Can't imagine the relief someone feels when managing to escape Leeds, indeed Yorkshire more generally, and land in Bucharest. Huge leap forward in human welfare. Presumably they don't bother offering return tickets? #shotsfired
September 30, 2026 at 11:44 AM
Can't imagine the relief someone feels when managing to escape Leeds, indeed Yorkshire more generally, and land in Bucharest. Huge leap forward in human welfare. Presumably they don't bother offering return tickets? #shotsfired
vet: I'm surprised he fit in that carrier. is it like a TARDIS?
pure savagery 😭😭😭😭
23lbs
bud 😵
#cats #catsbelike #shotsfired #savage
pure savagery 😭😭😭😭
23lbs
bud 😵
#cats #catsbelike #shotsfired #savage
September 8, 2026 at 2:01 PM
vet: I'm surprised he fit in that carrier. is it like a TARDIS?
pure savagery 😭😭😭😭
23lbs
bud 😵
#cats #catsbelike #shotsfired #savage
pure savagery 😭😭😭😭
23lbs
bud 😵
#cats #catsbelike #shotsfired #savage
A friend recently said to me that he is a comic genius, and I am comic sans. He reaaserted his comic genius last night. I said that the only comic he reminded me of was the Beano. In that it was good thirty years ago. #shotsfired
September 5, 2026 at 9:35 PM
A friend recently said to me that he is a comic genius, and I am comic sans. He reaaserted his comic genius last night. I said that the only comic he reminded me of was the Beano. In that it was good thirty years ago. #shotsfired
August 8, 2026 at 11:02 PM
abdul it's like this fr i have a very particular set of skills banning officials' stock trading & lowering the cost of groceries, they registered me as a lethal weapon, bro, shadow company. i refused to be a pezzonovante dancing on the strings. it's my time. senator corleone. no cap #wow #shotsfired
July 31, 2026 at 4:11 AM
abdul it's like this fr i have a very particular set of skills banning officials' stock trading & lowering the cost of groceries, they registered me as a lethal weapon, bro, shadow company. i refused to be a pezzonovante dancing on the strings. it's my time. senator corleone. no cap #wow #shotsfired
July 28, 2026 at 1:50 AM
July 23, 2026 at 6:22 PM
So I guess McIlroy is off DeChambeau's Christmas card list now?! #golf #ShotsFired
July 18, 2026 at 7:06 PM
So I guess McIlroy is off DeChambeau's Christmas card list now?! #golf #ShotsFired
Sam: Oh, and kids, when the time comes, I want you to do me a big favor.
99: What's that, Sam?
Sam: Tiptoe into my room and whisper in my ear that MY MOTHER, THE CAR is coming back on television.
Max: Why?
Sam: So I won't mind going.
#ShotsFired #IWantThatRobe
99: What's that, Sam?
Sam: Tiptoe into my room and whisper in my ear that MY MOTHER, THE CAR is coming back on television.
Max: Why?
Sam: So I won't mind going.
#ShotsFired #IWantThatRobe
June 29, 2026 at 8:50 PM
Sam: Oh, and kids, when the time comes, I want you to do me a big favor.
99: What's that, Sam?
Sam: Tiptoe into my room and whisper in my ear that MY MOTHER, THE CAR is coming back on television.
Max: Why?
Sam: So I won't mind going.
#ShotsFired #IWantThatRobe
99: What's that, Sam?
Sam: Tiptoe into my room and whisper in my ear that MY MOTHER, THE CAR is coming back on television.
Max: Why?
Sam: So I won't mind going.
#ShotsFired #IWantThatRobe
If you can outrun the cops they might shoot you in the back.
Can’t catch ya, so they kill ya.
Cops aren’t judges.
They ain’t the jury.
And they damn sure ain’t the fuckin executioner, even if they mad they lost a fuckin foot race!
#ArrestKillerCops
#ShotsFired
Can’t catch ya, so they kill ya.
Cops aren’t judges.
They ain’t the jury.
And they damn sure ain’t the fuckin executioner, even if they mad they lost a fuckin foot race!
#ArrestKillerCops
#ShotsFired
June 26, 2026 at 11:03 PM
If you can outrun the cops they might shoot you in the back.
Can’t catch ya, so they kill ya.
Cops aren’t judges.
They ain’t the jury.
And they damn sure ain’t the fuckin executioner, even if they mad they lost a fuckin foot race!
#ArrestKillerCops
#ShotsFired
Can’t catch ya, so they kill ya.
Cops aren’t judges.
They ain’t the jury.
And they damn sure ain’t the fuckin executioner, even if they mad they lost a fuckin foot race!
#ArrestKillerCops
#ShotsFired
#BREAKING‼️: A man was shot to death at the Riverview Mobile Home Park in Greenville County. The Greenville County Sheriff’s Office is investigating. #deathinvestigation #GreenvilleCounty #shotsfired
June 25, 2026 at 3:41 PM
#BREAKING‼️: A man was shot to death at the Riverview Mobile Home Park in Greenville County. The Greenville County Sheriff’s Office is investigating. #deathinvestigation #GreenvilleCounty #shotsfired
I do not ask that you change your own terminology but that you acknowledge the sanctity of this culinary miracle and respect our boundaries of recognition.
May your anti-Trump chants be loud today, and may your American biscuits be warm and buttery always.
/thread
May your anti-Trump chants be loud today, and may your American biscuits be warm and buttery always.
/thread
June 19, 2026 at 7:08 PM
Browsing through Quattroruote* 6/1996 during my lunch break.
I disapprove of the lack of VWs in this comparison, but we all know the Polo GTI didn't exist yet in 1996.
At least there's the Ibiza, which is sort of a Polo, to represent VAG.
#shotsfired
I disapprove of the lack of VWs in this comparison, but we all know the Polo GTI didn't exist yet in 1996.
At least there's the Ibiza, which is sort of a Polo, to represent VAG.
#shotsfired
June 18, 2026 at 11:39 AM
Browsing through Quattroruote* 6/1996 during my lunch break.
I disapprove of the lack of VWs in this comparison, but we all know the Polo GTI didn't exist yet in 1996.
At least there's the Ibiza, which is sort of a Polo, to represent VAG.
#shotsfired
I disapprove of the lack of VWs in this comparison, but we all know the Polo GTI didn't exist yet in 1996.
At least there's the Ibiza, which is sort of a Polo, to represent VAG.
#shotsfired
Maybe it’s a Gen X thing, like how I don’t appreciate Southland Tales #ShotsFired
June 16, 2026 at 9:02 PM
Maybe it’s a Gen X thing, like how I don’t appreciate Southland Tales #ShotsFired
Even Ange couldn't get us into the bottom 3 #ShotsFired
June 10, 2026 at 2:39 PM
Even Ange couldn't get us into the bottom 3 #ShotsFired
So this just happened. Binface burns Burnham. #Makerfield #ShotsFired
June 8, 2026 at 4:31 PM
So this just happened. Binface burns Burnham. #Makerfield #ShotsFired
good jokes always have some truth in them! 🤣🤣🤣
how to tell if someone is american.
comedian: anisa nandaula
#blacksky🎭comedy #comedysky
how to tell if someone is american.
comedian: anisa nandaula
#blacksky🎭comedy #comedysky
June 5, 2026 at 11:51 AM
June 3, 2026 at 4:58 AM