April 12, 2026 at 12:58 PM
We present you with prairie dog Phred really enjoying his salad. 🥗
📹: Zookeeper Taylor T
📹: Zookeeper Taylor T
April 10, 2026 at 2:19 PM
We present you with prairie dog Phred really enjoying his salad. 🥗
📹: Zookeeper Taylor T
📹: Zookeeper Taylor T
Horribly Depressed Zookeeper Has Always Had Special Connection With Animals https://theonion.com/horribly-depressed-zookeeper-has-always-had-special-con-1819574509/
January 22, 2026 at 4:00 PM
Horribly Depressed Zookeeper Has Always Had Special Connection With Animals https://theonion.com/horribly-depressed-zookeeper-has-always-had-special-con-1819574509/
ZOOKEEPER: So this snake is 3.14 metres long
ME: *way too loud* A pi-thon
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
ME: *way too loud* A pi-thon
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
May 4, 2025 at 11:29 AM
ZOOKEEPER: So this snake is 3.14 metres long
ME: *way too loud* A pi-thon
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
ME: *way too loud* A pi-thon
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
The interaction between the zookeeper and the otters is just too adorable.
May 15, 2026 at 2:02 AM
The interaction between the zookeeper and the otters is just too adorable.
ZOOKEEPER: So our last snake is our yellow Burmese python
ME: *way too loud* A bananaconda
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
ME: *way too loud* A bananaconda
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
February 3, 2026 at 7:12 PM
ZOOKEEPER: So our last snake is our yellow Burmese python
ME: *way too loud* A bananaconda
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
ME: *way too loud* A bananaconda
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
Me: OMG IT'S A T-REX
Zookeeper: Haha no, that's a kangaroo
Me: T-REX
Zookeeper: Sir, it's a kanga-
Me: OH SHIT IT HAS A SMALLER T-REX IN ITS FANNYPACK RUN
Zookeeper: Haha no, that's a kangaroo
Me: T-REX
Zookeeper: Sir, it's a kanga-
Me: OH SHIT IT HAS A SMALLER T-REX IN ITS FANNYPACK RUN
April 30, 2025 at 9:38 PM
Me: OMG IT'S A T-REX
Zookeeper: Haha no, that's a kangaroo
Me: T-REX
Zookeeper: Sir, it's a kanga-
Me: OH SHIT IT HAS A SMALLER T-REX IN ITS FANNYPACK RUN
Zookeeper: Haha no, that's a kangaroo
Me: T-REX
Zookeeper: Sir, it's a kanga-
Me: OH SHIT IT HAS A SMALLER T-REX IN ITS FANNYPACK RUN
April 17, 2025 at 1:43 PM
ZOOKEEPER: Eagles can actually swoop down and pick fish directly out of the water
ME: *way too loud* They're so talonted
ZOOKEEPER: *tazing me* How did you get back in here
ME: *way too loud* They're so talonted
ZOOKEEPER: *tazing me* How did you get back in here
September 4, 2026 at 9:47 PM
ZOOKEEPER: Eagles can actually swoop down and pick fish directly out of the water
ME: *way too loud* They're so talonted
ZOOKEEPER: *tazing me* How did you get back in here
ME: *way too loud* They're so talonted
ZOOKEEPER: *tazing me* How did you get back in here
2021 zookeeper aran
November 3, 2024 at 8:36 PM
2021 zookeeper aran
ZOOKEEPER: So pythons and anacondas are part of a family of snakes called constrictors
ME: *way too loud* Also called wraptiles
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
ME: *way too loud* Also called wraptiles
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
August 27, 2026 at 7:47 PM
ZOOKEEPER: So pythons and anacondas are part of a family of snakes called constrictors
ME: *way too loud* Also called wraptiles
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
ME: *way too loud* Also called wraptiles
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
my problem with these takes, is it's like imagine if you were being attacked by a tiger at the zoo, and the zookeeper was over there kinda halfheartedly going "hey. come on now. get off him" and you went HEY WHAT THE FUCK! and the zookeeper went "uh don't oyu think you should be angry at the tiger?"
“direct your anger at trump not the democrats” buddy you are severely underestimating the amount of anger i have available to me
March 1, 2026 at 4:11 AM
my problem with these takes, is it's like imagine if you were being attacked by a tiger at the zoo, and the zookeeper was over there kinda halfheartedly going "hey. come on now. get off him" and you went HEY WHAT THE FUCK! and the zookeeper went "uh don't oyu think you should be angry at the tiger?"
ZOOKEEPER: The inland Taipan snake can kill a human in only 45 minutes.
ME: *way too loud* THAT'S VENOMENAL.
ZOOKEEPER: *tazing me* How did you get back in here?
ME: *way too loud* THAT'S VENOMENAL.
ZOOKEEPER: *tazing me* How did you get back in here?
February 22, 2025 at 9:31 PM
ZOOKEEPER: The inland Taipan snake can kill a human in only 45 minutes.
ME: *way too loud* THAT'S VENOMENAL.
ZOOKEEPER: *tazing me* How did you get back in here?
ME: *way too loud* THAT'S VENOMENAL.
ZOOKEEPER: *tazing me* How did you get back in here?
HIPPOPOTAMUS
HOLLERS FOR HOTDOGS?
HOLLERS FOR HOTDOGS?
June 22, 2026 at 12:32 AM
HIPPOPOTAMUS
HOLLERS FOR HOTDOGS?
HOLLERS FOR HOTDOGS?
ZOOKEEPER: So this female python is our oldest snake here at the zoo
ME: *way too loud* A granaconda
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
ME: *way too loud* A granaconda
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
December 13, 2024 at 11:58 AM
ZOOKEEPER: So this female python is our oldest snake here at the zoo
ME: *way too loud* A granaconda
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
ME: *way too loud* A granaconda
ZOOKEEPER: *pulling out his tazer* look away kids
Something instead of nothing
April 24, 2026 at 2:58 PM
Something instead of nothing
So this is complete bullshit. It was just a zookeeper with a microphone.
January 12, 2025 at 1:07 AM
So this is complete bullshit. It was just a zookeeper with a microphone.
me: I quit, here's my badge and gun
zookeeper: your what
zookeeper: your what
August 8, 2023 at 2:27 AM
me: I quit, here's my badge and gun
zookeeper: your what
zookeeper: your what
There can be advantages and disadvantages of being a zookeeper... ✨🪶
Artwork for Dizfoley 🦩
Artwork for Dizfoley 🦩
November 28, 2024 at 9:16 AM
There can be advantages and disadvantages of being a zookeeper... ✨🪶
Artwork for Dizfoley 🦩
Artwork for Dizfoley 🦩
Zookeeper (arrogant type).
Orange is also arrogant. My friend called him and didn't turn.
And that guy... can't reach no matter how much he is.
And that guy... can't reach no matter how much he is.
January 24, 2025 at 11:46 AM
Zookeeper (arrogant type).
MEANWHILE... I'm about to pee on myself
because i am not Australian Zookeeper Steven Irwin
because i am not Australian Zookeeper Steven Irwin
December 30, 2025 at 5:00 PM
MEANWHILE... I'm about to pee on myself
because i am not Australian Zookeeper Steven Irwin
because i am not Australian Zookeeper Steven Irwin
The day we found a Playmobil zookeeper
October 10, 2025 at 8:17 PM
The day we found a Playmobil zookeeper
My man looks like he's told a zookeeper which of the monkeys is autistic
August 12, 2026 at 1:46 AM
My man looks like he's told a zookeeper which of the monkeys is autistic