#VoteGroves
I’m running for President on a single solemn promise to the Irish people: A Free Therapy Owl for everyone who wants one.
#VoteGroves #CoddleNotConnolly
August 4, 2025 at 9:16 AM
I’m launching my Presidential campaign in Lidl, Ballymun at 1pm.
Housing, Education, Tackling Inequality, Policing Hyrox types and offering 3 pastries for €3 for campaign supporters who have the Lidl Plus app on their phones.

Come along.

#VoteGroves #CoddleNotConnolly
August 15, 2025 at 7:10 AM
I’m running for President on the solemn promise to the Irish people that I’ll implement a 3rd higher rate of income tax on anyone who refers to themselves as a “change maker.”

#VoteGroves #ForCoddleNotConnolly
August 6, 2025 at 12:42 PM
My deeply unserious, less than half-arsed and entirely fictional #CoddleNotConnolly presidential campaign drama did better than Fianna Fáil’s Jim Gavin’s. I mean, at least I didn’t lose a fortune on the campaign. #VoteGroves
October 5, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Knocking on doors across Dublin Central and while the cost of living came up a lot, the biggest issue was that voters are fed up with me repeatedly asking them to go to patreon dot com forward slash tortoise shack in between questions.
#VoteGroves #TheLeastWorstOption
April 25, 2026 at 7:22 AM
It’s happening!

Just over 2hrs until the launch in Lidl, Ballymun. Free slice of Hazlet with every first preference pledge!

#VoteGroves #CoddleNotConnolly
August 15, 2025 at 9:54 AM
Need help this evening putting my posters up for the Dublin Central by-election if anyone is around.

Also need to get some posters.

And register as a candidate.

#VoteGroves - Your Least Worst Option
April 23, 2026 at 7:44 AM
Running in the Dublin Central by-election on a single promise to the area: I will convince President Trump that bohs are two weeks away from developing a nuclear weapon.

#VoteGroves - The Least Worst Option
April 24, 2026 at 7:31 AM
Kicking off my Dublin Central Byelection campaign this afternoon in the chilled goods aisle in Tesco, Phibsborough.
Please come along.

Free slice of Hazlet with every promise of a first preference vote.

#VoteGroves #TheBESTworstOption
May 21, 2026 at 11:54 AM
Thank you to the hundreds of people (just out of shot) who came to my Presidential campaign launch. The buzz around the self-serve checkout was unreal. As are the offers on running socks and inflatable watermelons. #VoteGroves #CoddleNotConnolly
August 15, 2025 at 2:07 PM
Yes, the polls are disappointing. But I want to assure all of my Tonly Fans that I’m not giving up. We’ve a week until the election and it’s still all to play for.
#VoteGroves #TheLeastWorstOption
May 14, 2026 at 9:48 PM