The Needling
@theneedling.com
Seattle's Only Real Fake News
(Satire/Parody)
Have a hot headline tip? Send it to [email protected]
TheNeedling.com
(Satire/Parody)
Have a hot headline tip? Send it to [email protected]
TheNeedling.com
Reposted by The Needling
What the f*ck
Leaves weren’t the only things changing colors today in Downtown Seattle as people walking by Amazon’s headquarters witnessed the usually blue Bezos Balls return to their natural tan color after busting a union.
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
September 19, 2026 at 7:57 PM
What the f*ck
Reposted by The Needling
Leaves weren’t the only things changing colors today in Downtown Seattle as people walking by Amazon’s headquarters witnessed the usually blue Bezos Balls return to their natural tan color after busting a union.
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
September 19, 2026 at 7:20 PM
Leaves weren’t the only things changing colors today in Downtown Seattle as people walking by Amazon’s headquarters witnessed the usually blue Bezos Balls return to their natural tan color after busting a union.
Reposted by The Needling
Satire, but...
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 19, 2026 at 4:50 AM
Satire, but...
Reposted by The Needling
Those things can't be real. It's this real? This can't be real.
September 19, 2026 at 8:31 PM
Those things can't be real. It's this real? This can't be real.
Reposted by The Needling
Damnit, @theneedling.com -- you owe me a laptop after I spotted this and did a spit take.
September 19, 2026 at 7:40 PM
Damnit, @theneedling.com -- you owe me a laptop after I spotted this and did a spit take.
Leaves weren’t the only things changing colors today in Downtown Seattle as people walking by Amazon’s headquarters witnessed the usually blue Bezos Balls return to their natural tan color after busting a union.
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
September 19, 2026 at 7:20 PM
Leaves weren’t the only things changing colors today in Downtown Seattle as people walking by Amazon’s headquarters witnessed the usually blue Bezos Balls return to their natural tan color after busting a union.
Reposted by The Needling
Free pizza in exchange for early onset dementia sounds like a fair trade off.
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 19, 2026 at 5:38 PM
Free pizza in exchange for early onset dementia sounds like a fair trade off.
Reposted by The Needling
If I have to suffer from having seen this...
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
September 19, 2026 at 8:38 AM
If I have to suffer from having seen this...
Reposted by The Needling
“‘When we saw that there are still any elementary school students who can read at a 5th grade reading level and finish entire chapter books, we knew we had to do something,’ said Microsoft and foundation co-founder Bill Gates”
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 19, 2026 at 4:54 AM
“‘When we saw that there are still any elementary school students who can read at a 5th grade reading level and finish entire chapter books, we knew we had to do something,’ said Microsoft and foundation co-founder Bill Gates”
Reposted by The Needling
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
September 19, 2026 at 5:24 AM
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
Reposted by The Needling
This is satire by the way.
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 18, 2026 at 8:05 PM
This is satire by the way.
Reposted by The Needling
I hope Seattle was using birth control
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
September 19, 2026 at 5:41 AM
I hope Seattle was using birth control
Reposted by The Needling
💀
I didn’t know about this Seattle-based satire site, very cool.
I didn’t know about this Seattle-based satire site, very cool.
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 18, 2026 at 10:55 PM
💀
I didn’t know about this Seattle-based satire site, very cool.
I didn’t know about this Seattle-based satire site, very cool.
Reposted by The Needling
FUCK this is good
goddamn
goddamn
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
September 19, 2026 at 5:29 AM
FUCK this is good
goddamn
goddamn
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
September 19, 2026 at 5:24 AM
Bezos Balls Return to Natural Color After Busting a Union: tinyurl.com/vmf7nnb5
Reposted by The Needling
Reposted by The Needling
Fuck It!™
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 19, 2026 at 2:38 AM
Fuck It!™
Reposted by The Needling
“When we saw that there are still any elementary school students who can read at a 5th grade reading level and finish entire chapter books, we knew we had to do something,” said Microsoft and foundation co-founder Bill Gates.
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 19, 2026 at 12:43 AM
“When we saw that there are still any elementary school students who can read at a 5th grade reading level and finish entire chapter books, we knew we had to do something,” said Microsoft and foundation co-founder Bill Gates.
Reposted by The Needling
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 18, 2026 at 3:55 AM
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
“When we saw that there are still any elementary school students who can read at a 5th grade reading level and finish entire chapter books, we knew we had to do something,” said Microsoft and foundation co-founder Bill Gates.
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 19, 2026 at 12:43 AM
“When we saw that there are still any elementary school students who can read at a 5th grade reading level and finish entire chapter books, we knew we had to do something,” said Microsoft and foundation co-founder Bill Gates.
Reposted by The Needling
Oh wow, a picture of a pizza with some weird scribbles near it. That's so cool! I really hope there's a way to get that pizza
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 18, 2026 at 9:57 PM
Oh wow, a picture of a pizza with some weird scribbles near it. That's so cool! I really hope there's a way to get that pizza
Reposted by The Needling
Schedule your shingles shot if you’re old enough to understand this reference…
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 18, 2026 at 1:12 PM
Schedule your shingles shot if you’re old enough to understand this reference…
Reposted by The Needling
After reading Gates's recent manifesto for MAIHT3k with @alexhanna.bsky.social I can attest that The Needling here is just reporting the news.
www.buzzsprout.com/2126417/epis...
www.buzzsprout.com/2126417/epis...
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 18, 2026 at 1:07 PM
After reading Gates's recent manifesto for MAIHT3k with @alexhanna.bsky.social I can attest that The Needling here is just reporting the news.
www.buzzsprout.com/2126417/epis...
www.buzzsprout.com/2126417/epis...
Reposted by The Needling
the pizza names could even taunt actual readers, i.e.
Hamlet and Pineapple
The Red Sauce of Courage
Of Pies and Men
Hamlet and Pineapple
The Red Sauce of Courage
Of Pies and Men
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 18, 2026 at 5:18 AM
the pizza names could even taunt actual readers, i.e.
Hamlet and Pineapple
The Red Sauce of Courage
Of Pies and Men
Hamlet and Pineapple
The Red Sauce of Courage
Of Pies and Men
Reposted by The Needling
Seattle Public Schools further added that the 15 minute lunch break they generously provide elementary school students should be sufficient for a small child to theoretically eat **some** of the pizza.
New AI Literacy Program Awards Students Free Pizza If They Don’t Know How to Read Books Anymore: tinyurl.com/sdxp58dm
September 18, 2026 at 4:47 AM
Seattle Public Schools further added that the 15 minute lunch break they generously provide elementary school students should be sufficient for a small child to theoretically eat **some** of the pizza.