#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I was asked to complete a painting of a famous politician giving a speech in Parliament. The only stipulation was that It had to be in the style of Picasso. I did it in typical Commons style, with eyes to the right and nose to the left.
November 11, 2026 at 10:38 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I was asked to complete a painting of a famous politician giving a speech in Parliament. The only stipulation was that It had to be in the style of Picasso. I did it in typical Commons style, with eyes to the right and nose to the left.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I was once sent to a report of a man spitting out cheap champagne in public. He was arrested for crimes against Asti spumanity.
November 4, 2026 at 10:57 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I was once sent to a report of a man spitting out cheap champagne in public. He was arrested for crimes against Asti spumanity.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I was recently in a London restaurant and sat near to Mick Jagger. An incredibly muscular Russian military lady came in wearing uniform and took a seat. Mick looked at me and said “She’s a hunky, tank woman”.
October 28, 2026 at 8:41 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I was recently in a London restaurant and sat near to Mick Jagger. An incredibly muscular Russian military lady came in wearing uniform and took a seat. Mick looked at me and said “She’s a hunky, tank woman”.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I’ve read that loads of people, living alone in remote places, are making women’s gloves and doing very well financially.
Hermits?
More like ladies ball gown wear.
Hermits?
More like ladies ball gown wear.
October 21, 2026 at 10:05 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I’ve read that loads of people, living alone in remote places, are making women’s gloves and doing very well financially.
Hermits?
More like ladies ball gown wear.
Hermits?
More like ladies ball gown wear.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Earlier, I saw a well-known fraudster attempting to tow the latest Ferrari supercar down the road at speed because he couldn't get it working. I thought to myself, "He's trying to pull a fast one."
October 14, 2026 at 9:28 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Earlier, I saw a well-known fraudster attempting to tow the latest Ferrari supercar down the road at speed because he couldn't get it working. I thought to myself, "He's trying to pull a fast one."
October 14, 2026 at 6:14 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I one arrested two vehicle recovery van drivers racing each other back to base, getting angry, threatening violence and shouting abuse. They went tow-to-tow.
October 7, 2026 at 9:34 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I one arrested two vehicle recovery van drivers racing each other back to base, getting angry, threatening violence and shouting abuse. They went tow-to-tow.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit When Morecambe and Wise died they were both cremated and their ashes were put on display. One container was bigger than the other.
Little Urn?
I’m not sure which one he was in.
Little Urn?
I’m not sure which one he was in.
September 30, 2026 at 9:06 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit When Morecambe and Wise died they were both cremated and their ashes were put on display. One container was bigger than the other.
Little Urn?
I’m not sure which one he was in.
Little Urn?
I’m not sure which one he was in.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit A professional football friend fell from a second floor balcony and was impaled on metal railings. He had a long road back to fitness and on his first day back..
Coach - is he up to it?
Me - I think he’s a bit rusty.
Coach - is he up to it?
Me - I think he’s a bit rusty.
September 23, 2026 at 8:50 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit A professional football friend fell from a second floor balcony and was impaled on metal railings. He had a long road back to fitness and on his first day back..
Coach - is he up to it?
Me - I think he’s a bit rusty.
Coach - is he up to it?
Me - I think he’s a bit rusty.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Burglars stole several violins and other similar stringed instruments from a music store. I investigated and found the point of entry where a difficult lock had been picked. It all looked a bit fiddly.
September 16, 2026 at 10:09 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Burglars stole several violins and other similar stringed instruments from a music store. I investigated and found the point of entry where a difficult lock had been picked. It all looked a bit fiddly.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Just read a heartwarming book about a woman who was permanently constipated, so her doctor gave her a new type of laxative that worked wonders. It was moving stuff.
September 9, 2026 at 9:30 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Just read a heartwarming book about a woman who was permanently constipated, so her doctor gave her a new type of laxative that worked wonders. It was moving stuff.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit When I used to work in a hospital, we had a world famous goalkeeper admitted with stomach pains and diarrhoea. We put him on a drip and drugs for a few days, and he managed to keep a couple of clean sheets.
September 2, 2026 at 9:14 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit When I used to work in a hospital, we had a world famous goalkeeper admitted with stomach pains and diarrhoea. We put him on a drip and drugs for a few days, and he managed to keep a couple of clean sheets.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit As a detective I once arrested a blacksmith for making fake designer horse shoes for the rides of the rich and famous. He was charged with forgery.
August 26, 2026 at 9:13 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit As a detective I once arrested a blacksmith for making fake designer horse shoes for the rides of the rich and famous. He was charged with forgery.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Went to see a clairvoyant and whether the news was good or bad, she burst out laughing after everything she told me. I do love a happy medium.
August 19, 2026 at 10:44 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Went to see a clairvoyant and whether the news was good or bad, she burst out laughing after everything she told me. I do love a happy medium.
I hate when my intrusive thoughts win...
#meme #gif #intrusivethoughts #intrusive #sigh #Wednesdayfeeling #WednesdayOnTuesday #thoughts #familyguy #Wednesdaywit
#meme #gif #intrusivethoughts #intrusive #sigh #Wednesdayfeeling #WednesdayOnTuesday #thoughts #familyguy #Wednesdaywit
a cartoon dog is laying on a purple couch with the words sighs deeply below it
ALT: a cartoon dog is laying on a purple couch with the words sighs deeply below it
media.tenor.com
January 14, 2026 at 8:43 PM
I hate when my intrusive thoughts win...
#meme #gif #intrusivethoughts #intrusive #sigh #Wednesdayfeeling #WednesdayOnTuesday #thoughts #familyguy #Wednesdaywit
#meme #gif #intrusivethoughts #intrusive #sigh #Wednesdayfeeling #WednesdayOnTuesday #thoughts #familyguy #Wednesdaywit
May 7, 2025 at 4:24 PM
To make it easier to identify my herbs. I have been growing them in alphabetical order..
When I told my friend she said 'How do you find the time?'
'Easy peasy' I replied .. 'It's right next to the sage..'
#wednesdaywit
When I told my friend she said 'How do you find the time?'
'Easy peasy' I replied .. 'It's right next to the sage..'
#wednesdaywit
October 11, 2023 at 6:16 AM
To make it easier to identify my herbs. I have been growing them in alphabetical order..
When I told my friend she said 'How do you find the time?'
'Easy peasy' I replied .. 'It's right next to the sage..'
#wednesdaywit
When I told my friend she said 'How do you find the time?'
'Easy peasy' I replied .. 'It's right next to the sage..'
#wednesdaywit
GOOD WEDNESDAY MORNING! Halfway there let's keep crushing it.#WednesdayMotivation #Wednesday #wednesdaythought #wednesdaymotivations #wednesdaywisdome #Wednesdaywit
July 30, 2025 at 6:46 PM
GOOD WEDNESDAY MORNING! Halfway there let's keep crushing it.#WednesdayMotivation #Wednesday #wednesdaythought #wednesdaymotivations #wednesdaywisdome #Wednesdaywit
"Why was the camel always scolding his son?
Because he was a real ""dromedon't""!
punnypeak.com/camel-puns/
#HumpDayHumor
#DadJokes
#PunIntended
#AnimalHumor
#PunnyWordplay
#CamelComedy
#WildlifeLaughs
#WednesdayWit
#LaughOutLoud
#AnimalJoke
#PunnyPeak"
Because he was a real ""dromedon't""!
punnypeak.com/camel-puns/
#HumpDayHumor
#DadJokes
#PunIntended
#AnimalHumor
#PunnyWordplay
#CamelComedy
#WildlifeLaughs
#WednesdayWit
#LaughOutLoud
#AnimalJoke
#PunnyPeak"
Laugh Your Humps Off: 180+ Camel Jokes & Puns
Welcome, all you hump day heroes and desert-loving jokers! If you're in need of a good chuckle, then saddle up and get ready for some camel-themed humor.
punnypeak.com
July 20, 2024 at 4:47 PM
"Why was the camel always scolding his son?
Because he was a real ""dromedon't""!
punnypeak.com/camel-puns/
#HumpDayHumor
#DadJokes
#PunIntended
#AnimalHumor
#PunnyWordplay
#CamelComedy
#WildlifeLaughs
#WednesdayWit
#LaughOutLoud
#AnimalJoke
#PunnyPeak"
Because he was a real ""dromedon't""!
punnypeak.com/camel-puns/
#HumpDayHumor
#DadJokes
#PunIntended
#AnimalHumor
#PunnyWordplay
#CamelComedy
#WildlifeLaughs
#WednesdayWit
#LaughOutLoud
#AnimalJoke
#PunnyPeak"
Our Librarian, @SueKilloran, has been running a caption competition for some of our Victorian lantern slides. Here's today's winner:
'Getting a first is quite a stretch.'
This slide & many more have been digitized by @HeirOxford:#punday #WednesdayWit
bit.ly/2T1oawJ
'Getting a first is quite a stretch.'
This slide & many more have been digitized by @HeirOxford:#punday #WednesdayWit
bit.ly/2T1oawJ
January 24, 2025 at 4:29 PM
Our Librarian, @SueKilloran, has been running a caption competition for some of our Victorian lantern slides. Here's today's winner:
'Getting a first is quite a stretch.'
This slide & many more have been digitized by @HeirOxford:#punday #WednesdayWit
bit.ly/2T1oawJ
'Getting a first is quite a stretch.'
This slide & many more have been digitized by @HeirOxford:#punday #WednesdayWit
bit.ly/2T1oawJ
‘MAGA woman goes to the doctors. She says..
Doctor ‘why do I keep finding postage stamps from Costa Rica in my vagina?’
The Doctor says, ‘ Those aren’t stamps, they are labels from Bananas’…
#WednesdayWit
Doctor ‘why do I keep finding postage stamps from Costa Rica in my vagina?’
The Doctor says, ‘ Those aren’t stamps, they are labels from Bananas’…
#WednesdayWit
a man in overalls is laughing and saying `` full maga '' while standing next to a woman .
ALT: a man in overalls is laughing and saying `` full maga '' while standing next to a woman .
media.tenor.com
January 21, 2026 at 7:36 AM
‘MAGA woman goes to the doctors. She says..
Doctor ‘why do I keep finding postage stamps from Costa Rica in my vagina?’
The Doctor says, ‘ Those aren’t stamps, they are labels from Bananas’…
#WednesdayWit
Doctor ‘why do I keep finding postage stamps from Costa Rica in my vagina?’
The Doctor says, ‘ Those aren’t stamps, they are labels from Bananas’…
#WednesdayWit
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit
My friend operates the tannoy system at our local hospital. He likes to say the visitors names and tell people what sexual issues they have. He works in ‘Out Patients’.
My friend operates the tannoy system at our local hospital. He likes to say the visitors names and tell people what sexual issues they have. He works in ‘Out Patients’.
August 12, 2026 at 9:28 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit
My friend operates the tannoy system at our local hospital. He likes to say the visitors names and tell people what sexual issues they have. He works in ‘Out Patients’.
My friend operates the tannoy system at our local hospital. He likes to say the visitors names and tell people what sexual issues they have. He works in ‘Out Patients’.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I visited a town in the Lake District and bought my niece the male toy from the Barbie film. It came with a complimentary local delicacy and she loves the Ken Doll Mint Cake.
August 5, 2026 at 9:25 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit I visited a town in the Lake District and bought my niece the male toy from the Barbie film. It came with a complimentary local delicacy and she loves the Ken Doll Mint Cake.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit My local farmer and his family are huge fans of a popular modern singer. In his honour they have built some comfortable hedge steps, covered in fur, for ramblers and shooters on their land.
Bad Bunny?
No, Hairy Styles.
Bad Bunny?
No, Hairy Styles.
July 29, 2026 at 9:11 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit My local farmer and his family are huge fans of a popular modern singer. In his honour they have built some comfortable hedge steps, covered in fur, for ramblers and shooters on their land.
Bad Bunny?
No, Hairy Styles.
Bad Bunny?
No, Hairy Styles.
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Last night I won tickets to the cinema to see the latest blockbuster. The Oddie Sea wasn’t very good.
July 23, 2026 at 10:43 AM
#LunchPun #wednesdaywit Last night I won tickets to the cinema to see the latest blockbuster. The Oddie Sea wasn’t very good.