TKFTGuillotine
@tkftguillotine.com
(he/him) Screaming eternally into the fires of the rapidly collapsing American empire.
gay ben where is my email, i want my email
September 17, 2026 at 6:27 PM
gay ben where is my email, i want my email
Wheel of Fortune is doing a Words With Friends promo week next week and despite how incredibly tacky it is that they're apparently overhauling the puzzleboard to match, the current design is so annoying to read that I'll probably watch just because of that lol.
September 16, 2026 at 9:15 PM
Wheel of Fortune is doing a Words With Friends promo week next week and despite how incredibly tacky it is that they're apparently overhauling the puzzleboard to match, the current design is so annoying to read that I'll probably watch just because of that lol.
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
Important PSA from us at Nintendo of America.
Shigeru Miyamoto, head producer of titles in the Super Mario and The Legend of Zelda series, was found to have been turned into a cocoon, with a note from him attached to the outside.
"This is Miyamoto. In just 9 months I will be a beautiful Miyamoth."
Shigeru Miyamoto, head producer of titles in the Super Mario and The Legend of Zelda series, was found to have been turned into a cocoon, with a note from him attached to the outside.
"This is Miyamoto. In just 9 months I will be a beautiful Miyamoth."
September 15, 2026 at 6:08 PM
Important PSA from us at Nintendo of America.
Shigeru Miyamoto, head producer of titles in the Super Mario and The Legend of Zelda series, was found to have been turned into a cocoon, with a note from him attached to the outside.
"This is Miyamoto. In just 9 months I will be a beautiful Miyamoth."
Shigeru Miyamoto, head producer of titles in the Super Mario and The Legend of Zelda series, was found to have been turned into a cocoon, with a note from him attached to the outside.
"This is Miyamoto. In just 9 months I will be a beautiful Miyamoth."
Recent news has reminded me that one of the biggest donors to the campaign against Scottish independence in 2014 was JK Rowling and wow, she really does show up in all the dumbest places, huh?
September 15, 2026 at 11:47 PM
Recent news has reminded me that one of the biggest donors to the campaign against Scottish independence in 2014 was JK Rowling and wow, she really does show up in all the dumbest places, huh?
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
I LOVE Bionicle porn!
September 14, 2026 at 5:28 PM
I LOVE Bionicle porn!
I'm looking at Steam Frame reviews and the thought that was in my head in October has returned which is "why does nobody seem to make a battery collar for these things?"
Like, my neck is large, plenty of room for unobtrusive batteries!
Like, my neck is large, plenty of room for unobtrusive batteries!
September 14, 2026 at 6:41 PM
I'm looking at Steam Frame reviews and the thought that was in my head in October has returned which is "why does nobody seem to make a battery collar for these things?"
Like, my neck is large, plenty of room for unobtrusive batteries!
Like, my neck is large, plenty of room for unobtrusive batteries!
Steam Frame at $1050 is a little bit of a shame given the initial price was said to be "less than Index," but I'll be damned if this isn't way better than I expected even a couple weeks ago.
Very very excited for this.
Very very excited for this.
September 14, 2026 at 5:05 PM
Steam Frame at $1050 is a little bit of a shame given the initial price was said to be "less than Index," but I'll be damned if this isn't way better than I expected even a couple weeks ago.
Very very excited for this.
Very very excited for this.
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
My FAQ, which includes questions like “am I transphobic?”, “am I in the Epstein files?”, and “do I have mold in my house?”, is prompting a lot of questions already answered by the FAQ.
JK Rowling putting up a disclaimer about having mold in her castle in the FAQs section of her website is satisfying.
She was so bothered about the mold she learned how to blur her backgrounds, now this.
Bullies are such pathetic creatures.
She was so bothered about the mold she learned how to blur her backgrounds, now this.
Bullies are such pathetic creatures.
September 13, 2026 at 3:14 PM
My FAQ, which includes questions like “am I transphobic?”, “am I in the Epstein files?”, and “do I have mold in my house?”, is prompting a lot of questions already answered by the FAQ.
Perhaps someday I will be of some value to the world. For the time being, however, I sleep.
Actually maybe that's it, anybody need a mattress tester? I'm your guy for sure.
Actually maybe that's it, anybody need a mattress tester? I'm your guy for sure.
September 13, 2026 at 9:21 PM
Perhaps someday I will be of some value to the world. For the time being, however, I sleep.
Actually maybe that's it, anybody need a mattress tester? I'm your guy for sure.
Actually maybe that's it, anybody need a mattress tester? I'm your guy for sure.
Today I scored an 81 in bowling and that somehow put me at #3 out of the five players in our group.
September 13, 2026 at 9:10 AM
Today I scored an 81 in bowling and that somehow put me at #3 out of the five players in our group.
I remember at some point hearing a group of folks say that Howard Stern's radio broadcast on 9/11 was the most impactful thing they heard that day, and it made them all feel like someone saw them.
Listening to that broadcast really gives you an idea of the vile "unity" everyone had at the time.
Listening to that broadcast really gives you an idea of the vile "unity" everyone had at the time.
September 11, 2026 at 7:00 PM
I remember at some point hearing a group of folks say that Howard Stern's radio broadcast on 9/11 was the most impactful thing they heard that day, and it made them all feel like someone saw them.
Listening to that broadcast really gives you an idea of the vile "unity" everyone had at the time.
Listening to that broadcast really gives you an idea of the vile "unity" everyone had at the time.
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
Pretending the days after Sept. 11, 2001 were some kind of gauzy Hallmark special when we came together as a country is nauseating and ahistorical. The country went completely insane and has not recovered
September 11, 2026 at 2:49 PM
Pretending the days after Sept. 11, 2001 were some kind of gauzy Hallmark special when we came together as a country is nauseating and ahistorical. The country went completely insane and has not recovered
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
people on bluesky simply have no concept of how universal this is among, like, normal people gen z and younger
Middle school children in my little liberal oasis were apparently wishing each other “Happy Kirkaversary” today so that’s how it’s going, if you wanted to know.
September 10, 2026 at 10:52 PM
people on bluesky simply have no concept of how universal this is among, like, normal people gen z and younger
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
i want to apologize again to everyone who may have heeded my advice, did not get wrongfully terminated from their job, and as such did not score a once in a lifetime lawsuit payout. i will spend the day in reflection be better in the future about not discouraging my followers from getting that bag
if that news is true, don't say anything you wouldn't want to see screenshotted and spread all over right wing media
September 10, 2026 at 1:29 PM
i want to apologize again to everyone who may have heeded my advice, did not get wrongfully terminated from their job, and as such did not score a once in a lifetime lawsuit payout. i will spend the day in reflection be better in the future about not discouraging my followers from getting that bag
I love suddenly learning who someone is via a royally stupid opinion, it's great.
September 10, 2026 at 9:39 PM
I love suddenly learning who someone is via a royally stupid opinion, it's great.
Lot of folks getting upset at the Apple Watch rewind feature.
Given Apple's track record I'm willing to believe their privacy claims, I just can't actually understand who this is for? In literally every situation this is more awkward than just asking someone to repeat themselves.
Wild own goal.
Given Apple's track record I'm willing to believe their privacy claims, I just can't actually understand who this is for? In literally every situation this is more awkward than just asking someone to repeat themselves.
Wild own goal.
September 10, 2026 at 7:25 AM
Lot of folks getting upset at the Apple Watch rewind feature.
Given Apple's track record I'm willing to believe their privacy claims, I just can't actually understand who this is for? In literally every situation this is more awkward than just asking someone to repeat themselves.
Wild own goal.
Given Apple's track record I'm willing to believe their privacy claims, I just can't actually understand who this is for? In literally every situation this is more awkward than just asking someone to repeat themselves.
Wild own goal.
Metroid would be fun if they'd make the controls not suck and let me ignore the inevitable litany of checkpoints but they're almost certainly not going to do that so I guess I'll mod it in like six years' time.
But hey! At least under-display selfie cameras in phones are making a comeback!
But hey! At least under-display selfie cameras in phones are making a comeback!
September 10, 2026 at 6:31 AM
Metroid would be fun if they'd make the controls not suck and let me ignore the inevitable litany of checkpoints but they're almost certainly not going to do that so I guess I'll mod it in like six years' time.
But hey! At least under-display selfie cameras in phones are making a comeback!
But hey! At least under-display selfie cameras in phones are making a comeback!
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
Oh that's us swearing on Dutch TV
September 9, 2026 at 8:16 AM
Oh that's us swearing on Dutch TV
I've finally watched the OOT Direct now and I think I'm even more confused? Seriously, why would you not do Majora's Mask instead? *That's* the game whose remake was poorly received and which could've used a more straightforward update. People already liked OOT3D! This is completely unnecessary!
September 9, 2026 at 10:11 AM
I've finally watched the OOT Direct now and I think I'm even more confused? Seriously, why would you not do Majora's Mask instead? *That's* the game whose remake was poorly received and which could've used a more straightforward update. People already liked OOT3D! This is completely unnecessary!
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
CDC Successfully Eradicates Children https://theonion.com/cdc-successfully-eradicates-children/
September 8, 2026 at 10:00 PM
CDC Successfully Eradicates Children https://theonion.com/cdc-successfully-eradicates-children/
Broke: Ocarina of Time remake is bad because it doesn't look exactly like the N64 game.
Woke: Ocarina of Time remake is bad because 3D Zelda is and has always been dreadfully anti-fun.
Woke: Ocarina of Time remake is bad because 3D Zelda is and has always been dreadfully anti-fun.
September 8, 2026 at 7:40 PM
Broke: Ocarina of Time remake is bad because it doesn't look exactly like the N64 game.
Woke: Ocarina of Time remake is bad because 3D Zelda is and has always been dreadfully anti-fun.
Woke: Ocarina of Time remake is bad because 3D Zelda is and has always been dreadfully anti-fun.
Still think it was pretty bold of Crazy Frog to make his debut song about his ring ding ding.
September 8, 2026 at 9:36 AM
Still think it was pretty bold of Crazy Frog to make his debut song about his ring ding ding.
Reposted by TKFTGuillotine
CHANGE MY PIK UP
SMACK MY BULB ORP
SMACK MY BULB ORP
September 7, 2026 at 4:33 PM
CHANGE MY PIK UP
SMACK MY BULB ORP
SMACK MY BULB ORP