Essex's Novels on Smashwords
Buy Geoph Essex's “Silhouette” Novels through Smashwords.
sbufo.com
December 8, 2025 at 3:37 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Sure thing! 😉

These two take place in the same universe (though they're not directly related stories). Urban fantasy action comedy with a heart (and some scary bits).

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
SilhouetteUniverse.com 👤
Geoph Essex's “Silhouette” Novels all over the Web!
Preview and buy Geoph Essex's “Silhouette” Novels online in print and ebook formats.
sbufo.com
June 1, 2025 at 3:07 AM
semperbufo.bsky.social
'Sup?

"Lovely Assistant" and "Jackrabbit Messiah" are 50% off all July over on @smashwords.bsky.social's Annual Summer/Winter Sale. So if you're a down, or up, or any particular direction… 😉

#SWSale2025 #Smashwords

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
#SilhouetteUniverse👤

#BookSky💙📚
Geoph Essex's Novels on Smashwords
Buy Geoph Essex's “Silhouette” Novels through Smashwords.
sbufo.com
July 7, 2025 at 11:19 AM
semperbufo.bsky.social
So, only a couple days left to get "Lovely Assistant" and/or "Jackrabbit Messiah" at 50% off over on
@smashwords.bsky.social's Annual Summer/Winter Sale. If you're into great stories, grab 'em now…!

#SWSale2025 #Smashwords

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
#SilhouetteUniverse👤

#BookSky💙📚
Geoph Essex's Novels on Smashwords
Buy Geoph Essex's “Silhouette” Novels through Smashwords.
sbufo.com
July 29, 2025 at 5:39 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Hey—"Lovely Assistant" and "Jackrabbit Messiah" will be 50% off on @smashwords.bsky.social for the month of July for the Annual Summer/Winter Sale. So that's cool, which is always nice when it's hot out.

#SWSale2025 #Smashwords

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
#SilhouetteUniverse👤

#BookSky💙📚
Geoph Essex's Novels on Smashwords
Buy Geoph Essex's “Silhouette” Novels through Smashwords.
sbufo.com
June 18, 2025 at 4:35 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Hiya! "Lovely Assistant" and "Jackrabbit Messiah" are 50% off all July over on @smashwords.bsky.social's Annual Summer/Winter Sale. So if you're bookie—no, wait…booker? Well, someone who likes to READ… 😉

#SWSale2025 #Smashwords

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
#SilhouetteUniverse👤

#BookSky💙📚
Geoph Essex's Novels on Smashwords
Buy Geoph Essex's “Silhouette” Novels through Smashwords.
sbufo.com
July 3, 2025 at 2:35 AM
semperbufo.bsky.social
#WIPsnips "impede"

What do you do when a bunch of black-cloaked strangers steal your magic show props? If you're the (apparently) indestructible Jenny Ng, you opt for a face-off—in Chapter 23 of "Lovely Assistant"! (See reply…) 👇

#LovelyAssistant🎩

#WritingCommunity #Writers #Authors #Writesky
[Excerpt from Chapter 23 of "Lovely Assistant" (by me):] “Calvin!” she shouted, kicking one of her charging opponents hard in the groin. He doubled over with a *whoosh* of soundless groaning as the other slashed viciously at Jenny’s leg. “My sword!” she yelled. Calvin ducked past the man who’d cut Jenny’s leg and bowled into the bad guy who’d just stood up; the gangly magician wouldn’t win any football scholarships, but his enthusiasm made up for it, knocking the already shaken man back to land roughly on his butt. Sprawled on top of the dizzy man, Calvin stretched for the instrument case. “Dude!” Lloyd yelled out, hanging back by the door, but unwilling to abandon his friend. Lyle shouted back fearfully, “Dude!” The Ice Cream Psycho and the villains’ leader whirled and ran, black robes fluttering behind them. They rounded a corner and disappeared into the winding maze of alleys. Jenny shoved the man she’d kicked in the family jewels and he stumbled away to lean on the wall. The last bad guy standing tossed his hood for an unimpeded view of his target. He was a lean guy with dark skin and slicked back hair. His fuzzy facial hair wasn’t so much Evil Henchman as Coffee House Poetry Slam Contestant. Like the Ice Cream Psycho, he didn’t smile devilishly at her; his mouth set and his eyes cold, he focused on the task at hand. [Continued excerpt from Chapter 23 of "Lovely Assistant" (by me):] They squared off, Jenny crouching in her best imitation of the Ultimate Fighter competitions she’d caught on Keith Heckler’s television late at night. She understood that keeping a low center of gravity was a good thing, but she wasn’t solid on why that was, or what she could do with an adequately low center of gravity. The guy slashed at her, grinding his teeth fiercely. She dodged, and he only nicked her side. Her leg had already healed up, leaving just a frayed rip in her black leggings, now matched by the tiny hole torn in the white shirt she’d thrown on over her show costume. Calvin’s voice rang out: “Sword!” Jenny barely glanced over as she caught the weapon the magician tossed her way. The sword was mostly hilt, so there wasn’t much danger of accidentally catching it by the blade, but she flinched reflexively as the leather slapped into her palm anyway. She gripped it tightly and swung the sword in front of her, glaring a challenge at the Beatnik with the knife. The exaggerated difference between his knife and her giant, curved sword threw off his rhythm. [Continued excerpt from Chapter 23 of "Lovely Assistant" (by me):] The man beneath Calvin McGuirk bucked violently, toppling the magician into a splayed collection of long limbs on the asphalt. Rising, the man shouted unintelligibly—it wasn’t another language, Jenny knew, because she would have understood it if it was. The groin-kick victim scrambled toward the turn in the alley, with Calvin’s opponent following quickly. They paused at the corner and shouted back at the Beatnik: “Come on!” Distracted by Calvin’s fall and the escaping crooks, Jenny let her guard down for a moment; the Beatnik seized his opportunity. Lyle shouted a warning. The glittering knife plunged into Jenny’s chest with a spurt of blood and the crunch of bone. The Beatnik tried to pull it out, but it was stuck; he tugged hard, jostling Jenny’s body as she stared at back him. It was the calm smirk on her face that must have done it. His eyes wide, the Beatnik let go of the knife and ran to join his partners, the three of them racing to follow the other two black-robed burglars into the humid darkness. The echoes of crunching and scuffing died away, leaving only the heavy breathing of the four young people shuddering in the crashing final notes of the Fight or Flight Symphony. Jenny and Calvin stared, exhausted, at the corner where the thieves had disappeared. Lyle and Lloyd stared, wide-eyed, at the knife stuck in Jenny’s chest.
November 26, 2025 at 4:40 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Y'know what'd be really cool? If, instead of following me for spurts of 300-character ideas and insights, you headed over and bought my books, which are a few hundred pages of ideas and insights. 😁

You can also do both! Don't let me stop you, there.

#LovelyAssistant🎩 #JackrabbitMessiah🐰
#BookSky💙📚
The Silhouette Universe
The official Website of Geoph Essex's Silhouette Universe, a bizarre, quirky setting for various novels and other stories.
www.SilhouetteUniverse.com
January 12, 2025 at 3:43 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Recent? 🤪

(Okay, I do have upcoming stuff eventually.)

But meanwhile, these are still, y'know, "fresh." 😁

books2read.com/lovelyassistant
books2read.com/jackrabbitmessiah

SilhouetteUniverse.com
[Promo art for a book:] A stylized cartoon scene, as if done with paper cut-outs: a young woman with spiky black hair, in glasses and a theatrical outfit complete with a pink tutu, stands in a spotlight, holding a magician's top hat in one hand; out of the hat, a green tentacle wriggles, bathed in otherworldly light. At the woman's feet, a white bunny looks up apprehensively at the tentacle. [The text over and down the image reads:] LOVELY ASSISTANT by Geoph Essex Jenny Ng missed her last appointment, was hit by a car, and was hired by a magician on the same day. And those aren't even remotely the strangest things that happened to her this summer. Jenny's a typical New Yorker, too jaded too early, struggling to get by in the big city. Of course, the typical New Yorker rarely has to deal with very large and sardonic horses, magic swords, severed limbs, and mirror images that refuse to cooperate with all that reflecting business. But Jenny learns to cope. With the help of a clever conjurer, a few feckless friends, and enough Grim Reapers to fill out a football league, it's up to Jenny to learn the finer points of Life and Death…and save the world while she's at it. www.LovelyAssistant.com [Promo image for a book:] Blue wallpaper with a slightly torn seam; some cut-out white paper clouds hovering in front of the wall, and an unfolded chain of cut-out plain white paper figures linked hand to hand across the image, in front of the wall. To one side of the picture, one paper figure in the chain has pink horns on its head. To the other side of the picture, one figure has ripped free from the figures on either side of it; this figure has bunny ears, and a small strip of yellow paper is coiled above it like a halo. [Text over and down the image reads:] Madmen and messiahs are often mistaken for one another. But when a lunatic claims to be a deity, there's always a third option. Maybe he's crazy…*and* a god. It doesn't take long for NYPD psychiatrist Amity Sheridan to diagnose her new patient as a schizophrenic with delusions of godhood—but that doesn't explain how he survived a twenty-storey fall onto Eighth Avenue without a scratch. When Jackrabbit escapes—as he always does—Amity tumbles into a wider, woolier world of gods, legends and heroes recruited to perform an age-old ritual that keeps a terrible evil in check. The key to defeating a villain that gobbles up minds and souls is Jackrabbit's unique knack for being supremely—perhaps even divinely—elusive. Unfortunately, his talent for escaping even the gods themselves makes it that much harder for the good guys to track him down for the job…and their soul-swallowing foe is already laying out the good silverware for a world-sized meal. JACKRABBIT MESSIAH a novel by Geoph Essex www.JackrabbitMessiah.com
April 23, 2025 at 3:44 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
#Booksky 💙📚

That photo of a possum looking in a mirror inspired me to post this excerpt from my novel, 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘈𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵—early on in Chapter Seven.

Point of fact: Jenny's mirror image is, by far, 𝘯𝘰𝘵 the strangest thing in the book.

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#SilhouetteUniverse👤
www.SilhouetteUniverse.com
She finished up, swished some toothpaste in her mouth for a minute before gargling and spitting, and splashed her face and hair with cold water. Her hair was a mess, but that was why she kept it short and spiky—it was hard to tell what was intentional and what was a bad hair day. She exchanged looks with her mirror image and hoped she was faring slightly better than Mirror Jenny. They stuck out their tongues at each other. Jenny reached over and flicked the light switch. Movement caught her eye before the bathroom went pitch dark. Jenny immediately flicked the light back on and looked around. Nothing there. She checked the mirror. Mirror Jenny nodded at her. That was a little disconcerting; Jenny hadn’t nodded. Jenny tightened her lips and made an executive decision to ignore this particular incident until further notice. She vehemently looked anywhere else, shut the light off again, and huffed back out of the bathroom.
April 6, 2024 at 5:29 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
And a book beginning with "L" as well. 😉

#LovelyAssistant🎩

www.LovelyAssistant.com
[Promo art for a book:] A stylized cartoon scene, looking like it was made from paper cut-outs: a young woman in glasses and a theatrical outfit complete with a tutu stands in a spotlight. She holds a magician's top hat in one hand; out of the hat, a green tentacle wriggles, bathed in otherworldly light. At the woman's feet, a white bunny looks up apprehensively at the tentacle coming out of the hat. The text reads: LOVELY ASSISTANT by Geoph Essex Jenny Ng missed her last appointment, was hit by a car, and was hired by a magician on the same day. And those aren't even remotely the strangest things that happened to her this summer. Jenny's a typical New Yorker, too jaded too early, struggling to get by in the big city. Of course, the typical New Yorker rarely has to deal with very large and sardonic horses, magic swords, severed limbs, and mirror images that refuse to cooperate with all that reflecting business. But Jenny learns to cope. With the help of a clever conjurer, a few feckless friends, and enough Grim Reapers to fill out a football league, it's up to Jenny to learn the finer points of Life and Death…and save the world while she's at it.
February 12, 2025 at 9:05 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
#LovelyAssistant🎩

Jenny Ng missed her last appointment, was hit by a car, and was hired by a magician on the same day.

And those aren’t even remotely the strangest things that happened to her this summer.

LovelyAssistant.com

Universal Link: sbufo.com/UR/?L=b2rla
[Promo art for a book:] A stylized cartoon scene, as if done with paper cut-outs: a young woman with spiky black hair, in glasses and a theatrical outfit complete with a pink tutu, stands in a spotlight, holding a magician's top hat in one hand; out of the hat, a green tentacle wriggles, bathed in otherworldly light. At the woman's feet, a white bunny looks up apprehensively at the tentacle. [The text over and down the image reads:] LOVELY ASSISTANT by Geoph Essex Jenny Ng missed her last appointment, was hit by a car, and was hired by a magician on the same day. And those aren't even remotely the strangest things that happened to her this summer. Jenny's a typical New Yorker, too jaded too early, struggling to get by in the big city. Of course, the typical New Yorker rarely has to deal with very large and sardonic horses, magic swords, severed limbs, and mirror images that refuse to cooperate with all that reflecting business. But Jenny learns to cope. With the help of a clever conjurer, a few feckless friends, and enough Grim Reapers to fill out a football league, it's up to Jenny to learn the finer points of Life and Death…and save the world while she's at it. www.LovelyAssistant.com
August 23, 2025 at 6:53 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Another round of #Repostober #art, with a bonus that it's an old #illustration of Jenny Ng, the protagonist from my novel #LovelyAssistant🎩. And yeah, of course: I did the art and design for the cover of the book as well, so here ya go!

#coverDesign
A strange, warped reddish background behind a young woman wearing a black hoodie, black jeans, black boots, and leaning on a tall, strange weapon that's more than half leather-bound hilt and less than half sharp, curving blade. Copies of the novel "Lovely Assistant" (by Geoph Essex) showing the cover design.
October 14, 2023 at 12:11 AM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Hate Amazon? You can buy my books elsewhere without going through them! (Like them? Well, the books are still there. Feel free.) Paperback, ebook, even PDF…!

UBL: books2read.com/geophessex
Also on itch! semperbufo.itch.io

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰

SilhouetteUniverse.com 👤
[Promo art for a book:] A stylized cartoon scene, as if done with paper cut-outs: a young woman with spiky black hair, in glasses and a theatrical outfit complete with a pink tutu, stands in a spotlight, holding a magician's top hat in one hand; out of the hat, a green tentacle wriggles, bathed in otherworldly light. At the woman's feet, a white bunny looks up apprehensively at the tentacle. [The text over and down the image reads:] LOVELY ASSISTANT by Geoph Essex Jenny Ng missed her last appointment, was hit by a car, and was hired by a magician on the same day. And those aren't even remotely the strangest things that happened to her this summer. Jenny's a typical New Yorker, too jaded too early, struggling to get by in the big city. Of course, the typical New Yorker rarely has to deal with very large and sardonic horses, magic swords, severed limbs, and mirror images that refuse to cooperate with all that reflecting business. But Jenny learns to cope. With the help of a clever conjurer, a few feckless friends, and enough Grim Reapers to fill out a football league, it's up to Jenny to learn the finer points of Life and Death…and save the world while she's at it. www.LovelyAssistant.com [Promo image for a book:] Blue wallpaper with a slightly torn seam; some cut-out white paper clouds hovering in front of the wall, and an unfolded chain of cut-out plain white paper figures linked hand to hand across the image, in front of the wall. To one side of the picture, one paper figure in the chain has pink horns on its head. To the other side of the picture, one figure has ripped free from the figures on either side of it; this figure has bunny ears, and a small strip of yellow paper is coiled above it like a halo. [Text over and down the image reads:] Madmen and messiahs are often mistaken for one another. But when a lunatic claims to be a deity, there's always a third option. Maybe he's crazy…*and* a god. It doesn't take long for NYPD psychiatrist Amity Sheridan to diagnose her new patient as a schizophrenic with delusions of godhood—but that doesn't explain how he survived a twenty-storey fall onto Eighth Avenue without a scratch. When Jackrabbit escapes—as he always does—Amity tumbles into a wider, woolier world of gods, legends and heroes recruited to perform an age-old ritual that keeps a terrible evil in check. The key to defeating a villain that gobbles up minds and souls is Jackrabbit's unique knack for being supremely—perhaps even divinely—elusive. Unfortunately, his talent for escaping even the gods themselves makes it that much harder for the good guys to track him down for the job…and their soul-swallowing foe is already laying out the good silverware for a world-sized meal. JACKRABBIT MESSIAH a novel by Geoph Essex www.JackrabbitMessiah.com
April 14, 2025 at 2:31 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Excellent thought—thanks for the nudge!

I'm pulling away from Amazon, too, with my books available in all sorts of places…

(Paperback, ebook, and even PDF!)

UBL: books2read.com/geophessex
Itch: semperbufo.itch.io
SilhouetteUniverse.com

#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
#SilhouetteUniverse👤
[Promo art for a book:] A stylized cartoon scene, as if done with paper cut-outs: a young woman with spiky black hair, in glasses and a theatrical outfit complete with a pink tutu, stands in a spotlight, holding a magician's top hat in one hand; out of the hat, a green tentacle wriggles, bathed in otherworldly light. At the woman's feet, a white bunny looks up apprehensively at the tentacle. [The text over and down the image reads:] LOVELY ASSISTANT by Geoph Essex Jenny Ng missed her last appointment, was hit by a car, and was hired by a magician on the same day. And those aren't even remotely the strangest things that happened to her this summer. Jenny's a typical New Yorker, too jaded too early, struggling to get by in the big city. Of course, the typical New Yorker rarely has to deal with very large and sardonic horses, magic swords, severed limbs, and mirror images that refuse to cooperate with all that reflecting business. But Jenny learns to cope. With the help of a clever conjurer, a few feckless friends, and enough Grim Reapers to fill out a football league, it's up to Jenny to learn the finer points of Life and Death…and save the world while she's at it. www.LovelyAssistant.com [Promo image for a book:] Blue wallpaper with a slightly torn seam; some cut-out white paper clouds hovering in front of the wall, and an unfolded chain of cut-out plain white paper figures linked hand to hand across the image, in front of the wall. To one side of the picture, one paper figure in the chain has pink horns on its head. To the other side of the picture, one figure has ripped free from the figures on either side of it; this figure has bunny ears, and a small strip of yellow paper is coiled above it like a halo. [Text over and down the image reads:] Madmen and messiahs are often mistaken for one another. But when a lunatic claims to be a deity, there's always a third option. Maybe he's crazy…*and* a god. It doesn't take long for NYPD psychiatrist Amity Sheridan to diagnose her new patient as a schizophrenic with delusions of godhood—but that doesn't explain how he survived a twenty-storey fall onto Eighth Avenue without a scratch. When Jackrabbit escapes—as he always does—Amity tumbles into a wider, woolier world of gods, legends and heroes recruited to perform an age-old ritual that keeps a terrible evil in check. The key to defeating a villain that gobbles up minds and souls is Jackrabbit's unique knack for being supremely—perhaps even divinely—elusive. Unfortunately, his talent for escaping even the gods themselves makes it that much harder for the good guys to track him down for the job…and their soul-swallowing foe is already laying out the good silverware for a world-sized meal. JACKRABBIT MESSIAH a novel by Geoph Essex www.JackrabbitMessiah.com
April 14, 2025 at 2:37 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
Oh, hi, Bluesky, almost forgot I should occasionally point something out.

Books! Excellent ones! Funny adventurous scary strange, mysterious odd action-packed weird books! I know all of this because I wrote them. Hm. Share and enjoy!

SilhouetteUniverse.com
#LovelyAssistant🎩
#JackrabbitMessiah🐰
LOVELY ASSISTANT by Geoph Essex Jenny Ng missed her last appointment, was hit by a car, and was hired by a magician on the same day. And those aren't even remotely the strangest things that happened to her this summer. Jenny's a typical New Yorker, too jaded too early, struggling to get by in the big city. Of course, the typical New Yorker rarely has to deal with very large and sardonic horses, magic swords, severed limbs, and mirror images that refuse to cooperate with all that reflecting business. But Jenny learns to cope. With the help of a clever conjurer, a few feckless friends, and enough Grim Reapers to fill out a football league, it's up to Jenny to learn the finer points of Life and Death…and save the world while she's at it. Madmen and messiahs are often mistaken for one another. But when a lunatic claims to be a deity, there's always a third option. Maybe he's crazy…*and* a god. It doesn't take long for NYPD psychiatrist Amity Sheridan to diagnose her new patient as a schizophrenic with delusions of godhood—but that doesn't explain how he survived a twenty-storey fall onto Eighth Avenue without a scratch. When Jackrabbit escapes—as he always does—Amity tumbles into a wider, woolier world of gods, legends and heroes recruited to perform an age-old ritual that keeps a terrible evil in check. The key to defeating a villain that gobbles up minds and souls is Jackrabbit's unique knack for being supremely—perhaps even divinely—elusive. Unfortunately, his talent for escaping even the gods themselves makes it that much harder for the good guys to track him down for the job…and their soul-swallowing foe is already laying out the good silverware for a world-sized meal. JACKRABBIT MESSIAH a novel by Geoph Essex
October 9, 2023 at 10:51 PM
semperbufo.bsky.social
A LOVELY IDEA for a random Wednesday…!

#LovelyAssistant🎩

Site: LovelyAssistant.com

Universal Book Link: sbufo.com/UR/?L=b2rla
[Excerpt from Chapter 15 of "Lovely Assistant" (by me):] …Or would it be— She fished out one of the mirrors and stared. —something much, much weirder. The surface itself seemed to ripple and warp, like silk being twisted and untwisted, tightening and flowing across a flat table. Beneath the surface, smoke and amorphous shapes roiled and coiled in a sinuous dance of eerie angles and diabolic parabolic curves. She flashed back to Wednesday’s show, strains of *Night on Bald Mountain* playing dark and fiery chords in her head. This, she determined, was not at all normal behavior from a mirror. It wasn’t even normal considering what she’d come to *accept* as normal, which was itself pretty far from normal. She would’ve given anything to see Mirror Jenny swish into view, tongue waggling, eyes rolling, fingers in her ears; but her feckless reflection was nowhere to be found in the smoky void through the little mirror. A shimmer of sound cascaded through Wonderland like rainfall, and a horse growled and whinnied miles away. Her fingertips hovered just above the undulating surface of the mirror, pushing closer... A fearsome shriek pierced the fog as a massive shoulder slammed into her hand, knocking the mirror to the ground. Jenny snapped out of her trance and looked up; Rex’s eyes were wide and panicked, his breath coming in short snarls of steam from both nostrils. He flicked his eyes at the mirror lying face down on the ground, pink and shiny and innocent, gleaming dully in an unseen white light overhead. [Continued excerpt from Chapter 15 of "Lovely Assistant" (by me):] Jenny shook herself and looked at the mirror, not far from the apples that had rolled across the blurry grass when she’d unconsciously dropped the plastic bag. “Right,” she said to Rex. “Thanks.” She rubbed his neck gratefully. “What *was* that? What *is* that?” Rex might have had answers, but they required more detailed language than even his expressive eyes and body language could convey. He snorted quietly and lowered his head to nuzzle her hair. She patted his nose but pulled away. A couple of steps over, she bent down to pick up the pink plastic shell. Jenny felt the urge to flip it over and stare at the mirror, and found herself shifting it in her fingers to turn it—she heard a growly *neigh* behind her and steeled herself against the draw of the dark and smoky place. Shoving the mirror in her shoulder bag, she gave Rex a tight-lipped smile. “I’m fine.” His dark eyes doubted her. “I’m fine, I promise,” Jenny said. She shuffled her way back to the horse, picking up apples as she went and rolling them toward the plastic bag. He got the nearest one and crushed it loudly at her between his giant yellowed teeth. “Yeah, I know,” said Jenny. “Whatever it is, it’s off limits.” She handed him an apple, and his extraordinarily adroit lips grabbed it and threw it behind his teeth to meet the same mashed up fate as its colleagues. Jenny hugged him and put her face against his leathery, sweaty hide. Rex curved his body around her and tickled the back of her neck with his fuzzy chin. [Continued excerpt from Chapter 15 of "Lovely Assistant" (by me):] Though Jenny had never had a thing for horses—she hadn’t even gone through the unicorn phase half her friends had gone through—she understood the attraction, at least where Rex was concerned. He was a huge, utterly loyal masculine force that only wanted to protect her. Maybe all those girls who got into horses just had major daddy issues. Jenny wouldn’t know; she never really had a daddy. Her father, Dewey—he’d accepted an Anglicized name more readily than her mom—was a hard- working guy, and she didn’t see him much even before he died. She was pretty sure her brother Peter had no real memories of their dad at all. Jenny never saw it as a disadvantage, though. To her, a father was a strong, quiet presence that kept everything running smoothly, even in its absence. She’d never had to learn that even fathers have feet of clay and unfair high school dating policies. Jenny cleared her throat and sniffed, pulling away and straightening herself out. “So,” she said. “You’ll be okay in here a little while longer? Sunset’s not too long now.” Rex stoically accepted his lonely burden. “Okay,” said Jenny. “I’m sorry. We’ll figure out something better for the long term.” She had no idea where she was going to keep over a ton of horse flesh that needed to be fed and, put politely, “walked,” but she didn’t like the idea of leaving him in Wonderland all the time. Getting him in and out of her apartment would be a simple matter of going through her bathroom mirror, but keeping him there might be a bit too much to handle—for both of them. *We’ll figure it out*, she thought, and she gave him one last pat on the nose and slipped away. She picked her way back up the rocks, rounded the more sinister Wonderland version of the castle, and headed for the theater to go back through the bathroom mirror to the real world. [Promo art for a book:] A stylized cartoon scene, as if done with paper cut-outs: a young woman with spiky black hair, in glasses and a theatrical outfit complete with a pink tutu, stands in a spotlight, holding a magician's top hat in one hand; out of the hat, a green tentacle wriggles, bathed in otherworldly light. At the woman's feet, a white bunny looks up apprehensively at the tentacle. [The text over and down the image reads:] LOVELY ASSISTANT by Geoph Essex Jenny Ng missed her last appointment, was hit by a car, and was hired by a magician on the same day. And those aren't even remotely the strangest things that happened to her this summer. Jenny's a typical New Yorker, too jaded too early, struggling to get by in the big city. Of course, the typical New Yorker rarely has to deal with very large and sardonic horses, magic swords, severed limbs, and mirror images that refuse to cooperate with all that reflecting business. But Jenny learns to cope. With the help of a clever conjurer, a few feckless friends, and enough Grim Reapers to fill out a football league, it's up to Jenny to learn the finer points of Life and Death…and save the world while she's at it. www.LovelyAssistant.com
September 17, 2025 at 3:13 PM
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Lovely Assistant:
🎵 Magazine

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▶️ Song/Cover on #Bandcamp:
Lovely Assistant – Love Moves in Ordinary Ways, by NARC. magazine
from the album NARC. Compilation Album #15
narcmagazine.bandcamp.com
April 20, 2026 at 3:29 AM
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Lovely Assistant:
🎵 Mother Mary's Superposition

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▶️ Song on #Spotify:
Mother Mary's Superposition
Lovely Assistant · Mother Mary's Superposition · Song · 2024
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November 18, 2024 at 12:18 AM
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Lovely Assistant:
🎵 Mother Mary's Superposition

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▶️ 🪄 Automagic 🔊 show 📻 playlist on Spotify
▶️ Song on #Spotify:
Mother Mary's Superposition
Lovely Assistant · Mother Mary's Superposition · Song · 2024
open.spotify.com
November 17, 2024 at 1:18 PM