New ‘Ted Lasso’ Season Aims To Teach Viewers About Shapes, Colors https://theonion.com/new-ted-lasso-season-aims-to-teach-viewers-about-shapes-colors/
August 5, 2026 at 8:00 PM
New ‘Ted Lasso’ Season Aims To Teach Viewers About Shapes, Colors https://theonion.com/new-ted-lasso-season-aims-to-teach-viewers-about-shapes-colors/
liberal capitlism can both be considered a “failure” (the system isn’t achieving its stated aims) and also “doing what it was designed to do” (the system is doing what it’s aims were to do) because its stated aims were always contradictory.
February 13, 2025 at 7:38 PM
liberal capitlism can both be considered a “failure” (the system isn’t achieving its stated aims) and also “doing what it was designed to do” (the system is doing what it’s aims were to do) because its stated aims were always contradictory.
New Company Aims To Explore Intersection Of Technology, Other Thing https://theonion.com/new-company-aims-to-explore-intersection-of-technology-1819579383/
September 6, 2026 at 3:00 PM
New Company Aims To Explore Intersection Of Technology, Other Thing https://theonion.com/new-company-aims-to-explore-intersection-of-technology-1819579383/
Breaking News
Judge blocks Trumps "blatantly unconstitutional executive order that aims to end birthright citizenship.
Judge blocks Trumps "blatantly unconstitutional executive order that aims to end birthright citizenship.
January 23, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Breaking News
Judge blocks Trumps "blatantly unconstitutional executive order that aims to end birthright citizenship.
Judge blocks Trumps "blatantly unconstitutional executive order that aims to end birthright citizenship.
Shit St Paul ICE agent aims gun
November 25, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Shit St Paul ICE agent aims gun
Judge blocks Trump’s ‘blatantly unconstitutional’ executive order that aims to end birthright citizenship
January 23, 2025 at 9:47 PM
Judge blocks Trump’s ‘blatantly unconstitutional’ executive order that aims to end birthright citizenship
I like the Tesla actions because they have concrete aims—ruining someone's business. I think we have to have substantive aims as often as possible.
March 3, 2025 at 3:04 AM
I like the Tesla actions because they have concrete aims—ruining someone's business. I think we have to have substantive aims as often as possible.
They're not even bothering to disguise their real aims any longer.
November 29, 2025 at 12:52 PM
They're not even bothering to disguise their real aims any longer.
Commission for @RomnyHasagawa
October 30, 2024 at 1:45 AM
Commission for @RomnyHasagawa
War aims as clear as always from the coalition of the fucking stupid.
April 8, 2026 at 8:41 AM
War aims as clear as always from the coalition of the fucking stupid.
Right?! The dumbest shit *so far*! Donny aims to outdo himself every single day.
September 25, 2026 at 3:54 PM
Right?! The dumbest shit *so far*! Donny aims to outdo himself every single day.
turns and aims at your crotch
November 14, 2024 at 4:33 PM
turns and aims at your crotch
Just to be clear, Lauren Tomasi wasn’t caught in the crossfire. You can see the cop deliberately line her up and shoot her. 🐷
June 10, 2025 at 2:28 AM
Historically, science aims to be more reason than action; technology aims to be more action than reason.
November 26, 2024 at 5:44 PM
Historically, science aims to be more reason than action; technology aims to be more action than reason.
BREAKING: We're challenging President Trump's executive order that aims to restrict mail-in voting.
Once again, the president is trying to seize power he doesn't have at the expense of our democracy.
Once again, the president is trying to seize power he doesn't have at the expense of our democracy.
April 2, 2026 at 2:08 PM
BREAKING: We're challenging President Trump's executive order that aims to restrict mail-in voting.
Once again, the president is trying to seize power he doesn't have at the expense of our democracy.
Once again, the president is trying to seize power he doesn't have at the expense of our democracy.
they are not remotely subtle about their war aims
August 11, 2026 at 4:12 AM
they are not remotely subtle about their war aims
Tummy and Tiddy, Dad only aims to please. #tittytuesday #tummytuesday
August 5, 2025 at 2:14 PM
Tummy and Tiddy, Dad only aims to please. #tittytuesday #tummytuesday
It’s actually very difficult to keep a distance from all this rather than be hardened to it — to remind yourself this man is a demented freak, that his followers are shitbird cultists, that his aims and the aims of his supporters are un-American and evil.
Trump is posting absolutely deranged shit on social media this morning ahead of departing for China today. Get a load of this stuff.
May 12, 2026 at 4:59 PM
It’s actually very difficult to keep a distance from all this rather than be hardened to it — to remind yourself this man is a demented freak, that his followers are shitbird cultists, that his aims and the aims of his supporters are un-American and evil.
Since abortion became almost entirely illegal in Texas in 2021, the state has seen a significant rise in the number of women who die in pregnancy or after giving birth. A new bill aims to change that.
A Texas abortion ban sponsor aims to clarify when doctors can do the procedure
Since abortion became almost entirely illegal in Texas in 2021, the state has seen a significant rise in the number of women who die in pregnancy or after giving birth. A new bill aims to change that.
www.npr.org
May 15, 2025 at 7:28 PM
Since abortion became almost entirely illegal in Texas in 2021, the state has seen a significant rise in the number of women who die in pregnancy or after giving birth. A new bill aims to change that.
War aims
March 9, 2026 at 9:01 PM
War aims
The shooter aims straight
November 15, 2024 at 5:00 AM
The shooter aims straight
A Trump regime trooper pulls out a weapon and aims it at unarmed US civilians as ICE kidnaps a victim in Memphis
June 7, 2025 at 10:47 AM
A Trump regime trooper pulls out a weapon and aims it at unarmed US civilians as ICE kidnaps a victim in Memphis
Most telling part of this rant: That the war will go on until "we decide it is over," not until the aims of the war are achieved - because there are no stated aims; and Trump prefers having none, so any result will allow him to try to claim a "win."
Hegseth: "Death & destruction from the sky all day. We're playing for keeps. Our warfighters have maximum authorities granted personally by POTUS & yours truly. Our rules of engagement are bold, precise designed to unleash American power, not shackle it ... we are punching them while they are down"
March 4, 2026 at 1:24 PM
Most telling part of this rant: That the war will go on until "we decide it is over," not until the aims of the war are achieved - because there are no stated aims; and Trump prefers having none, so any result will allow him to try to claim a "win."
Why did Trump declare a national energy emergency? Simply put, Trump’s declaration aims to accelerate fossil fuel projects on public lands and roll back environmental protections.
January 22, 2025 at 4:17 AM
Why did Trump declare a national energy emergency? Simply put, Trump’s declaration aims to accelerate fossil fuel projects on public lands and roll back environmental protections.