NPC for hire
@fastpixels.bsky.social
A neurospicy word nerd who gets his little dopamine hits from etymology trivia, running far, listening to music loudly, and the odd sweet treat. May be a golden retriever in a person suit.
I'm not loving these headlines like "Ed Sheeran's opening acts all dropping out in solidarity with Macklemore". It's like media outlets don't want to write the uncomfortable truth about the whole thing, and that just looks cowardly.
September 16, 2026 at 8:00 PM
I'm not loving these headlines like "Ed Sheeran's opening acts all dropping out in solidarity with Macklemore". It's like media outlets don't want to write the uncomfortable truth about the whole thing, and that just looks cowardly.
I'm in love with the shape of you(r downfall)
September 15, 2026 at 10:41 PM
I'm in love with the shape of you(r downfall)
I can't even be mad that my brain went full spiral and I couldn't get back to sleep. Look how much I've gotten done since 4:30 this morning!
September 15, 2026 at 12:03 PM
I can't even be mad that my brain went full spiral and I couldn't get back to sleep. Look how much I've gotten done since 4:30 this morning!
My Callboy? Electric.
My box? Spirit
My boys? Beastie
September 14, 2026 at 9:59 PM
My Callboy? Electric.
Good god, caption your reels, people! I'm in a hospital waiting room, for chrissakes. I'm not putting the sound on in here!
September 14, 2026 at 3:48 PM
Good god, caption your reels, people! I'm in a hospital waiting room, for chrissakes. I'm not putting the sound on in here!
It feels a little mean-spirited to regard my dad as a cautionary tale, observing his behaviours and habits over the years to know what to avoid.
But it also feels irresponsible not to.
But it also feels irresponsible not to.
September 12, 2026 at 4:10 PM
It feels a little mean-spirited to regard my dad as a cautionary tale, observing his behaviours and habits over the years to know what to avoid.
But it also feels irresponsible not to.
But it also feels irresponsible not to.
✌️2 stressed 2 be blessed ✌️
September 11, 2026 at 11:06 PM
✌️2 stressed 2 be blessed ✌️
Inspired by this post, I want to start a #music mega thread with all the artists still putting out politically-charged music that absolutely slaps. Pls spread far and wide.
I'll prime the pump.
- Enter Shikari
- Fever 333
- Hacktivist
- Run the Jewels
- Otep
- Tom Morello
I'll prime the pump.
- Enter Shikari
- Fever 333
- Hacktivist
- Run the Jewels
- Otep
- Tom Morello
Agree to disagree. There's music out there that's pretty fuckin dope. You just have to make an effort to find it.
September 10, 2026 at 1:05 PM
Inspired by this post, I want to start a #music mega thread with all the artists still putting out politically-charged music that absolutely slaps. Pls spread far and wide.
I'll prime the pump.
- Enter Shikari
- Fever 333
- Hacktivist
- Run the Jewels
- Otep
- Tom Morello
I'll prime the pump.
- Enter Shikari
- Fever 333
- Hacktivist
- Run the Jewels
- Otep
- Tom Morello
Oh we spiraling every day. Only thing that changes is the RPM.
September 10, 2026 at 2:36 AM
Oh we spiraling every day. Only thing that changes is the RPM.
Oof. I'm done adulting for the day. Cancel my meetings and forward my calls.
Kidding, kidding! I didn't mean that.
No, I'm done adulting for the *week*.
Kidding, kidding! I didn't mean that.
No, I'm done adulting for the *week*.
September 9, 2026 at 6:44 PM
Oof. I'm done adulting for the day. Cancel my meetings and forward my calls.
Kidding, kidding! I didn't mean that.
No, I'm done adulting for the *week*.
Kidding, kidding! I didn't mean that.
No, I'm done adulting for the *week*.
September 8, 2026 at 1:57 PM
My one dog is smart enough to bring me the collars and leashes when it's time for a walk, but I still need to forcefully stop him from eating the ant-covered gummy bear he finds on the ground.
This is your reminder that you don't have to be awesome at everything. Celebrate your niche genius.
This is your reminder that you don't have to be awesome at everything. Celebrate your niche genius.
September 8, 2026 at 1:31 PM
My one dog is smart enough to bring me the collars and leashes when it's time for a walk, but I still need to forcefully stop him from eating the ant-covered gummy bear he finds on the ground.
This is your reminder that you don't have to be awesome at everything. Celebrate your niche genius.
This is your reminder that you don't have to be awesome at everything. Celebrate your niche genius.
Reposted by NPC for hire
September 8, 2026 at 6:28 AM
Agree to disagree. There's music out there that's pretty fuckin dope. You just have to make an effort to find it.
September 7, 2026 at 12:28 PM
Agree to disagree. There's music out there that's pretty fuckin dope. You just have to make an effort to find it.
The worst thing you can do to me is show up more than 10 minutes late to a meeting. I've already mentally canceled it at that point, and the personal battery power required to uncancel it and restart meeting mode is IMMENSE.
September 2, 2026 at 2:06 PM
The worst thing you can do to me is show up more than 10 minutes late to a meeting. I've already mentally canceled it at that point, and the personal battery power required to uncancel it and restart meeting mode is IMMENSE.
"Are you drunk or high right now?"
Nah, I just thought I'd stop masking for a bit while existing in what I mistook for a safe space
Nah, I just thought I'd stop masking for a bit while existing in what I mistook for a safe space
September 1, 2026 at 1:25 PM
"Are you drunk or high right now?"
Nah, I just thought I'd stop masking for a bit while existing in what I mistook for a safe space
Nah, I just thought I'd stop masking for a bit while existing in what I mistook for a safe space
This guy looks like he gets task paralysis a lot. You know what he needs? MORE TASKS.
August 31, 2026 at 5:04 PM
This guy looks like he gets task paralysis a lot. You know what he needs? MORE TASKS.
On prescriptions: there are 2 types of ADHDers
DAY 58 OF 60: I have 12 pills left
DAY 84 OF 60: I should really make that appointment to get my refill
JUST KIDDING! There's only one type, and we do both things.
DAY 58 OF 60: I have 12 pills left
DAY 84 OF 60: I should really make that appointment to get my refill
JUST KIDDING! There's only one type, and we do both things.
August 28, 2026 at 12:36 PM
On prescriptions: there are 2 types of ADHDers
DAY 58 OF 60: I have 12 pills left
DAY 84 OF 60: I should really make that appointment to get my refill
JUST KIDDING! There's only one type, and we do both things.
DAY 58 OF 60: I have 12 pills left
DAY 84 OF 60: I should really make that appointment to get my refill
JUST KIDDING! There's only one type, and we do both things.
I almost fapped to this pic.
But. You know. I'm at work. And my new office is mostly windows.
But. You know. I'm at work. And my new office is mostly windows.
August 27, 2026 at 7:37 PM
I almost fapped to this pic.
But. You know. I'm at work. And my new office is mostly windows.
But. You know. I'm at work. And my new office is mostly windows.
"Oof. The meds are NOT helping today. Might be time to talk to my dr about upping my doe."
- me, on a day I forgot to take my meds
- me, on a day I forgot to take my meds
August 27, 2026 at 12:52 PM
"Oof. The meds are NOT helping today. Might be time to talk to my dr about upping my doe."
- me, on a day I forgot to take my meds
- me, on a day I forgot to take my meds
The weekend watchlist grows. We'll definitely be watching Steel Magnolias and Muppets Treasure Island to start, probably popping edibles and being a little sad.
August 26, 2026 at 5:01 PM
The weekend watchlist grows. We'll definitely be watching Steel Magnolias and Muppets Treasure Island to start, probably popping edibles and being a little sad.
Same make and model. Only differences are the colourway and about 600 km.
August 21, 2026 at 5:29 PM
Same make and model. Only differences are the colourway and about 600 km.
YELLOW BELT WORD NERD: you can't end a sentence with a preposition.
BROWN BELT WORD NERD: there's nothing wrong with ending a sentence with a preposition.
BLACK BELT WORD NERD: I know why we were all made to think we couldn't end a sentence with a preposition.
BROWN BELT WORD NERD: there's nothing wrong with ending a sentence with a preposition.
BLACK BELT WORD NERD: I know why we were all made to think we couldn't end a sentence with a preposition.
August 21, 2026 at 12:08 PM
YELLOW BELT WORD NERD: you can't end a sentence with a preposition.
BROWN BELT WORD NERD: there's nothing wrong with ending a sentence with a preposition.
BLACK BELT WORD NERD: I know why we were all made to think we couldn't end a sentence with a preposition.
BROWN BELT WORD NERD: there's nothing wrong with ending a sentence with a preposition.
BLACK BELT WORD NERD: I know why we were all made to think we couldn't end a sentence with a preposition.
Reposted by NPC for hire
