Phil Ollenberg
@philollenberg.ca
Rallying around progressive politics, new urbanism, queer rights, higher ed enrollment strategy, and my dog. Vancouver, Canada. He/him. Personal account.
"Give us a call." Or, as us millennials call it, "ew no thanks, I can do business with another company."
Buh-bye.
Buh-bye.
September 16, 2026 at 2:38 AM
"Give us a call." Or, as us millennials call it, "ew no thanks, I can do business with another company."
Buh-bye.
Buh-bye.
I couldn't find this as a GIF online, so I created it as a GIFt to the world.
The Simpsons’ Mr. Smithers injects himself with a syringe, then smiles and flails his arms. The macro text "I love boobies!" is superimposed.
The Simpsons’ Mr. Smithers injects himself with a syringe, then smiles and flails his arms. The macro text "I love boobies!" is superimposed.
August 20, 2026 at 5:28 AM
I couldn't find this as a GIF online, so I created it as a GIFt to the world.
The Simpsons’ Mr. Smithers injects himself with a syringe, then smiles and flails his arms. The macro text "I love boobies!" is superimposed.
The Simpsons’ Mr. Smithers injects himself with a syringe, then smiles and flails his arms. The macro text "I love boobies!" is superimposed.
Seeing an Indigenous nations recognised separately brings joy to my heart. ❤️ (Also why all these games gotta be in Washington DC. I wanna goooooo!!!)
August 19, 2026 at 2:16 PM
Seeing an Indigenous nations recognised separately brings joy to my heart. ❤️ (Also why all these games gotta be in Washington DC. I wanna goooooo!!!)
So thank you, Vancouver Pride, every participant and every spectator.
...And thank you to every protester, because you just guaranteed we’ll have another pride with more noise, more investment, more sponsorship, and more donors next year. Thank you, protesters, for guaranteeing more queer events.
...And thank you to every protester, because you just guaranteed we’ll have another pride with more noise, more investment, more sponsorship, and more donors next year. Thank you, protesters, for guaranteeing more queer events.
August 4, 2026 at 12:24 AM
So thank you, Vancouver Pride, every participant and every spectator.
...And thank you to every protester, because you just guaranteed we’ll have another pride with more noise, more investment, more sponsorship, and more donors next year. Thank you, protesters, for guaranteeing more queer events.
...And thank you to every protester, because you just guaranteed we’ll have another pride with more noise, more investment, more sponsorship, and more donors next year. Thank you, protesters, for guaranteeing more queer events.
I am full of joy and gratitude for the queer community of Vancouver this past Pride weekend, and the brotherhood I’ve found since moving here last year. Pride is still relevant, it is still needed, and it is still very political.
August 4, 2026 at 12:24 AM
I am full of joy and gratitude for the queer community of Vancouver this past Pride weekend, and the brotherhood I’ve found since moving here last year. Pride is still relevant, it is still needed, and it is still very political.
Omg, I tapped on this thing once out of "wth that's a thing!?" curiosity, and now the website is like "DO YOU WANT A BUTTER APPLICATION MACHINE!?!?"
August 3, 2026 at 3:51 PM
Omg, I tapped on this thing once out of "wth that's a thing!?" curiosity, and now the website is like "DO YOU WANT A BUTTER APPLICATION MACHINE!?!?"
There may be… signals… around our house that we're getting ready for the pride parade. 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️💅🪞🧴
August 2, 2026 at 5:38 PM
There may be… signals… around our house that we're getting ready for the pride parade. 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️💅🪞🧴
Striking this single, long-standing, burdensome project off my list feels so good. I don't often share work stuff on here, but this is a BIG and overdue win for my unit.
July 31, 2026 at 6:33 PM
Striking this single, long-standing, burdensome project off my list feels so good. I don't often share work stuff on here, but this is a BIG and overdue win for my unit.
Working on a research paper for a journal necessitates what I call "writing fluid" to make the words come easier. Switching my brain from business writing to academic writing is a lot of work. #academicchatter #emchat
July 14, 2026 at 3:23 AM
Working on a research paper for a journal necessitates what I call "writing fluid" to make the words come easier. Switching my brain from business writing to academic writing is a lot of work. #academicchatter #emchat
Videos I love to see.
July 11, 2026 at 3:23 PM
Videos I love to see.
Was checking my bags and pockets for a missing card, and randomly this bag has two American 20s in it. I suspect my mother-in-law pixie-dusted me because I paid for something during our last visit. 🤣
July 10, 2026 at 1:44 PM
Was checking my bags and pockets for a missing card, and randomly this bag has two American 20s in it. I suspect my mother-in-law pixie-dusted me because I paid for something during our last visit. 🤣
I watch episodes of this 20 year old show and my brain melts how child-free couples who earn 𝗵𝗮𝗹𝗳 of what we do spend 𝗱𝗼𝘂𝗯𝗹𝗲 what we do on food, transport, and basics every month.
YOU DON'T NEED $150 A WEEK FOR CLOTHES, BRITTANY AND CHAD!
YOU DON'T NEED $150 A WEEK FOR CLOTHES, BRITTANY AND CHAD!
June 20, 2026 at 1:36 PM
I watch episodes of this 20 year old show and my brain melts how child-free couples who earn 𝗵𝗮𝗹𝗳 of what we do spend 𝗱𝗼𝘂𝗯𝗹𝗲 what we do on food, transport, and basics every month.
YOU DON'T NEED $150 A WEEK FOR CLOTHES, BRITTANY AND CHAD!
YOU DON'T NEED $150 A WEEK FOR CLOTHES, BRITTANY AND CHAD!
Hello and good morning from FIFAcouver y'all. The dog managed to look into the camera for a split second.
June 13, 2026 at 7:03 PM
Hello and good morning from FIFAcouver y'all. The dog managed to look into the camera for a split second.
Tonight's silly little outing was a wander around Commercial Drive & Broadway, then a wander up to Brentwood. Treated myself to the rare takeaway coffee.
Thought I looked cute serving double denim faggot energyyyyyy.
Thought I looked cute serving double denim faggot energyyyyyy.
June 5, 2026 at 4:39 AM
Tonight's silly little outing was a wander around Commercial Drive & Broadway, then a wander up to Brentwood. Treated myself to the rare takeaway coffee.
Thought I looked cute serving double denim faggot energyyyyyy.
Thought I looked cute serving double denim faggot energyyyyyy.
Watching TV in 2006: Turn on the TV
Watching TV in 2026:
1. Turn on TV
2. Wait for remote control firmware update
3. Acknowledge update
4. Wait for 2nd remote control firmware update
5. Acknowledge update
6. Stare at payment card expiring nag screen
7. Clear nag screen
8. Open TV app
Watching TV in 2026:
1. Turn on TV
2. Wait for remote control firmware update
3. Acknowledge update
4. Wait for 2nd remote control firmware update
5. Acknowledge update
6. Stare at payment card expiring nag screen
7. Clear nag screen
8. Open TV app
May 26, 2026 at 12:01 AM
Watching TV in 2006: Turn on the TV
Watching TV in 2026:
1. Turn on TV
2. Wait for remote control firmware update
3. Acknowledge update
4. Wait for 2nd remote control firmware update
5. Acknowledge update
6. Stare at payment card expiring nag screen
7. Clear nag screen
8. Open TV app
Watching TV in 2026:
1. Turn on TV
2. Wait for remote control firmware update
3. Acknowledge update
4. Wait for 2nd remote control firmware update
5. Acknowledge update
6. Stare at payment card expiring nag screen
7. Clear nag screen
8. Open TV app
Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies.
Also, "welcome?" I've lived here for 15 months.
Also, "welcome?" I've lived here for 15 months.
May 25, 2026 at 3:22 PM
Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies.
Also, "welcome?" I've lived here for 15 months.
Also, "welcome?" I've lived here for 15 months.
When you're 10 pages into a survey and you're only at 6% completion, it's time to nope-out. Either edit your data collection or offer a significant incentive.
May 12, 2026 at 7:23 PM
When you're 10 pages into a survey and you're only at 6% completion, it's time to nope-out. Either edit your data collection or offer a significant incentive.
The AI assistant in the phone is listening at the creepiest of times. Standing in a queue with dozens of kids and families and it grabbed this.
May 12, 2026 at 1:30 AM
The AI assistant in the phone is listening at the creepiest of times. Standing in a queue with dozens of kids and families and it grabbed this.
I low-key really like Air Canada's pre-flight safety video. It's just pretty.
May 10, 2026 at 7:33 PM
I low-key really like Air Canada's pre-flight safety video. It's just pretty.
Canadian Census methodology failure. From a strict reading of this question, because May 5, 6, 7, 8 & 9 are in the future, and this question is in past tense, I can only report on May 3 & 4.
May 5, 2026 at 1:26 AM
Canadian Census methodology failure. From a strict reading of this question, because May 5, 6, 7, 8 & 9 are in the future, and this question is in past tense, I can only report on May 3 & 4.
So now Scruff is expecting me to pay $6.99 per month for the privilege of blocking creepers and weirdos!?
April 18, 2026 at 5:36 PM
So now Scruff is expecting me to pay $6.99 per month for the privilege of blocking creepers and weirdos!?
I know my city (Vancouver) likes to be polite and subtle, but I regularly think these signs are too polite and too subtle to clearly indicate traffic. They're a little too high and a little too vague.
April 5, 2026 at 3:52 PM
I know my city (Vancouver) likes to be polite and subtle, but I regularly think these signs are too polite and too subtle to clearly indicate traffic. They're a little too high and a little too vague.
My birthday is coming up
April 4, 2026 at 1:19 AM
My birthday is coming up
Just got home after all day hangs with a friend. Dog would like me to believe other daddy wasn't home with her alllllllll day (he was).
March 30, 2026 at 1:41 AM
Just got home after all day hangs with a friend. Dog would like me to believe other daddy wasn't home with her alllllllll day (he was).