SimplisticJ
@simplisticj.bsky.social
Just a Simple man with a Simple plan.
And you finna catch it queen💅🏾
I am just a girl that is chasing her dream.
June 14, 2026 at 1:38 AM
And you finna catch it queen💅🏾
Reposted by SimplisticJ
WHOSE MANS IS THIS? He scaring the hoes (me)
The second them glistened cue balls gotchu reaching out for help, I fear you’ve already lost. And you must now become bald, I don’t make the rules sorry.
Bald-a-lations ~ 5:16
Bald-a-lations ~ 5:16
June 14, 2026 at 12:11 AM
WHOSE MANS IS THIS? He scaring the hoes (me)
Lowkey, it’d have to be a combo of two people that got beef, so I’m picking prince and MJ
You have a reality show where you bust cheaters. You are asked to pick your own cohost from any universe or IRL. Who do you choose?
June 14, 2026 at 1:17 AM
Lowkey, it’d have to be a combo of two people that got beef, so I’m picking prince and MJ
Redbull or coffee? Cause them redbulls be making me feel like a drug addict
June 14, 2026 at 1:15 AM
Redbull or coffee? Cause them redbulls be making me feel like a drug addict
What’s the plan for NY if the knicks lose the finals 🤔
June 14, 2026 at 1:14 AM
What’s the plan for NY if the knicks lose the finals 🤔
It’s just funny when lord Farquad is the second most honest person on the list 😭
These four villains are running for mayor. Which one would you vote for?
— Hades
—Jafar
—Maleficent
—Lord Farquad
— Hades
—Jafar
—Maleficent
—Lord Farquad
June 13, 2026 at 11:47 PM
It’s just funny when lord Farquad is the second most honest person on the list 😭
The second them glistened cue balls gotchu reaching out for help, I fear you’ve already lost. And you must now become bald, I don’t make the rules sorry.
Bald-a-lations ~ 5:16
Bald-a-lations ~ 5:16
June 13, 2026 at 11:44 PM
The second them glistened cue balls gotchu reaching out for help, I fear you’ve already lost. And you must now become bald, I don’t make the rules sorry.
Bald-a-lations ~ 5:16
Bald-a-lations ~ 5:16
You lettin a mobile solar panel take you out… you already too far gone
June 13, 2026 at 11:38 PM
You lettin a mobile solar panel take you out… you already too far gone
Changing the name to moango
Imagine believing a mango gone out moan me
Would you rather put up with a fruit that moans while you’re eating it or a dinner that yells while you’re eating it?
June 13, 2026 at 11:36 PM
Changing the name to moango
On one hand, they will never find out he’s the burglar because he strikes on full moons and changes appearance, on the other that vampire been alive for centuries, he knows what he’s doing and how not to get caught.🤨
Would you rather date a vampire credit card scammer or a werewolf bank burglar?
June 13, 2026 at 11:35 PM
On one hand, they will never find out he’s the burglar because he strikes on full moons and changes appearance, on the other that vampire been alive for centuries, he knows what he’s doing and how not to get caught.🤨
Wanna use my coupon?
June 13, 2026 at 11:33 PM
Wanna use my coupon?
If they wanna impress me, use all the money they used for this bullshit and help the communities they destroyed
If they wanna impress me have them jump their lil bikes over the White House while dodging the rooftop snipers
The White House belongs in a trailer park
June 13, 2026 at 11:32 PM
If they wanna impress me, use all the money they used for this bullshit and help the communities they destroyed
For sure, that’s my bread a man’s butter, I would’ve had more like John Wick, but tbf we didn’t see “assassin” we saw him kill everything in sight, I took it under the guise that they get their target and get out without being noticed
I was going to give multiple choice options on this q but I held back because I didn’t think anyone would know who most of these options were so this makes me happy
Oh, OOOOH there’s only one right answer(technically 3)
Agent 47
Ezio
Altair
But Altair is the one getting it done
Agent 47
Ezio
Altair
But Altair is the one getting it done
June 13, 2026 at 11:22 PM
For sure, that’s my bread a man’s butter, I would’ve had more like John Wick, but tbf we didn’t see “assassin” we saw him kill everything in sight, I took it under the guise that they get their target and get out without being noticed
And I don’t care white inventors because odds are they stole it from a nigga
June 13, 2026 at 11:16 PM
And I don’t care white inventors because odds are they stole it from a nigga
To be fair, you go outside skin gonna fuckin melt😭
If I go out, the pasties gonna melt off.
June 13, 2026 at 11:15 PM
To be fair, you go outside skin gonna fuckin melt😭
Oh, OOOOH there’s only one right answer(technically 3)
Agent 47
Ezio
Altair
But Altair is the one getting it done
Agent 47
Ezio
Altair
But Altair is the one getting it done
June 13, 2026 at 11:13 PM
Oh, OOOOH there’s only one right answer(technically 3)
Agent 47
Ezio
Altair
But Altair is the one getting it done
Agent 47
Ezio
Altair
But Altair is the one getting it done
You mean someone who’s still in a full blown relationship? Nah
Stuck in traffic with my homegirls and a discussion had erupted 😭
Would yall date someone who lives with their baby mama/baby daddy?? Especially if they share assets together like property and cars?
Would yall date someone who lives with their baby mama/baby daddy?? Especially if they share assets together like property and cars?
June 13, 2026 at 10:22 PM
You mean someone who’s still in a full blown relationship? Nah
Because some niggas keep they mouth open, making it hotter for the rest of us
June 13, 2026 at 10:12 PM
Because some niggas keep they mouth open, making it hotter for the rest of us
I’ve gotten into 3 fights at work with customers, ain’t lost but I’ll be damned if I’m not getting paid
If you got beat up at work, are you finishing your shift?
June 13, 2026 at 10:09 PM
I’ve gotten into 3 fights at work with customers, ain’t lost but I’ll be damned if I’m not getting paid
The next move is to pipe her daughter, it’s the only logical move
A 50-year-old white lady called me “boy” on here today.
June 13, 2026 at 10:09 PM
The next move is to pipe her daughter, it’s the only logical move
Clearly they are trying to spin you clothing made from the finest silk, ungrateful
June 13, 2026 at 6:45 PM
Clearly they are trying to spin you clothing made from the finest silk, ungrateful
It’s absolutely necessary, because why are you saying dumb shit while it’s 100 degrees out
This the kind of heat that makes you unnecessarily yell at people
June 13, 2026 at 6:18 PM
It’s absolutely necessary, because why are you saying dumb shit while it’s 100 degrees out
Remember fellas, if she rejects you in public, you’re legally obligated to seduce they dad.
Charlie Says 'Them's The Rules Man, Sorry'
ALT: Charlie Says 'Them's The Rules Man, Sorry'
static.klipy.com
June 13, 2026 at 6:18 PM
Remember fellas, if she rejects you in public, you’re legally obligated to seduce they dad.
Taking back the feeling of the act like Mr jeans rewinded that nigga watching tv
June 13, 2026 at 5:57 PM
Taking back the feeling of the act like Mr jeans rewinded that nigga watching tv
Love this energy, I question the validity but I love the energy 😭
June 13, 2026 at 5:53 PM
Love this energy, I question the validity but I love the energy 😭