Phil Ollenberg
@philollenberg.ca
Rallying around progressive politics, new urbanism, queer rights, higher ed enrollment strategy, and my dog. Vancouver, Canada. He/him. Personal account.
"Give us a call." Or, as us millennials call it, "ew no thanks, I can do business with another company."
Buh-bye.
Buh-bye.
September 16, 2026 at 2:38 AM
"Give us a call." Or, as us millennials call it, "ew no thanks, I can do business with another company."
Buh-bye.
Buh-bye.
I can't wait to age into the demographic of dude who barely steps into the (empty) train, then immediately stops and blocks the entrance for everyone else.
Ddpeewee Ddpeeweebored
ALT: Ddpeewee Ddpeeweebored
static.klipy.com
September 10, 2026 at 6:55 PM
I can't wait to age into the demographic of dude who barely steps into the (empty) train, then immediately stops and blocks the entrance for everyone else.
Want to check how busy someone who claims they're so "busy" is? Text them during the workday. If they can always respond in under 60 seconds, THEY'RE NOT BUSY.
September 9, 2026 at 3:04 PM
Want to check how busy someone who claims they're so "busy" is? Text them during the workday. If they can always respond in under 60 seconds, THEY'RE NOT BUSY.
It takes a certain level of self-absorption to be texting with both hands while driving a moving vehicle that has a "BABY ON BOARD" warning sticky in the back window.
September 9, 2026 at 2:28 PM
It takes a certain level of self-absorption to be texting with both hands while driving a moving vehicle that has a "BABY ON BOARD" warning sticky in the back window.
Just had one of those wonderful "fuck, I love my city" moments. Doesn't take much around these parts. ❤️
September 6, 2026 at 7:26 PM
Just had one of those wonderful "fuck, I love my city" moments. Doesn't take much around these parts. ❤️
Reposted by Phil Ollenberg
With 22 out of 24 Ontario colleges having published their financial statements, we can have a good look at the annus horribilus of 2025-26.
Sector-wide:
Total fee income down 43% (about $2bn)
Total income down 30% (about $2.3 bn)
Net margin went from +8% to -3% (625M surplus to $160M deficit)2
Sector-wide:
Total fee income down 43% (about $2bn)
Total income down 30% (about $2.3 bn)
Net margin went from +8% to -3% (625M surplus to $160M deficit)2
September 4, 2026 at 9:22 AM
With 22 out of 24 Ontario colleges having published their financial statements, we can have a good look at the annus horribilus of 2025-26.
Sector-wide:
Total fee income down 43% (about $2bn)
Total income down 30% (about $2.3 bn)
Net margin went from +8% to -3% (625M surplus to $160M deficit)2
Sector-wide:
Total fee income down 43% (about $2bn)
Total income down 30% (about $2.3 bn)
Net margin went from +8% to -3% (625M surplus to $160M deficit)2
Just found a new nickname for my dog tonight: Scratchy Lee Snifford.
August 30, 2026 at 5:25 AM
Just found a new nickname for my dog tonight: Scratchy Lee Snifford.
Are Elmo's pronouns elmo/elmo/elmo?
Maybe Elmo DOESN'T talk in third person, Elmo's gender is also elmo, and elmo are Elmo's preferred pronouns.
Maybe Elmo DOESN'T talk in third person, Elmo's gender is also elmo, and elmo are Elmo's preferred pronouns.
Elmo Looks Around
ALT: Elmo Looks Around
static.klipy.com
August 22, 2026 at 5:53 PM
Are Elmo's pronouns elmo/elmo/elmo?
Maybe Elmo DOESN'T talk in third person, Elmo's gender is also elmo, and elmo are Elmo's preferred pronouns.
Maybe Elmo DOESN'T talk in third person, Elmo's gender is also elmo, and elmo are Elmo's preferred pronouns.
As someone who cleans his instant pot (erm—everything) with bleach, it freaks me out there are people getting maggots because they didn't clean the lid or… like… any part.
August 22, 2026 at 4:32 AM
As someone who cleans his instant pot (erm—everything) with bleach, it freaks me out there are people getting maggots because they didn't clean the lid or… like… any part.
I couldn't find this as a GIF online, so I created it as a GIFt to the world.
The Simpsons’ Mr. Smithers injects himself with a syringe, then smiles and flails his arms. The macro text "I love boobies!" is superimposed.
The Simpsons’ Mr. Smithers injects himself with a syringe, then smiles and flails his arms. The macro text "I love boobies!" is superimposed.
August 20, 2026 at 5:28 AM
I couldn't find this as a GIF online, so I created it as a GIFt to the world.
The Simpsons’ Mr. Smithers injects himself with a syringe, then smiles and flails his arms. The macro text "I love boobies!" is superimposed.
The Simpsons’ Mr. Smithers injects himself with a syringe, then smiles and flails his arms. The macro text "I love boobies!" is superimposed.
Seeing an Indigenous nations recognised separately brings joy to my heart. ❤️ (Also why all these games gotta be in Washington DC. I wanna goooooo!!!)
August 19, 2026 at 2:16 PM
Seeing an Indigenous nations recognised separately brings joy to my heart. ❤️ (Also why all these games gotta be in Washington DC. I wanna goooooo!!!)
Malicious compliance: Bank says I cannot escalate a complaint until 14 days after I raised the initial complaint.
So I sent the escalation today, 14 days + 1 minute after my initial complaint, documenting the 6 efforts I made to resolve the issue.
So I sent the escalation today, 14 days + 1 minute after my initial complaint, documenting the 6 efforts I made to resolve the issue.
August 18, 2026 at 3:18 PM
Malicious compliance: Bank says I cannot escalate a complaint until 14 days after I raised the initial complaint.
So I sent the escalation today, 14 days + 1 minute after my initial complaint, documenting the 6 efforts I made to resolve the issue.
So I sent the escalation today, 14 days + 1 minute after my initial complaint, documenting the 6 efforts I made to resolve the issue.
I've never been "woofed" by the dude sitting across from me at the lab.
Until today. 🤣
Until today. 🤣
August 17, 2026 at 3:19 PM
I've never been "woofed" by the dude sitting across from me at the lab.
Until today. 🤣
Until today. 🤣
Adulting is replacing
your hopes and dreams
with nopes and screams.
your hopes and dreams
with nopes and screams.
August 17, 2026 at 2:00 AM
Adulting is replacing
your hopes and dreams
with nopes and screams.
your hopes and dreams
with nopes and screams.
My insurance company just made 2FA stand for "too fucking annoying."
Them: Do you want a text or an email?
Me: Text please! CLICK!
𝘞𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘚𝘔𝘚 𝘢𝘱𝘱 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘹𝘵
𝘞𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨
𝘞𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨
Their site: You selected text. Let us know when you'd like it!
Them: Do you want a text or an email?
Me: Text please! CLICK!
𝘞𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘚𝘔𝘚 𝘢𝘱𝘱 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘹𝘵
𝘞𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨
𝘞𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨
Their site: You selected text. Let us know when you'd like it!
August 15, 2026 at 5:30 PM
My insurance company just made 2FA stand for "too fucking annoying."
Them: Do you want a text or an email?
Me: Text please! CLICK!
𝘞𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘚𝘔𝘚 𝘢𝘱𝘱 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘹𝘵
𝘞𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨
𝘞𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨
Their site: You selected text. Let us know when you'd like it!
Them: Do you want a text or an email?
Me: Text please! CLICK!
𝘞𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘚𝘔𝘚 𝘢𝘱𝘱 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘹𝘵
𝘞𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨
𝘞𝘢𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨
Their site: You selected text. Let us know when you'd like it!
I'm starting to wonder if there's a correlation between susceptibility towards AI slop and mental decline like dementia or Alzheimer's.
August 12, 2026 at 1:21 PM
I'm starting to wonder if there's a correlation between susceptibility towards AI slop and mental decline like dementia or Alzheimer's.
There was a very important announcement on the #SkyTrain this afternoon. I transcribed it for everyone: PRURRAH WUNNAH THUH OHHMUNNAH, OF ZZHH RAVVAH YEHNAA MOWWUH, AN NURRAH AHWUNNA. THUH VUMMAH OHH YEMMAH, OF ZZH RUMMA WAAHNUH MURRAVA. THUH YEHAH MURRAH A NUMMAA. THHHHK YOOHHH.
August 12, 2026 at 3:58 AM
There was a very important announcement on the #SkyTrain this afternoon. I transcribed it for everyone: PRURRAH WUNNAH THUH OHHMUNNAH, OF ZZHH RAVVAH YEHNAA MOWWUH, AN NURRAH AHWUNNA. THUH VUMMAH OHH YEMMAH, OF ZZH RUMMA WAAHNUH MURRAVA. THUH YEHAH MURRAH A NUMMAA. THHHHK YOOHHH.
Reposted by Phil Ollenberg
Oh look! Another Globe op-ed about higher education with literally no sense of history.
(the value of various types of degrees are largely unchanged over the past 50 years, but sure, tell me more about how "everything is different now").
(the value of various types of degrees are largely unchanged over the past 50 years, but sure, tell me more about how "everything is different now").
Opinion: What’s university even for? Schools are broke, and degrees are worth less and less
The era of sending arts and humanities graduates into the world to fend for themselves is ending
www.theglobeandmail.com
August 10, 2026 at 4:02 AM
Oh look! Another Globe op-ed about higher education with literally no sense of history.
(the value of various types of degrees are largely unchanged over the past 50 years, but sure, tell me more about how "everything is different now").
(the value of various types of degrees are largely unchanged over the past 50 years, but sure, tell me more about how "everything is different now").
Big talk from skippy here, who was and occasionally is 47's bootlicker.
www.cbc.ca/news/politic...
www.cbc.ca/news/politic...
'No more caving': Poilievre's letter to Carney urges him not to concede to U.S. tariff demands | CBC News
Conservative Leader Pierre Poilievre is urging Canada's prime minister to not concede to U.S. President Donald Trump's demands during trade negotiations.
www.cbc.ca
August 10, 2026 at 3:12 AM
Big talk from skippy here, who was and occasionally is 47's bootlicker.
www.cbc.ca/news/politic...
www.cbc.ca/news/politic...
Today I learned I've been to the U.S. state of Ohio.
To the city of Cincinnati.
As an adult. As a grown up real adult. Intentionally. Knowingly.
To the city of Cincinnati.
As an adult. As a grown up real adult. Intentionally. Knowingly.
August 7, 2026 at 11:51 PM
Today I learned I've been to the U.S. state of Ohio.
To the city of Cincinnati.
As an adult. As a grown up real adult. Intentionally. Knowingly.
To the city of Cincinnati.
As an adult. As a grown up real adult. Intentionally. Knowingly.
I wonder what the ratio is of folks who see a branded cybertruck and go "ooh I want to shop there" vs the "ew that's on my blocklist" crowd.
August 4, 2026 at 2:38 PM
I wonder what the ratio is of folks who see a branded cybertruck and go "ooh I want to shop there" vs the "ew that's on my blocklist" crowd.
I am full of joy and gratitude for the queer community of Vancouver this past Pride weekend, and the brotherhood I’ve found since moving here last year. Pride is still relevant, it is still needed, and it is still very political.
August 4, 2026 at 12:24 AM
I am full of joy and gratitude for the queer community of Vancouver this past Pride weekend, and the brotherhood I’ve found since moving here last year. Pride is still relevant, it is still needed, and it is still very political.
Omg, I tapped on this thing once out of "wth that's a thing!?" curiosity, and now the website is like "DO YOU WANT A BUTTER APPLICATION MACHINE!?!?"
August 3, 2026 at 3:51 PM
Omg, I tapped on this thing once out of "wth that's a thing!?" curiosity, and now the website is like "DO YOU WANT A BUTTER APPLICATION MACHINE!?!?"
There may be… signals… around our house that we're getting ready for the pride parade. 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️💅🪞🧴
August 2, 2026 at 5:38 PM
There may be… signals… around our house that we're getting ready for the pride parade. 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️💅🪞🧴