#ProfilerJournal
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Slippers, psychopaths, Yoofi's journal is a wild ride! 👠 Four missing women, a greasy boss, and a very stabby therapist. Buckle up for dark humor & sharp edges! 🔪

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/05/15/s...

#DarkComedy #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
May 15, 2025 at 9:42 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Stuffed animals? Cute. Stuffed people posed as art? Less cute. 😬 My Tuesday took a dark turn with a taxidermy-loving ex-arsonist. 🔪🦌 Guess "dead art" is having a moment. 🙄

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/04/30/s...

#thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Stuffed with motive
8:12 AM — Clinic Lobby, Hell’s Reception “Morning, Dr. Akerman,” chirped Lydia at the front desk, chewing bubblegum like she wanted it to die. “Morning,” I replied, sc…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
May 4, 2025 at 1:43 PM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Seventy-two hours of hell

Sniper, my furry little executioner-in-training, watches me from the edge of the couch.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/05/16/s...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Seventy-two hours of hell
Day 1 – 8:13 PMCoffee. Black. Bitter. Like my conscience when I think about Martin Flores’ “requests.”Sniper, my furry little executioner-in-training, watches me from the edge of the couch. One paw…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
May 16, 2026 at 7:57 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
🔪 Former patient with a scalpel fetish & questionable taste in vet clinics leaves a gift for me at work. 🎁 Bureaucracy is bloated, literally. 💀

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/05/11/s...

#ScalpelSpiral #ProblemMagnet #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Scalpels and Secrets
The day started like any other, Ruby the cat stole my last piece of turkey bacon, Martin Flores reeked of cinnamon donuts and bad intentions, and three former meth cooks scheduled back-to-back appo…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
May 11, 2025 at 11:52 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Murder, she rewrote

Sniper, my furry little silent partner, was perched on my desk, tail flicking like a metronome set to menace.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/05/06/m...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Murder, she rewrote
You ever have one of those mornings where your coffee tastes like betrayal, your cat judges you with the intensity of a thousand suns, and you realize your life is a fever-dream mashup of Agatha Ch…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
May 6, 2026 at 7:31 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
The Houdini code

I never liked mornings. Mostly because the sun insists on reminding me I have a beating heart.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/12/03/t...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
The Houdini code
I never liked mornings. Mostly because the sun insists on reminding me I have a beating heart. And hearts are overrated. But there I was, perched on the edge of my black leather couch, Sniper stret…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
December 3, 2025 at 11:19 AM
thanoska.bsky.social
Seventy-two hours of hell

Sniper, my furry little executioner-in-training, watches me from the edge of the couch.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/05/16/s...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Seventy-two hours of hell
Day 1 – 8:13 PMCoffee. Black. Bitter. Like my conscience when I think about Martin Flores’ “requests.”Sniper, my furry little executioner-in-training, watches me from the edge of the couch. One paw…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
May 16, 2026 at 7:58 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
🔪My group therapy clients have issues. One's dangling bodies like puppets! 😱 Good thing I brought my own strings (and daggers!). 😼 Almost became exhibit A myself.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/05/19/s...

#TherapyIsWild #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Strings attached
10:07 a.m. — Clinic break room Martin Flores is wedged into a plastic chair like a beach ball in a vise, licking powdered‑sugar crumbs off a fourth donut.“Budget’s tight, Akerman,” he wheezes. “Gro…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
May 19, 2025 at 11:57 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
My day? Just your average Tuesday: a pen-chewing dog, a "jellyfish" boss, and finding my own clone in a death origami box! 💀🤯

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/07/19/s...

#ProfilerProblems #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Splinters and Sins
09:17 AM – The Clinic of the Damned, Office #3 Sniper is sitting on my desk, chewing on my pen. Again. “That’s government property,” I tell her. She blinks at me with her one good eye and drops it …
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
July 19, 2025 at 8:53 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Brushstrokes of death

If anyone asks me how my week went, I’ll tell them “fine.” Technically true, if you ignore the stack of corpses.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/12/08/b...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Brushstrokes of death
If anyone asks me how my week went, I’ll tell them “fine.” Technically true, if you ignore the stack of corpses, the claw marks on my Jaguar, and the lingering smell of eau-de-blood on my favorite …
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
December 8, 2025 at 9:51 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Therapy today? 💥Roy the scarf-strangler met Cliff, toaster-lover. Taser fights, flipped tables, & a very sassy sniper cat. 🙀 Scarves = banned. 🚫 Chaos level: Expert. 🤣

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/04/12/t...

#TherapyFail #CrimeClinic #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Thera-Fail
Group therapy in the clinic is always a mess. A support circle of ex-arsonists, failed bank robbers, and one guy who insists he’s married to a toaster. But today was special. Today, we introd…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
April 12, 2025 at 10:03 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Death becomes her

If I had a nickel for every time I found myself crouching in a darkened corner, contemplating the ugly truths of the human psyche, I’d have a small fortune

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/01/16/d...
#TherapistLife #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Death becomes her
If I had a nickel for every time I found myself crouching in a darkened corner, contemplating the ugly truths of the human psyche, I’d have a small fortune. Instead, I have a cat with a gift for di…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
January 16, 2026 at 9:27 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Silk scarves, psych ward whispers, and a cat named Sniper. 🙀 Roy's out, Martin's drooling, and I'm rocking a Panigale. 🏍️ Guess who's got a crimson scarf and a date with chaos? 😈

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/04/10/t...

#PsychWardShenanigans #thesphinx #ProfilerJournal #fiction
The silk noose
There are days when the world gives you a gentle pat on the back. Then there are days when it sucker punches you with a silk scarf and whispers, “Remember me?” I walked into the clinic with my usua…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
April 11, 2025 at 5:48 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Mirror, mirror, lie to me

I used to believe mirrors were neutral. Reflective surfaces. Passive observers.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/01/28/m...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Mirror, mirror, lie to me
I used to believe mirrors were neutral. Reflective surfaces. Passive observers. That was before I found a dead man folded into a funhouse mirror like a broken origami swan. The mirror stretched his…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
January 28, 2026 at 9:57 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
A chord too far

The thing about tritones? They’re sneaky little devils. Like a two-faced cat that licks your hand before drawing blood.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/04/26/a...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
A chord too far
Yoofi Akerman’s Journal – Entry #47 The thing about tritones? They’re sneaky little devils. Like a two-faced cat that licks your hand before drawing blood. And let me tell you, they’re even sneakie…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
April 26, 2026 at 8:00 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Checkmate therapy

I don’t usually write things down. Paper is evidence. Evidence gets you caught. But tonight feels like the kind of night that deserves documentation.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/06/26/c...
#TherapistLife #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Checkmate therapy
Journal Entry – 02:17 AMI don’t usually write things down. Paper is evidence. Evidence gets you caught. But tonight feels like the kind of night that deserves documentation, if only so I can reread…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
June 26, 2026 at 7:53 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
The cat, the corpse, and the Jag

The thing about murderers is they always smell faintly of arrogance. Like cheap aftershave and regret.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/10/16/t...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
The cat, the corpse, and the Jag
The thing about murderers is they always smell faintly of arrogance. Like cheap aftershave and regret. Today started with a group therapy session. Convicts, ex-cons, the occasional sociopath who th…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
October 16, 2025 at 8:03 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Voir dire & very dead

I don’t believe in coincidence. I believe in patterns, pressure points, and people who lie even when they don’t need to. “Sit down, Mr. Halvorsen,”

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/06/16/v...
#TherapistLife #thesphinx #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Voir dire & very dead
Journal Entry – Yoofi AkermanI don’t believe in coincidence. I believe in patterns, pressure points, and people who lie even when they don’t need to. “Sit down, Mr. Halvorsen,” I said, pointing at …
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
June 16, 2026 at 9:20 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Circular logic

I should’ve stayed home. Sniper was asleep on my chest, purring like a tiny chainsaw, and for a rare moment the world wasn’t disgusting.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/06/06/c...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Circular logic
Journal Entry – 02:14 AMI should’ve stayed home. Sniper was asleep on my chest, purring like a tiny chainsaw, and for a rare moment the world wasn’t disgusting. Then my phone buzzed, and like every…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
June 6, 2026 at 8:58 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Death in D minor

I woke up to Sniper kneading my stomach like a tiny, furry assassin demanding breakfast or a confession. I gave him both.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/10/22/d...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Death in D minor
I woke up to Sniper kneading my stomach like a tiny, furry assassin demanding breakfast or a confession. I gave him both.“Fine,” I said, staring at his judgmental yellow eyes. “I screwed up. Again.…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
October 22, 2025 at 8:17 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Kiss of death, cherry red

Sniper, my cat, glared at me from the counter like he knew I’d forgotten to refill his gourmet tuna stash. He blinked once.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/10/09/k...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Kiss of death, cherry red
Morning started with coffee strong enough to dissolve a spoon. Sniper, my cat, glared at me from the counter like he knew I’d forgotten to refill his gourmet tuna stash. He blinked once. Judging. C…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
October 9, 2025 at 8:39 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Jury’s last verdict

If I wanted to relax, I’d take a bath. With candles. And maybe some of that overpriced lavender soap that smells like regret.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/11/27/j...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Jury’s last verdict
If I wanted to relax, I’d take a bath. With candles. And maybe some of that overpriced lavender soap that smells like regret. But instead, here I am, perched on the edge of my black leather couch, …
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
November 27, 2025 at 10:49 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Nine lives and a bullet

By the time I slid my hand around the mug, my phone buzzed. One message. Two words. “They know.”

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2025/11/01/n...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Nine lives and a bullet
I woke to Sniper sitting on my chest, tail flicking like a tiny metronome of judgment. His green eyes bore into mine as if to say, You think you’re smarter than the city. Cute. “Coffee first,” I mu…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
November 1, 2025 at 9:39 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Howling at 3:17 A.M.

3:04 am
Sniper is sitting on my chest, staring at me like I owe him money.
“Don’t judge me,” I tell him. “You’re the one who puked on my boots yesterday.”

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/01/22/h...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Howling at 3:17 A.M.
3:04 a.m.Sniper is sitting on my chest, staring at me like I owe him money. “Don’t judge me,” I tell him. “You’re the one who puked on my boots yesterday.” He blinks slowly, which in cat means conf…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
January 22, 2026 at 10:07 AM
sphinxprofiler.bsky.social
Bite me twice

There are nights when Malmö feels like it’s holding its breath. Tonight, it’s choking on it.

criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com/2026/05/26/b...
#TherapistLife #VigilanteVibes #thesphinx #Profiler #ProfilerVigilante #ProfilerJournal #fiction
Bite me twice
Journal Entry — 02:13 AMThere are nights when Malmö feels like it’s holding its breath. Tonight, it’s choking on it. I was halfway through a glass of cheap red because apparently even a PhD doesn’t…
criminalprofilingsphinx.wordpress.com
May 26, 2026 at 7:05 AM