michael plastics
@colve.yotes.io
several personality disorders in a trench coat
anyway i've spent the past 6 hours establishing relationships with extended family and playing mandated reporter chicken with my brother so that maybe, MAYBE he and i can recreate some bullshit that happened 24 years ago for the folks who are now technically the grandparents in our family
September 17, 2026 at 3:13 AM
anyway i've spent the past 6 hours establishing relationships with extended family and playing mandated reporter chicken with my brother so that maybe, MAYBE he and i can recreate some bullshit that happened 24 years ago for the folks who are now technically the grandparents in our family
the interesting part about growing up with an emotionally manipulative parent who develops post-chemotherapy alzheimers is the few years where you're not sure if they're still on their bullshit or actually medically fucked up now
September 17, 2026 at 3:07 AM
the interesting part about growing up with an emotionally manipulative parent who develops post-chemotherapy alzheimers is the few years where you're not sure if they're still on their bullshit or actually medically fucked up now
Reposted by michael plastics
Reposted by michael plastics
i'm going to walk into the network admin's office, shit on his desk, pick up the shit, and applaud if i have to sit through one more mumblecore ass meeting that boils down to the network staff getting ports and IPs confused and my boss being clinically incapable of shutting the fuck up
September 16, 2026 at 7:13 PM
i'm going to walk into the network admin's office, shit on his desk, pick up the shit, and applaud if i have to sit through one more mumblecore ass meeting that boils down to the network staff getting ports and IPs confused and my boss being clinically incapable of shutting the fuck up
Reposted by michael plastics
(don't say Rigor Tortoise don't say Rigor Tortoise) wow looking very alive sir
whatcha thinkin?
September 15, 2026 at 2:58 AM
(don't say Rigor Tortoise don't say Rigor Tortoise) wow looking very alive sir
apartment gym awkwardness day 2: everyone has innately synchronized their schedules so theres only one person/couple in the gym at a time, but with 5 minute overlaps
September 16, 2026 at 1:04 AM
apartment gym awkwardness day 2: everyone has innately synchronized their schedules so theres only one person/couple in the gym at a time, but with 5 minute overlaps
fuck bud it sure is
September 15, 2026 at 5:06 PM
fuck bud it sure is
thank goodness the apartment gym was empty so i could wander around the equipment muttering "what the fuck??" while trying to adapt a push/pull/legs routine to what the gym has
September 15, 2026 at 12:03 AM
thank goodness the apartment gym was empty so i could wander around the equipment muttering "what the fuck??" while trying to adapt a push/pull/legs routine to what the gym has
Reposted by michael plastics
my beautiful 3 second grey catbirds from memory
September 14, 2026 at 8:38 PM
my beautiful 3 second grey catbirds from memory
how many of y'all don't know how to maintain a wood cutting board or a cast iron skillet and are afraid to ask?
September 13, 2026 at 10:54 PM
how many of y'all don't know how to maintain a wood cutting board or a cast iron skillet and are afraid to ask?
Reposted by michael plastics
me: hi gimme a large pizza
pizza guy: any appetizers?
me: what do you have?
pizza guy: we've got fried cheese with no sauce or crust, crust with no cheese or sauce, and crust and cheese with no sauce
me: gimme crust and cheese with no sauce
pizza guy: and for your dip?
me: sauce
pizza guy: any appetizers?
me: what do you have?
pizza guy: we've got fried cheese with no sauce or crust, crust with no cheese or sauce, and crust and cheese with no sauce
me: gimme crust and cheese with no sauce
pizza guy: and for your dip?
me: sauce
September 10, 2026 at 11:21 PM
me: hi gimme a large pizza
pizza guy: any appetizers?
me: what do you have?
pizza guy: we've got fried cheese with no sauce or crust, crust with no cheese or sauce, and crust and cheese with no sauce
me: gimme crust and cheese with no sauce
pizza guy: and for your dip?
me: sauce
pizza guy: any appetizers?
me: what do you have?
pizza guy: we've got fried cheese with no sauce or crust, crust with no cheese or sauce, and crust and cheese with no sauce
me: gimme crust and cheese with no sauce
pizza guy: and for your dip?
me: sauce
Reposted by michael plastics
I'm a cute werewolf and I have my pack on and I'm good at hunting for mushrooms
September 10, 2026 at 10:54 PM
I'm a cute werewolf and I have my pack on and I'm good at hunting for mushrooms
Reposted by michael plastics
Is your jeep running?
September 9, 2026 at 11:40 PM
Is your jeep running?
Reposted by michael plastics
Reposted by michael plastics
Reposted by michael plastics
CHANGE MY PIK UP
SMACK MY BULB ORP
SMACK MY BULB ORP
September 7, 2026 at 4:33 PM
CHANGE MY PIK UP
SMACK MY BULB ORP
SMACK MY BULB ORP
stopped to record a LOT of goldfinches and turned around to a deer staring at me. i feel like a fuckin disney princess rn
September 7, 2026 at 7:24 PM
stopped to record a LOT of goldfinches and turned around to a deer staring at me. i feel like a fuckin disney princess rn
Reposted by michael plastics
September 6, 2026 at 9:57 PM
if you can't randomly spend an hour cutting up with and helping the valet trash folks for your apartment complex i can't tell you how to be a person
September 7, 2026 at 2:19 AM
if you can't randomly spend an hour cutting up with and helping the valet trash folks for your apartment complex i can't tell you how to be a person
vibing to 2012 and older owl city who wants to come
September 7, 2026 at 12:12 AM
vibing to 2012 and older owl city who wants to come
pissing myself off because i haven't paid enough attention to current pop artists, but i know one of them did an entire album with references to 90s pop songs and i want to listen to it
September 6, 2026 at 8:03 PM
pissing myself off because i haven't paid enough attention to current pop artists, but i know one of them did an entire album with references to 90s pop songs and i want to listen to it
finding a sourwood sapling is going to be harder than i expected
September 6, 2026 at 4:50 PM
finding a sourwood sapling is going to be harder than i expected
Reposted by michael plastics
Reposted by michael plastics
