Andrew Evans
@fakeandrewevans.bsky.social
We made it. It’s all going to be fine.
Reposted by Andrew Evans
"i will shoot myself in the gut if you do not let me cut off my dick!!!"
Trump says he will cut off all trade entirely with "some nations" unless the Fed lowers interest rates
September 13, 2026 at 7:17 PM
"i will shoot myself in the gut if you do not let me cut off my dick!!!"
Reposted by Andrew Evans
There’s such an easy answer to this “gotcha” question and it’s “Sports are inherently unsafe and unfair and it’s ridiculous to single out trans athletes when we allow 150 pound linebackers to go up against 260 pound linemen in freshman football on a daily basis. Let kids play with their friends.”
Talarico: "I oppose trans athletes playing in girls' sports if it endangers safety or fairness"
September 9, 2026 at 8:06 PM
There’s such an easy answer to this “gotcha” question and it’s “Sports are inherently unsafe and unfair and it’s ridiculous to single out trans athletes when we allow 150 pound linebackers to go up against 260 pound linemen in freshman football on a daily basis. Let kids play with their friends.”
Reposted by Andrew Evans
I’m not the first person to make this observation but the prevalence of nauseating ai-generated business logos means stuff like this hits CRAZY for me now
September 8, 2026 at 11:53 PM
I’m not the first person to make this observation but the prevalence of nauseating ai-generated business logos means stuff like this hits CRAZY for me now
Reposted by Andrew Evans
at this point: carbon removal is, at best, essentially a research project. renewable expansion is a policy project
At the moment we have no real idea how to scale up carbon removal--it's a hair on the mole of the ugly backside of the global hydrocarbon industry
But we do know how to scale up solar panels and wind turbines and batteries. So that's our job
billmckibben.substack.com/p/facts-on-t...
But we do know how to scale up solar panels and wind turbines and batteries. So that's our job
billmckibben.substack.com/p/facts-on-t...
Facts on the ground
Two things matter now: votes, and solar panels. (And wind turbines. And batteries)
billmckibben.substack.com
September 8, 2026 at 11:32 AM
at this point: carbon removal is, at best, essentially a research project. renewable expansion is a policy project
Reposted by Andrew Evans
Also the Angels and Padres just sold for $4 billion apiece so any owner crying poverty should just sell the team for more money than most of us could ever really conceive of.
On this Labor Day as we face a probable baseball lockout next year, just a reminder:
Salary caps are anti-labor
Salary caps are anti-labor
September 7, 2026 at 4:20 PM
Also the Angels and Padres just sold for $4 billion apiece so any owner crying poverty should just sell the team for more money than most of us could ever really conceive of.
Reposted by Andrew Evans
his last words were “peanus horts”
Influencer Dies After Penis Enlargement Procedure in Thailand
Wealthy influencer Igho "Tiny" Ubiribo, also known as Denisi or Ego, died after undergoing a penis enlargement procedure during a luxury vacation in Thailand with his wife ... and a coroner says the c...
www.tmz.com
September 5, 2026 at 9:51 PM
his last words were “peanus horts”
Reposted by Andrew Evans
Who fucking cares. Fuck her. Also, no
September 5, 2026 at 3:27 AM
Who fucking cares. Fuck her. Also, no
Reposted by Andrew Evans
ME: (masturbating loudly on laptop)
PRINCE HAMLET: (from curtain) O, stay, my blade. The cur is at his art.
When wet he splats, I'll plunge thee through his heart.
PRINCE HAMLET: (from curtain) O, stay, my blade. The cur is at his art.
When wet he splats, I'll plunge thee through his heart.
September 4, 2026 at 8:05 PM
ME: (masturbating loudly on laptop)
PRINCE HAMLET: (from curtain) O, stay, my blade. The cur is at his art.
When wet he splats, I'll plunge thee through his heart.
PRINCE HAMLET: (from curtain) O, stay, my blade. The cur is at his art.
When wet he splats, I'll plunge thee through his heart.
Reposted by Andrew Evans
Science has determined:
- the Median Baltimore Orioles player
- the Median Tampa Bay Rays player
- the Median Baltimore Orioles player
- the Median Tampa Bay Rays player
September 1, 2026 at 12:22 AM
Science has determined:
- the Median Baltimore Orioles player
- the Median Tampa Bay Rays player
- the Median Baltimore Orioles player
- the Median Tampa Bay Rays player
Had never heard of this band until this morning, haven’t turned them off all day.
There’s Stop Making Sense energy all over this
There’s Stop Making Sense energy all over this
No album this year makes me want to dance in inexplicable, limbs-flailing, deeply awkward and fun ways like this Plum album does
RIYL: The B-52's, Talking Heads, Devo, Sweeping Promises, Ava Luna, Elvis Costello, post-punk with new wave style
RIYL: The B-52's, Talking Heads, Devo, Sweeping Promises, Ava Luna, Elvis Costello, post-punk with new wave style
Plum: Bodies in Motion
Read Nina Corcoran’s review of the album.
pitchfork.com
August 27, 2026 at 7:32 PM
Had never heard of this band until this morning, haven’t turned them off all day.
There’s Stop Making Sense energy all over this
There’s Stop Making Sense energy all over this
Reposted by Andrew Evans
[drunk as hell trying to remember joanna newsom's name] natalie harp
August 22, 2026 at 2:59 AM
[drunk as hell trying to remember joanna newsom's name] natalie harp
I’ve had three beers at SkyDome and now believe that the Toronto Blue Jays are going to win one (1) playoff game
August 15, 2026 at 9:39 PM
I’ve had three beers at SkyDome and now believe that the Toronto Blue Jays are going to win one (1) playoff game
Reposted by Andrew Evans
New estimate of Elon Musk’s death toll just dropped www.thelancet.com/journals/lan...
August 12, 2026 at 4:42 AM
New estimate of Elon Musk’s death toll just dropped www.thelancet.com/journals/lan...
Reposted by Andrew Evans
oh hell yeah
we have truly reached the senile grandpa stage of his presidency
August 13, 2026 at 9:27 PM
oh hell yeah
Reposted by Andrew Evans
August 6, 2026 at 11:45 PM
Obviously this is insanely stupid, but if you weren’t going to include sex scenes, why film sex scenes? Your own private stash?
August 8, 2026 at 2:12 AM
Obviously this is insanely stupid, but if you weren’t going to include sex scenes, why film sex scenes? Your own private stash?
Reposted by Andrew Evans
IT GETS WORSE
August 6, 2026 at 3:23 PM
IT GETS WORSE
Reposted by Andrew Evans
The only creative industry that is inarguably both doing well and doing great work right now is "new baseball guy names."
Jhomnardo Reyes is going to the Orioles for Dean Kremer, per source.
August 1, 2026 at 3:09 AM
The only creative industry that is inarguably both doing well and doing great work right now is "new baseball guy names."
Holy shit! A good thing happened!
Big news: Federal government grounds Billy Bishop airport expansion www.thestar.com/politics/fed...
Federal government grounds Billy Bishop airport expansion
The just-concluded public survey suggested strong public opposition to the project, according to a federal government official.
www.thestar.com
July 25, 2026 at 12:41 AM
Holy shit! A good thing happened!
Reposted by Andrew Evans
Reposted by Andrew Evans
Mexico just had a guy do one of these for real
![Check this shit out motherfucker [I slide one foot out from under me and fall on my ass, it’s not clear what kind of move I was trying to do]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:ltarvb3v2pb5elrsbbmweg6e/bafkreiapkw3g42mnrsjfcnrfjrwqtnd2mnkalpg4r7aupxnsodd2ldkp7q)
July 6, 2026 at 2:41 AM
Mexico just had a guy do one of these for real
Reposted by Andrew Evans
Real haters don't leap. They wait and watch. They know the true reasons for hating will be Revealed
July 4, 2026 at 7:29 PM
Real haters don't leap. They wait and watch. They know the true reasons for hating will be Revealed
First-half highlight, for me
Very funny to hear an entire sports bar in Canada boo the mere sight of Wayne Gretzky
July 4, 2026 at 6:01 PM
First-half highlight, for me
Moroccan Footballer Don’t Get Pushed Over By A Stiff Breeze Challenge
July 4, 2026 at 5:26 PM
Moroccan Footballer Don’t Get Pushed Over By A Stiff Breeze Challenge