I am asking you, once again, to stop giving Mike Dukakis your Turkey carcasses
November 30, 2024 at 5:18 PM
I am asking you, once again, to stop giving Mike Dukakis your Turkey carcasses
Behold. The festering carcasses of American rot all shoved into ill-fitting suits.
August 27, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Behold. The festering carcasses of American rot all shoved into ill-fitting suits.
I diagnosed Robert Kennedy Jr. by looking at the TV. He suffers from stupidity, self-aggrandizement, body odor, and bloating due to eating of uncooked carcasses.
August 29, 2025 at 3:24 PM
I diagnosed Robert Kennedy Jr. by looking at the TV. He suffers from stupidity, self-aggrandizement, body odor, and bloating due to eating of uncooked carcasses.
It's nearly Thanksgiving, so I'm thinking about Mike Dukakis's turkey carcasses again
But, like, not MORE than you desire
November 22, 2024 at 5:56 AM
It's nearly Thanksgiving, so I'm thinking about Mike Dukakis's turkey carcasses again
Everybody gets hit with Body Stuff, but white women and the thinness thing is just diabolical. Like…they want y’all to look you’ve been surviving off cotton balls soaked in milk and roach carcasses.
March 4, 2026 at 3:51 PM
Everybody gets hit with Body Stuff, but white women and the thinness thing is just diabolical. Like…they want y’all to look you’ve been surviving off cotton balls soaked in milk and roach carcasses.
we simply transport the now-former ICE employees by boat to Jeffrey Epstein's island, where they live out their days subsisting on old chicken carcasses tour boats toss towards the shore
January 8, 2026 at 9:11 AM
we simply transport the now-former ICE employees by boat to Jeffrey Epstein's island, where they live out their days subsisting on old chicken carcasses tour boats toss towards the shore
showing off the machine they are going to use to shred all the fired developers carcasses the day after release
A new look at GTA 6 will be released exclusively on Netflix on August 27.
3pm ET/12pm PT/8pm BST
3pm ET/12pm PT/8pm BST
August 6, 2026 at 12:59 PM
showing off the machine they are going to use to shred all the fired developers carcasses the day after release
“This game needs more animal carcasses in it.”
June 19, 2026 at 9:09 PM
“This game needs more animal carcasses in it.”
drawing outlines around my dog’s toy carcasses
September 24, 2024 at 3:23 AM
drawing outlines around my dog’s toy carcasses
Bird Flu: Myth Vs. Fact
theonion.com/bird-fl...
theonion.com/bird-fl...
February 10, 2025 at 7:30 PM
Bird Flu: Myth Vs. Fact
theonion.com/bird-fl...
theonion.com/bird-fl...
Random old asset Saturday: carcasses
August 8, 2026 at 9:19 PM
Random old asset Saturday: carcasses
His debasement is complete. More bear carcasses will start appearing in public parks.
November 17, 2024 at 5:10 PM
His debasement is complete. More bear carcasses will start appearing in public parks.
remember when lady gaga wore kermit carcasses as a jacket bc she’s at it again: thread
January 4, 2025 at 8:16 PM
remember when lady gaga wore kermit carcasses as a jacket bc she’s at it again: thread
I cannot wait to drive my Prius jarringly past the abandoned carcasses of rusting cybertrucks littering the ruts.
April 18, 2025 at 10:43 PM
I cannot wait to drive my Prius jarringly past the abandoned carcasses of rusting cybertrucks littering the ruts.
the carcasses have shuffled onto the scene to instruct us all in how best to fear the possibility of a better world
June 11, 2025 at 4:40 AM
the carcasses have shuffled onto the scene to instruct us all in how best to fear the possibility of a better world
Fondling bear carcasses causes allergies in the fondler’s offspring pass it on
November 18, 2025 at 2:31 AM
Fondling bear carcasses causes allergies in the fondler’s offspring pass it on
Carcasses of gutted gold egg laying geese dot the landscape.
September 17, 2026 at 10:06 PM
Carcasses of gutted gold egg laying geese dot the landscape.
More advice for hunters. Prevent chronic wasting disease (a type of spongiform encephalopathy like “mad cow” or CJD in humans.) Dear hunters, stop dumping the damned carcasses
September 27, 2026 at 11:14 PM
More advice for hunters. Prevent chronic wasting disease (a type of spongiform encephalopathy like “mad cow” or CJD in humans.) Dear hunters, stop dumping the damned carcasses
God is trying to tell us that vouchers are bad and vaccines are good.
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/09/u...
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/09/u...
Bird Flu Is Suspected After Vulture Carcasses Sat Rotting Outside Ohio School
www.nytimes.com
December 10, 2025 at 4:28 PM
God is trying to tell us that vouchers are bad and vaccines are good.
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/09/u...
www.nytimes.com/2025/12/09/u...
the stories they didnt think were worth running catch and kill for involved eating roadkill, brain worms and whale carcasses
November 22, 2025 at 6:19 PM
the stories they didnt think were worth running catch and kill for involved eating roadkill, brain worms and whale carcasses
Making stock from last night’s pheasant carcasses for tomorrow night’s risotto
November 10, 2025 at 7:34 PM
Making stock from last night’s pheasant carcasses for tomorrow night’s risotto
It's close run between bottlenose dolphins (gang coercive sex, infanticide, kidnapping) and Sea Otters (drowning females and using their carcasses for sex; sex so violent that the females die, followed by using their carcasses for sex; also with Harbour seals).
which animal is the biggest arsehole?
September 20, 2026 at 9:18 PM
It's close run between bottlenose dolphins (gang coercive sex, infanticide, kidnapping) and Sea Otters (drowning females and using their carcasses for sex; sex so violent that the females die, followed by using their carcasses for sex; also with Harbour seals).