Kristi Noem Reassigned To Scarecrow Role At USDA https://theonion.com/kristi-noem-reassigned-to-scarecrow-role-at-usda/
March 6, 2026 at 10:30 PM
Kristi Noem Reassigned To Scarecrow Role At USDA https://theonion.com/kristi-noem-reassigned-to-scarecrow-role-at-usda/
USDA Admits Weight Loss Not Possible For People Who Don’t Like Salmon
theonion.com/usda-ad...
theonion.com/usda-ad...
May 11, 2025 at 6:00 PM
USDA Admits Weight Loss Not Possible For People Who Don’t Like Salmon
theonion.com/usda-ad...
theonion.com/usda-ad...
Old friend just laid off by USDA, 1 mos short of his probationary period as senior researcher. Brilliant person who left a tenured faculty position several yrs ago to join USDA. Bright early-career researchers also being laid off. USDA is terminating a generation of highly-qualified scientists.
February 17, 2025 at 2:17 AM
Old friend just laid off by USDA, 1 mos short of his probationary period as senior researcher. Brilliant person who left a tenured faculty position several yrs ago to join USDA. Bright early-career researchers also being laid off. USDA is terminating a generation of highly-qualified scientists.
A federal judge has barred USDA from cutting funds to help Minnesota administer its SNAP program.
January 14, 2026 at 11:42 PM
A federal judge has barred USDA from cutting funds to help Minnesota administer its SNAP program.
Welp
*USDA CONFIRMS DEADLY SCREWWORM IN US CATTLE
*USDA CONFIRMS DEADLY SCREWWORM IN US CATTLE
June 4, 2026 at 12:33 AM
Welp
*USDA CONFIRMS DEADLY SCREWWORM IN US CATTLE
*USDA CONFIRMS DEADLY SCREWWORM IN US CATTLE
Horrified Guests Begin Gagging As Dinner Host Reveals They’ve Been Eating USDA Beef https://theonion.com/horrified-guests-begin-gagging-as-dinner-host-reveals-theyve-been-eating-usda-beef/
September 15, 2026 at 9:00 PM
Horrified Guests Begin Gagging As Dinner Host Reveals They’ve Been Eating USDA Beef https://theonion.com/horrified-guests-begin-gagging-as-dinner-host-reveals-theyve-been-eating-usda-beef/
Fake. USDA. Seals.
Used by an NC meat processing plant on 83.5 TONS of meat. Produced entirely outside the federal inspection system, according to news reports.
We are pretty close to The Jungle (second ed.) now, no?
www.scrippsnews.com/life/recalls...
Used by an NC meat processing plant on 83.5 TONS of meat. Produced entirely outside the federal inspection system, according to news reports.
We are pretty close to The Jungle (second ed.) now, no?
www.scrippsnews.com/life/recalls...
Interactive: Meat recall linked to fake USDA labels
Pork, beef and goat products are being recalled after a company allegedly used fake USDA inspection labels. Explore our interactive guide to see which products are affected and what to look for.
www.scrippsnews.com
September 25, 2026 at 1:18 PM
Fake. USDA. Seals.
Used by an NC meat processing plant on 83.5 TONS of meat. Produced entirely outside the federal inspection system, according to news reports.
We are pretty close to The Jungle (second ed.) now, no?
www.scrippsnews.com/life/recalls...
Used by an NC meat processing plant on 83.5 TONS of meat. Produced entirely outside the federal inspection system, according to news reports.
We are pretty close to The Jungle (second ed.) now, no?
www.scrippsnews.com/life/recalls...
SCOOP: Mar-a-Lago sources say a favorite is emerging to lead Trump's USDA
November 12, 2024 at 9:26 PM
SCOOP: Mar-a-Lago sources say a favorite is emerging to lead Trump's USDA
USDA had to revise its late June U.S. beef export numbers DOWN 90%. Quite the "error."
July 9, 2026 at 9:40 PM
USDA had to revise its late June U.S. beef export numbers DOWN 90%. Quite the "error."
BREAKING: USDA warning: do not consume any food.
August 27, 2026 at 10:32 PM
BREAKING: USDA warning: do not consume any food.
USDA Fills Key Advisory Role With Prominent Chewing Skeptic https://theonion.com/usda-fills-key-advisory-role-with-prominent-chewing-skeptic/
July 10, 2026 at 6:30 PM
USDA Fills Key Advisory Role With Prominent Chewing Skeptic https://theonion.com/usda-fills-key-advisory-role-with-prominent-chewing-skeptic/
USDA Deactivates Nation’s Corn During Government Shutdown https://theonion.com/usda-deactivates-nations-corn-during-government-shutdown/
October 9, 2025 at 9:00 PM
USDA Deactivates Nation’s Corn During Government Shutdown https://theonion.com/usda-deactivates-nations-corn-during-government-shutdown/
USDA Replaces Food Stamps With One Giant Rutabaga
To learn more about America's gaping wealth gap, head to youtube.com/politizane.
To learn more about America's gaping wealth gap, head to youtube.com/politizane.
September 23, 2026 at 5:01 PM
USDA Replaces Food Stamps With One Giant Rutabaga
To learn more about America's gaping wealth gap, head to youtube.com/politizane.
To learn more about America's gaping wealth gap, head to youtube.com/politizane.
-Sep 30: USDA releases guidance saying they can use contingency fund
-Oct 10: USDA tells states to prepare for lapse
-Oct 23: USDA deletes guidance saying they can use contingency fund
-Oct 24: USDA says it can’t use contingency fund
-Oct 31: Courts tell USDA to release funds
-Nov 1: no funds go out
-Oct 10: USDA tells states to prepare for lapse
-Oct 23: USDA deletes guidance saying they can use contingency fund
-Oct 24: USDA says it can’t use contingency fund
-Oct 31: Courts tell USDA to release funds
-Nov 1: no funds go out
November 3, 2025 at 2:31 PM
-Sep 30: USDA releases guidance saying they can use contingency fund
-Oct 10: USDA tells states to prepare for lapse
-Oct 23: USDA deletes guidance saying they can use contingency fund
-Oct 24: USDA says it can’t use contingency fund
-Oct 31: Courts tell USDA to release funds
-Nov 1: no funds go out
-Oct 10: USDA tells states to prepare for lapse
-Oct 23: USDA deletes guidance saying they can use contingency fund
-Oct 24: USDA says it can’t use contingency fund
-Oct 31: Courts tell USDA to release funds
-Nov 1: no funds go out
TRUMP'S AMERICA: Egg prices to spike 20% this year, per the USDA
January 29, 2025 at 10:45 PM
TRUMP'S AMERICA: Egg prices to spike 20% this year, per the USDA
USDA: United States of Delusional Aggrandizement.
May 14, 2025 at 5:09 PM
USDA: United States of Delusional Aggrandizement.
That food is purchased from US farms in collaboration with USDA, btw www.usda.gov/about-usda/n...
February 3, 2025 at 1:12 PM
That food is purchased from US farms in collaboration with USDA, btw www.usda.gov/about-usda/n...
Sep 30: USDA issues guidance saying they can use contingency fund
Oct 10: USDA tells states to prepare for lapse
Oct 23: USDA deletes Sep 30 guidance
Oct 24: USDA says it can’t use contingency fund
Oct 31: Courts tell USDA to release funds
Nov 1: no funds go out
Nov 4: Trump says he’ll defy courts
Oct 10: USDA tells states to prepare for lapse
Oct 23: USDA deletes Sep 30 guidance
Oct 24: USDA says it can’t use contingency fund
Oct 31: Courts tell USDA to release funds
Nov 1: no funds go out
Nov 4: Trump says he’ll defy courts
The president says he will defy court orders and illegally withhold SNAP benefits despite there being money in the SNAP contingency fund that the Trump is required to use.
November 4, 2025 at 4:53 PM
Sep 30: USDA issues guidance saying they can use contingency fund
Oct 10: USDA tells states to prepare for lapse
Oct 23: USDA deletes Sep 30 guidance
Oct 24: USDA says it can’t use contingency fund
Oct 31: Courts tell USDA to release funds
Nov 1: no funds go out
Nov 4: Trump says he’ll defy courts
Oct 10: USDA tells states to prepare for lapse
Oct 23: USDA deletes Sep 30 guidance
Oct 24: USDA says it can’t use contingency fund
Oct 31: Courts tell USDA to release funds
Nov 1: no funds go out
Nov 4: Trump says he’ll defy courts
USDA Recalls 96,000 Pounds Of Tainted Beef From One Family
USDA Recalls 96,000 Pounds Of Tainted Beef From One Family
YouTube video by The Onion
www.youtube.com
January 28, 2025 at 6:02 PM
USDA Recalls 96,000 Pounds Of Tainted Beef From One Family
FOX NEWS: You are against people bringing in eggs that have not been-- I mean, we have the USDA for a reason. These could be contaminated and bring illnesses in.
GALLEGO: Absolutely. This is why we shouldn't be firing USDA inspectors that are actually doing oversight over avian flu
GALLEGO: Absolutely. This is why we shouldn't be firing USDA inspectors that are actually doing oversight over avian flu
February 21, 2025 at 7:07 PM
FOX NEWS: You are against people bringing in eggs that have not been-- I mean, we have the USDA for a reason. These could be contaminated and bring illnesses in.
GALLEGO: Absolutely. This is why we shouldn't be firing USDA inspectors that are actually doing oversight over avian flu
GALLEGO: Absolutely. This is why we shouldn't be firing USDA inspectors that are actually doing oversight over avian flu
The USDA just cut off ag aid to MN
They’re targeting and invading Minnesota. Cutting off all of our federal funding and flooding our state with federal agents with no purpose. They’re here to terrorize, cause chaos to justify their unlawful cruelty. Enough.
Federal immigration officers are pulling out of a Louisiana crackdown and heading to Minneapolis in an abrupt pivot from an operation that drew protests around New Orleans and aimed to make thousands of arrests, according to documents obtained by The Associated Press.
January 10, 2026 at 2:46 AM
The USDA just cut off ag aid to MN
USDA Hardiness Zone in bio
July 12, 2026 at 7:33 PM
USDA Hardiness Zone in bio
Trump has gutted food inspection programs at the FDA and USDA — including the committee that investigated last year's fatal Boar's Head listeria outbreak.
The USDA is also rolling back safety regulations to “streamline” meat processing.
How is this Making America Healthy Again?
The USDA is also rolling back safety regulations to “streamline” meat processing.
How is this Making America Healthy Again?
April 21, 2025 at 9:14 PM
Trump has gutted food inspection programs at the FDA and USDA — including the committee that investigated last year's fatal Boar's Head listeria outbreak.
The USDA is also rolling back safety regulations to “streamline” meat processing.
How is this Making America Healthy Again?
The USDA is also rolling back safety regulations to “streamline” meat processing.
How is this Making America Healthy Again?
USDA Prime Fuck Meat 🥩
January 27, 2026 at 8:57 PM
USDA Prime Fuck Meat 🥩
USDA Study Shows Untapped Potential Of Hemp Roots In Pediatric Cancer Treatment
www.marijuanamoment.net/usda-study-s...
www.marijuanamoment.net/usda-study-s...
USDA Study Shows Untapped Potential Of Hemp Roots In Pediatric Cancer Treatment - Marijuana Moment
The U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) is promoting a novel study suggesting that an often underutilized part of the hemp plant—its roots—may hold significant therapeutic potential, including in th...
www.marijuanamoment.net
January 19, 2026 at 1:08 PM
USDA Study Shows Untapped Potential Of Hemp Roots In Pediatric Cancer Treatment
www.marijuanamoment.net/usda-study-s...
www.marijuanamoment.net/usda-study-s...