MothManatee
@mothmanatee.bsky.social
Reposted by MothManatee
I keep seeing videos of a guy who catches crabs and lobsters, cracks all the barnacles off them, puts a shrimp in their claws and throws them back. can you imagine. abducted by aliens but they just give you a spa day and hand you two hot dogs and let you go
September 16, 2026 at 9:33 PM
I keep seeing videos of a guy who catches crabs and lobsters, cracks all the barnacles off them, puts a shrimp in their claws and throws them back. can you imagine. abducted by aliens but they just give you a spa day and hand you two hot dogs and let you go
weird that it happened twice, etc.
The moral of the story is never to trust the son of a major real estate tycoon who never had a real job until discovering reactionary politics send post
September 11, 2026 at 5:46 PM
weird that it happened twice, etc.
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"I have Schwimmer's ear," David Schwimmer's killer taunts police
March 2, 2024 at 4:31 PM
"I have Schwimmer's ear," David Schwimmer's killer taunts police
Reposted by MothManatee
Hijacker: Everyone stop talking. I am armed and I am taking control of this plane.
Guy from the Netherlands: Wow, in Netherlands we just purchase a plane if we want one. But typically we will bike somewhere
Guy who has been to Japan once: In Japan planes are rarely hijacked. It's a cultural taboo
Guy from the Netherlands: Wow, in Netherlands we just purchase a plane if we want one. But typically we will bike somewhere
Guy who has been to Japan once: In Japan planes are rarely hijacked. It's a cultural taboo
August 27, 2026 at 2:02 AM
Hijacker: Everyone stop talking. I am armed and I am taking control of this plane.
Guy from the Netherlands: Wow, in Netherlands we just purchase a plane if we want one. But typically we will bike somewhere
Guy who has been to Japan once: In Japan planes are rarely hijacked. It's a cultural taboo
Guy from the Netherlands: Wow, in Netherlands we just purchase a plane if we want one. But typically we will bike somewhere
Guy who has been to Japan once: In Japan planes are rarely hijacked. It's a cultural taboo
Reposted by MothManatee
Reposted by MothManatee
Reposted by MothManatee
“Commas are important”
August 12, 2026 at 8:07 PM
“Commas are important”
Reposted by MothManatee
eating fish you catch? call that bass to mouth
August 1, 2023 at 3:32 PM
eating fish you catch? call that bass to mouth
Reposted by MothManatee
Each of the 7 executioners in the firing line squad decided independently it would be hilarious if one of them shoots me in the balls this time.
July 31, 2026 at 3:20 PM
Each of the 7 executioners in the firing line squad decided independently it would be hilarious if one of them shoots me in the balls this time.
Reposted by MothManatee
No Rest IV:
The Wicked
The Wicked
July 28, 2026 at 5:04 AM
No Rest IV:
The Wicked
The Wicked
Reposted by MothManatee
Reposted by MothManatee
Guy who I used to slip n slide with saw me at the grocery store and asked me how my “sabbatical” was going. Looks like it’s about time I soap up and remind these drystanders why they call me The Hagfish.
July 16, 2026 at 10:53 PM
Guy who I used to slip n slide with saw me at the grocery store and asked me how my “sabbatical” was going. Looks like it’s about time I soap up and remind these drystanders why they call me The Hagfish.
Reposted by MothManatee
gotta find a way to say Air Quality Index Over 1000 that doesn't make it sound like the greatest air you are ever likely to have an opportunity to breathe. maybe call it the Air Garbage Index. no chance i'm going outside if there's a thousand air garbage. although, one man's trash....
July 16, 2026 at 4:31 AM
gotta find a way to say Air Quality Index Over 1000 that doesn't make it sound like the greatest air you are ever likely to have an opportunity to breathe. maybe call it the Air Garbage Index. no chance i'm going outside if there's a thousand air garbage. although, one man's trash....
Reposted by MothManatee
this is the official scooby doo account
July 5, 2026 at 10:36 PM
this is the official scooby doo account
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you finally ask your crush out on a date and she says yes! couple hours later you find a scratch ticket on the ground and holy shit!! you won ten grand!!! then Neo frees mankind from the Matrix
January 11, 2025 at 12:22 AM
you finally ask your crush out on a date and she says yes! couple hours later you find a scratch ticket on the ground and holy shit!! you won ten grand!!! then Neo frees mankind from the Matrix
has any human being ever looked more aggressively swiss than murat yakin
July 3, 2026 at 3:35 AM
has any human being ever looked more aggressively swiss than murat yakin
Reposted by MothManatee
in space no one can hear you cream
June 30, 2024 at 3:09 PM
in space no one can hear you cream
Reposted by MothManatee
RETIREE FROM VANCOUVER WHO ROTS THEIR BRAIN ON RESIST CONTENT EIGHTEEN HOURS A DAY: These delusional USians really believe the world will come crawling back when (t)Rump is out of office
FRENCHMAN IN TEXAS FOR THE WORLD CUP TRYING BRISKET FOR THE FIRST TIME: Ze light of God ‘az opeened my eyes
FRENCHMAN IN TEXAS FOR THE WORLD CUP TRYING BRISKET FOR THE FIRST TIME: Ze light of God ‘az opeened my eyes
June 25, 2026 at 4:15 AM
RETIREE FROM VANCOUVER WHO ROTS THEIR BRAIN ON RESIST CONTENT EIGHTEEN HOURS A DAY: These delusional USians really believe the world will come crawling back when (t)Rump is out of office
FRENCHMAN IN TEXAS FOR THE WORLD CUP TRYING BRISKET FOR THE FIRST TIME: Ze light of God ‘az opeened my eyes
FRENCHMAN IN TEXAS FOR THE WORLD CUP TRYING BRISKET FOR THE FIRST TIME: Ze light of God ‘az opeened my eyes
Reposted by MothManatee
Walking room to room through the sanitarium saying "grown ass man losing to a single celled organism" and each tuberculosis patient miraculously getting better
June 24, 2026 at 12:38 AM
Walking room to room through the sanitarium saying "grown ass man losing to a single celled organism" and each tuberculosis patient miraculously getting better
Reposted by MothManatee
Roommate thinks I didn’t notice he ate my swedish meatballs, but I wasn’t björn yesterday
June 23, 2026 at 2:07 AM
Roommate thinks I didn’t notice he ate my swedish meatballs, but I wasn’t björn yesterday
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nothing worse than picking up a book at a free little library called like, "The Silly Shoe," and then halfway through you find out the silly shoe was on jesus's foot at the crucifixion
September 30, 2024 at 5:24 PM
nothing worse than picking up a book at a free little library called like, "The Silly Shoe," and then halfway through you find out the silly shoe was on jesus's foot at the crucifixion
Reposted by MothManatee
by today's standards conservatives were actually pretty normal about the teletubbies
June 12, 2026 at 2:04 AM
by today's standards conservatives were actually pretty normal about the teletubbies
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I am once again begging, praying, weeping for lists of written instructions rather than videos. I do not want to watch your two minute video in the hope of catching the two seconds where you whizz past what goddamn menu the thing is under. Write. It. Down.
May 18, 2026 at 8:04 AM
I am once again begging, praying, weeping for lists of written instructions rather than videos. I do not want to watch your two minute video in the hope of catching the two seconds where you whizz past what goddamn menu the thing is under. Write. It. Down.
Reposted by MothManatee
Cilia Murphy. he's just gliding across the floor with millions of tiny hairs
March 31, 2026 at 2:41 AM
Cilia Murphy. he's just gliding across the floor with millions of tiny hairs
Reposted by MothManatee
![david attenborough: [mumbling] skip. i don't like this animal. skip it.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:ciyivse6vsi273tcz6w2nvep/bafkreigrd7kushrlt5vdhsmayfdgwwwmr4spi4pminony6ik2iqwqfsu2a)