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turnipgazette.substack.com
The Turnip
@turnipgazette.substack.com
14 followers 60 following 30 posts
Britain's most lethargic broadsheet.

Chronicling the crushing reality of middle age...every Wednesday.

https://turnipgazette.substack.com/

Editor @tommygarb.bsky.social
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turnipgazette.substack.com
But these old XXL polyester footy shirts are classics...

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #90s #fashion #football
April 13, 2026 at 9:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
WOOOOAH, BODY WOMAN! Why has that stayed with me???

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #DadLife #Nostalgia #TV #Tellyaddicts #Bodyform
April 10, 2026 at 9:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
Our One True Love 🐶

#Dogs #FamilyLife #Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish
April 9, 2026 at 9:00 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR WANTING ANOTHER CUP OF TEA.

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #DadLife #Polite #British
April 8, 2026 at 9:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
HDM-WHY IS THIS HAPPENING???!!!

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish
April 7, 2026 at 9:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial #Zanussi #Hotpoint
April 6, 2026 at 9:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
A restorative festival of adult apathy, zero chocolate, open roads and mandatory silence.

#TheTurnip #BritishProblems #Easter #GoodFriday #MiddleAge
April 3, 2026 at 10:00 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
The reviews are in...

turnipgazette.substack.com

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #GrumpyOldMan #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial #aristocrats
April 3, 2026 at 9:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
I wish I could retire six times...

turnipgazette.substack.com

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #GrumpyOldMan #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial #TysonFury
April 2, 2026 at 9:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
open.substack.com/pub/turnipga...
April 1, 2026 at 3:59 PM
turnipgazette.substack.com
It shifts to the right an extra millimetre each year...

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #GrumpyOldMan #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial #yokel #slackjaw #Deliverance
April 1, 2026 at 9:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
Truth...
March 31, 2026 at 5:15 PM
turnipgazette.substack.com
Stick it the man...

turnipgazette.substack.com

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial #Starbucks #coffee #winning #smallwins
March 31, 2026 at 9:00 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
Got a bit confused...

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #GrumpyOldMan #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial #politics #MDF #DIY
March 30, 2026 at 9:02 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
The struggle is real...

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #GrumpyOldMan #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial #hairloss
March 27, 2026 at 10:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
When you know work is busy...where have my Sundays gone? @theobserveruk.bsky.social #yesterdaysnews
March 27, 2026 at 7:52 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
I had a 'Blue Angel' membership...if you know, you know.
#liverpool #liverpooluni #90s #theraz
March 26, 2026 at 10:00 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
New edition out today! Subscribe on #Substack to never miss us every Wednesday.

turnipgazette.substack.com

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #GrumpyOldMan #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial
March 25, 2026 at 10:01 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
New edition of The Turnip out tomorrow. Subscribe to never miss your weekly fix of aggressive mundanity.

turnipgazette.substack.com

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #GrumpyOldMan #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial
March 24, 2026 at 10:00 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
turnipgazette.substack.com

#Satire #Spoof #BritishHumour #MiddleAge #MiddleAged #GrumpyOldMan #DadLife #ModernLifeIsRubbish #Zennial
March 23, 2026 at 10:00 AM
turnipgazette.substack.com
Subscribe to 'The Turnip' today!

turnipgazette.substack.com/p/local-mans...
March 21, 2026 at 1:09 PM