Should be renamed Sam Shutyourface

For all the good of Kahless … that is the kind of thing that would —

Wait.

Maternity leave??!

She told me she had “Shutyourface Arseholio Disease”! I assumed it was something related to her digestive tract and that’s why she had nearly doubled in size!!

What's your favorite black and white movie?

I could name three dozen off the top of my head, but this was the first I thought of.

#ShutYourFace

You are the kind of person I'd love to see get hit by a bus... #youareabitch #shutyourface

Is it not possible to be depressed if you've had too much coffee, or is my brain vibrating too fast to register it? #showerthoughts #Ihaventhadtoomuchcoffee #youvehadtoomuchcoffee #shutyourface