As much as I hate situations like this, they did a damned fine job putting this together. #outgoingmale #dontfuckingbiteme

Bloop! Introducing Buttercup! #outgoingmale #routecats #usps

I don’t know who to “thank for being a friend,” but this shirt is pretty brilliant and someone clearly knows that I have ALWAYS been in my Golden Girls era! #outgoingmale #goldengirls #thankyouforbeingafriend

Seven months ago, I left the right lobe of my liver with a friend. My left lobe has since regenerated to compensate. Between the two of us, we did a fuckin marathon today. #livingdonor #livertransplant #outgoingmale

Ummmm. The internet is an INSANE place… This is clearly NOT me, but watch until the very end…!!! #outgoingmale #licensedwithoutpermission