Tommy got his Putin talking points scrambled.
November 27, 2024 at 4:03 PM
Tommy got his Putin talking points scrambled.
1 scrambled egg = basically nothing
2 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
3 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
4 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
5 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
2 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
3 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
4 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
5 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
March 24, 2026 at 1:44 AM
1 scrambled egg = basically nothing
2 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
3 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
4 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
5 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
2 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
3 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
4 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
5 scrambled eggs = 2 scrambled eggs
Ate some scrambled eggs today like a goddamned millionaire.
March 11, 2025 at 9:22 PM
Ate some scrambled eggs today like a goddamned millionaire.
alright this guy absolutely has scrambled eggs for brains
Gov. Jared Polis, fresh off being censured by the Colorado Democratic Party for letting Tina Peters out of prison early, showed up today to a private, internal party call like this #copolitics
May 27, 2026 at 4:01 PM
alright this guy absolutely has scrambled eggs for brains
Bacon & scrambled eggs with healthy toast!!
September 26, 2026 at 12:21 PM
Bacon & scrambled eggs with healthy toast!!
egg gets scrambled!!!!!!!!!!!!
December 12, 2025 at 8:00 PM
egg gets scrambled!!!!!!!!!!!!
scrambled brain
Trump: "We call them the water drugs. The drugs that come in through water. They're not coming. There are no boats anymore. Frankly, there are no fishing boats. There are no boats out there period, if you want to know the truth. Does anybody go fishing anymore?"
October 7, 2025 at 6:12 PM
scrambled brain
apparently i have "ruined" the eggnog because "obviously" the eggs "shouldn't have been scrambled"
December 15, 2024 at 11:01 PM
apparently i have "ruined" the eggnog because "obviously" the eggs "shouldn't have been scrambled"
Work week hasn't even officially started and already my brain is scrambled 😵💫
September 28, 2026 at 10:24 AM
Work week hasn't even officially started and already my brain is scrambled 😵💫
once you're burdened with the knowledge of making perfect scrambled eggs you can never go back to eating crummy scrambled eggs
December 3, 2025 at 1:07 PM
once you're burdened with the knowledge of making perfect scrambled eggs you can never go back to eating crummy scrambled eggs
November 5, 2025 at 3:27 AM
I wish he scrambled more.
Pony up!
Pony up!
I will pay you real money to say something bad about Jordan Love
April 27, 2026 at 6:02 PM
I wish he scrambled more.
Pony up!
Pony up!
Mamdani is going to implement Sriracha law. Everyone will have to slather hot sauce on their scrambled eggs
Mamdani is going to implement My Sharona law. Everyone will have to create songs with undeniable rock beats.
Mamdani is going to implement Shari Lewis law.
Everyone will be required to stick their fist up a lamb's a
Excuse me, there's someone at the door.
Everyone will be required to stick their fist up a lamb's a
Excuse me, there's someone at the door.
November 9, 2025 at 4:01 AM
Mamdani is going to implement Sriracha law. Everyone will have to slather hot sauce on their scrambled eggs
Polish and NATO jets scrambled, Warsaw airport closes after Ukrainian reports of Russian drones over Poland.
Polish and NATO jets scrambled, Warsaw airport shut after Ukrainian reports of Russian drones over Poland | CNN
Polish authorities have closed Warsaw International Airport and Polish and NATO aircraft have been scrambled as reports have surfaced of Russian drones over the country.
www.cnn.com
September 10, 2025 at 1:30 AM
Polish and NATO jets scrambled, Warsaw airport closes after Ukrainian reports of Russian drones over Poland.
NATO has scrambled aircraft.
September 9, 2025 at 10:48 PM
NATO has scrambled aircraft.
Patience level:
I’m making an omelet…nope, I’m making scrambled eggs.
I’m making an omelet…nope, I’m making scrambled eggs.
January 14, 2025 at 4:36 PM
Patience level:
I’m making an omelet…nope, I’m making scrambled eggs.
I’m making an omelet…nope, I’m making scrambled eggs.
tragically the cat has been scrambled
August 18, 2024 at 11:47 PM
tragically the cat has been scrambled
Gingers getting that word scrambled within 24 hours
September 23, 2026 at 11:22 PM
Gingers getting that word scrambled within 24 hours
Here's something that's bothered me for years: why are scrambled eggs so much easier to eat? I feel like I could eat 8 scrambled eggs without even thinking. Eight fried eggs feels like a lot. Eight boiled eggs? Absurd
March 24, 2026 at 1:24 AM
Here's something that's bothered me for years: why are scrambled eggs so much easier to eat? I feel like I could eat 8 scrambled eggs without even thinking. Eight fried eggs feels like a lot. Eight boiled eggs? Absurd
SCRAMBLED
February 18, 2025 at 1:21 PM
SCRAMBLED
AOC getting on IG and jabbing herself with egg freezing hormones has scrambled many male brains [lauditory]
August 12, 2026 at 10:59 PM
AOC getting on IG and jabbing herself with egg freezing hormones has scrambled many male brains [lauditory]