1. Ember from a candle I blew out flying directly into my eye
2. Cutting open my left index finger with a breadknife
3. Baseball to the eye during little league
4. Walking with a bruised bone in my ankle
5. Shading section of my first tattoo
2. Cutting open my left index finger with a breadknife
3. Baseball to the eye during little league
4. Walking with a bruised bone in my ankle
5. Shading section of my first tattoo
1. Migraine caused by a high dose of hydroxychloroquine.
2. A different migraine
3. Another migraine
4. Yeah, this one's a migraine too.
5. You guessed it: the aftermath of falling down the stairs.
2. A different migraine
3. Another migraine
4. Yeah, this one's a migraine too.
5. You guessed it: the aftermath of falling down the stairs.
I’m thinking the next engagement-bait trend could be a Top-5 of the worst pains you’ve ever been in.
Here’s mine:
1) Heparin SubQ injection
2) Wisdom Teef Removal
3) That time with Sophie and the buckle of the belt
4) Leuprolin IM injection
5) That other time with Sophie and the belt
Here’s mine:
1) Heparin SubQ injection
2) Wisdom Teef Removal
3) That time with Sophie and the buckle of the belt
4) Leuprolin IM injection
5) That other time with Sophie and the belt
November 6, 2026 at 1:11 AM
1. Ember from a candle I blew out flying directly into my eye
2. Cutting open my left index finger with a breadknife
3. Baseball to the eye during little league
4. Walking with a bruised bone in my ankle
5. Shading section of my first tattoo
2. Cutting open my left index finger with a breadknife
3. Baseball to the eye during little league
4. Walking with a bruised bone in my ankle
5. Shading section of my first tattoo
Mercer Culinary M23210 Millennia Black Handle, 10-Inch Wide Wavy Edge, Bread Knife#breadknife#kitchenknife#MercerCulinary#Millennia#JapaneseSteel
Mercer Culinary M23210 Millennia Black Handle, 10-Inch Wide Wavy Edge, Bread Knife
www.amazon.com
November 7, 2026 at 2:13 PM
Mercer Culinary M23210 Millennia Black Handle, 10-Inch Wide Wavy Edge, Bread Knife#breadknife#kitchenknife#MercerCulinary#Millennia#JapaneseSteel
Waring Commercial WEK200 Cordless Rechargeable Electric Knife w/Bread and Carving Blades, Includes Case, 120V, 5-15 Phase Plug, Black #cordless #carving #breadknife #rechargeable
Waring Commercial WEK200 Cordless Rechargeable Electric Knife w/Bread and Carving Blades, Includes Case, 120V, 5-15 Phase Plug, Black
www.amazon.com
November 7, 2026 at 2:14 AM
Waring Commercial WEK200 Cordless Rechargeable Electric Knife w/Bread and Carving Blades, Includes Case, 120V, 5-15 Phase Plug, Black #cordless #carving #breadknife #rechargeable
I dunno who designed this fucking kitty litter bucket but I sliced my fucking hand open trying to get the plastic seals off it. It took a fucking breadknife to get into eventually. I really miss the A&H bags. Easier to get into, less waste.
Fuck you, Purina.
Fuck you, Purina.
November 6, 2026 at 12:24 PM
I dunno who designed this fucking kitty litter bucket but I sliced my fucking hand open trying to get the plastic seals off it. It took a fucking breadknife to get into eventually. I really miss the A&H bags. Easier to get into, less waste.
Fuck you, Purina.
Fuck you, Purina.
The breadknife is (nominally) an Arsenal fan. In fact, so nominally, she didnt even manage to muster a "Mickey Mouse cup".
October 28, 2026 at 9:29 AM
The breadknife is (nominally) an Arsenal fan. In fact, so nominally, she didnt even manage to muster a "Mickey Mouse cup".
I get a breadknife for opening a big package and start very obviously opening said package to make sure the contents are not damaged
Danish Postie "that´s illegal and you are threatening me"
🙄
Danish Postie "that´s illegal and you are threatening me"
🙄
October 25, 2026 at 10:32 AM
I get a breadknife for opening a big package and start very obviously opening said package to make sure the contents are not damaged
Danish Postie "that´s illegal and you are threatening me"
🙄
Danish Postie "that´s illegal and you are threatening me"
🙄
"Don't cover up your scars"
I have one on my thumb from a breadknife incident
youtu.be/QgDRBHgxICk?...
I have one on my thumb from a breadknife incident
youtu.be/QgDRBHgxICk?...
Witness - Scars
YouTube video by CDA1
youtu.be
October 22, 2026 at 6:13 AM
"Don't cover up your scars"
I have one on my thumb from a breadknife incident
youtu.be/QgDRBHgxICk?...
I have one on my thumb from a breadknife incident
youtu.be/QgDRBHgxICk?...
Many thanks to all the amazing performers and audience members who came to a wonderful night of music at the Breadknife Music Open Mic/Showcase at the Bicycle Shop last night. What a night!
The next one will be Thursday 19th November. Save the date! #Norwich
The next one will be Thursday 19th November. Save the date! #Norwich
October 23, 2026 at 9:04 AM
Many thanks to all the amazing performers and audience members who came to a wonderful night of music at the Breadknife Music Open Mic/Showcase at the Bicycle Shop last night. What a night!
The next one will be Thursday 19th November. Save the date! #Norwich
The next one will be Thursday 19th November. Save the date! #Norwich
The best possible post-script to this whole internet saga
Now that my landlord has come and carved a hole in the wall with a breadknife and I've got a coaxial cable stretched across my apartment...
...the building internet is back up LMAO
Now that my landlord has come and carved a hole in the wall with a breadknife and I've got a coaxial cable stretched across my apartment...
...the building internet is back up LMAO
October 21, 2026 at 11:24 PM
The best possible post-script to this whole internet saga
Now that my landlord has come and carved a hole in the wall with a breadknife and I've got a coaxial cable stretched across my apartment...
...the building internet is back up LMAO
Now that my landlord has come and carved a hole in the wall with a breadknife and I've got a coaxial cable stretched across my apartment...
...the building internet is back up LMAO
"I am just a lowly bookseller from Thune," may end up being what I tell the cops next time I get pulled over.
There is Not enough Potroast content, and an enchanted breadknife who is not name Breadlee doesn't make up for that.
There is Not enough Potroast content, and an enchanted breadknife who is not name Breadlee doesn't make up for that.
October 17, 2026 at 12:36 AM
"I am just a lowly bookseller from Thune," may end up being what I tell the cops next time I get pulled over.
There is Not enough Potroast content, and an enchanted breadknife who is not name Breadlee doesn't make up for that.
There is Not enough Potroast content, and an enchanted breadknife who is not name Breadlee doesn't make up for that.
I'm not a lawyer, and you def. won't catch me playin' one on TV.
Breadknife
ALT: Breadknife
static.klipy.com
October 15, 2026 at 7:54 PM
I'm not a lawyer, and you def. won't catch me playin' one on TV.
‘It’s not quite a satire on the theatre world but says more about acting than Rachel Cusk does in her latest novel, 𝘓𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘔. It’s not a surreal parable but the central bag image is as haunting as Kafka’s 𝘔𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘴.’
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison · Sudden Breadknife Frenzy: ‘Black Bag’
Luke Kennard’s Black Bag spans several genres while not belonging to any of them. It’s not quite a campus novel but...
www.lrb.co.uk
October 13, 2026 at 10:11 AM
‘It’s not quite a satire on the theatre world but says more about acting than Rachel Cusk does in her latest novel, 𝘓𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘔. It’s not a surreal parable but the central bag image is as haunting as Kafka’s 𝘔𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘴.’
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
“A novel centred entirely on the experiment would be minimalist, but ‘Black Bag’ sprawls because Kennard is enjoying himself.”
In @lrb.co.uk, Blake Morrison reviews Luke Kennard’s new novel, “Black Bag” - www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
In @lrb.co.uk, Blake Morrison reviews Luke Kennard’s new novel, “Black Bag” - www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison · Sudden Breadknife Frenzy: ‘Black Bag’
Luke Kennard’s Black Bag spans several genres while not belonging to any of them. It’s not quite a campus novel but...
www.lrb.co.uk
October 13, 2026 at 1:37 PM
“A novel centred entirely on the experiment would be minimalist, but ‘Black Bag’ sprawls because Kennard is enjoying himself.”
In @lrb.co.uk, Blake Morrison reviews Luke Kennard’s new novel, “Black Bag” - www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
In @lrb.co.uk, Blake Morrison reviews Luke Kennard’s new novel, “Black Bag” - www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
‘The virtue of the black bag is that it’s “not really reminiscent of anything” – not religion (despite the hint of a monastic robe), not the military (despite its being a body bag) and not sexual fetishism.’
Blake Morrison on Luke Kennard
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison on Luke Kennard
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison · Sudden Breadknife Frenzy: ‘Black Bag’
Luke Kennard’s Black Bag spans several genres while not belonging to any of them. It’s not quite a campus novel but...
www.lrb.co.uk
October 12, 2026 at 7:15 AM
‘The virtue of the black bag is that it’s “not really reminiscent of anything” – not religion (despite the hint of a monastic robe), not the military (despite its being a body bag) and not sexual fetishism.’
Blake Morrison on Luke Kennard
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison on Luke Kennard
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
‘The Patriot Platformers won’t have read 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨, then, so they’ll have missed its diagnosis of men as melodramatic, childlike, pitiful and dangerous.’
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s Booker-shortlisted novel.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s Booker-shortlisted novel.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison · Sudden Breadknife Frenzy: ‘Black Bag’
Luke Kennard’s Black Bag spans several genres while not belonging to any of them. It’s not quite a campus novel but...
www.lrb.co.uk
October 10, 2026 at 6:00 PM
‘The Patriot Platformers won’t have read 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨, then, so they’ll have missed its diagnosis of men as melodramatic, childlike, pitiful and dangerous.’
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s Booker-shortlisted novel.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s Booker-shortlisted novel.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
‘It’s not quite a satire on the theatre world but says more about acting than Rachel Cusk does in her latest novel, 𝘓𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘔. It’s not a surreal parable but the central bag image is as haunting as Kafka’s 𝘔𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘴.’
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison · Sudden Breadknife Frenzy: ‘Black Bag’
Luke Kennard’s Black Bag spans several genres while not belonging to any of them. It’s not quite a campus novel but...
www.lrb.co.uk
October 9, 2026 at 9:15 PM
‘It’s not quite a satire on the theatre world but says more about acting than Rachel Cusk does in her latest novel, 𝘓𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘔. It’s not a surreal parable but the central bag image is as haunting as Kafka’s 𝘔𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘴.’
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison reads Luke Kennard’s 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
‘Have Danny Tommo and his followers in Patriot Platform read 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨? Even the dust jacket might be enough to persuade a Stop the Boats protester that covering yourself in a black bag is an advance on black balaclavas and Mosleyite black shirts.’
Blake Morrison:
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison:
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison · Sudden Breadknife Frenzy: ‘Black Bag’
Luke Kennard’s Black Bag spans several genres while not belonging to any of them. It’s not quite a campus novel but...
www.lrb.co.uk
October 8, 2026 at 7:05 PM
‘Have Danny Tommo and his followers in Patriot Platform read 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨? Even the dust jacket might be enough to persuade a Stop the Boats protester that covering yourself in a black bag is an advance on black balaclavas and Mosleyite black shirts.’
Blake Morrison:
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison:
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
*Visitng Goth Aunt in Tipperary*
Me: “You must like it here, right? You’ve been in Nenagh for decades.”
G.A “ Nenagh?Let me tell you about Nenagh.”
Me: “ Go on”
G.A. “Nenagh! I’d fuckin’ BURRRRN it”
All delivered in that old school Limerick Citaaaay accent you could cut with a breadknife.
Me: “You must like it here, right? You’ve been in Nenagh for decades.”
G.A “ Nenagh?Let me tell you about Nenagh.”
Me: “ Go on”
G.A. “Nenagh! I’d fuckin’ BURRRRN it”
All delivered in that old school Limerick Citaaaay accent you could cut with a breadknife.
October 8, 2026 at 4:30 AM
*Visitng Goth Aunt in Tipperary*
Me: “You must like it here, right? You’ve been in Nenagh for decades.”
G.A “ Nenagh?Let me tell you about Nenagh.”
Me: “ Go on”
G.A. “Nenagh! I’d fuckin’ BURRRRN it”
All delivered in that old school Limerick Citaaaay accent you could cut with a breadknife.
Me: “You must like it here, right? You’ve been in Nenagh for decades.”
G.A “ Nenagh?Let me tell you about Nenagh.”
Me: “ Go on”
G.A. “Nenagh! I’d fuckin’ BURRRRN it”
All delivered in that old school Limerick Citaaaay accent you could cut with a breadknife.
On Luke Kennard’s Black Bag, which is very good. An absurd campus novel and more besides.
Blake Morrison · Sudden Breadknife Frenzy: ‘Black Bag’
Luke Kennard’s Black Bag spans several genres while not belonging to any of them. It’s not quite a campus novel but...
www.lrb.co.uk
October 6, 2026 at 9:24 PM
On Luke Kennard’s Black Bag, which is very good. An absurd campus novel and more besides.
‘The narrator of 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨 is no Patriot Platformer. With his jeans and hoop earrings, he’d be bohemian if bohemianism were affordable rather than “cosplay for bored kids with private incomes”.’
Blake Morrison on Luke Kennard’s Booker-shortlisted novel.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison on Luke Kennard’s Booker-shortlisted novel.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison · Sudden Breadknife Frenzy: ‘Black Bag’
Luke Kennard’s Black Bag spans several genres while not belonging to any of them. It’s not quite a campus novel but...
www.lrb.co.uk
October 5, 2026 at 11:00 AM
‘The narrator of 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨 is no Patriot Platformer. With his jeans and hoop earrings, he’d be bohemian if bohemianism were affordable rather than “cosplay for bored kids with private incomes”.’
Blake Morrison on Luke Kennard’s Booker-shortlisted novel.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison on Luke Kennard’s Booker-shortlisted novel.
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
A change of lineup for this month’s Breadknife Music Open Mic/Showcase gig due to unforeseen circumstances. Massive thanks to the amazing South of Polaris for stepping in. Definitely not one to be missed, 22nd October - put it on your calendar! #Norwich
October 4, 2026 at 8:13 PM
A change of lineup for this month’s Breadknife Music Open Mic/Showcase gig due to unforeseen circumstances. Massive thanks to the amazing South of Polaris for stepping in. Definitely not one to be missed, 22nd October - put it on your calendar! #Norwich
🚶♂️ Track Update: Breadknife and Grand High Tops walk (Warrumbungle National Park)
✅ Now Open: 🟢 Open
#NPWS #Hiking #TrackStatus #NSW
🌤️ 🌡️ Mild: 13.8°C to 22.9°C | 🌧️ Wet: 17.8mm rain expected | 💨 Windy: gusts to 43.9km/h | ☀️ High U
✅ Now Open: 🟢 Open
#NPWS #Hiking #TrackStatus #NSW
🌤️ 🌡️ Mild: 13.8°C to 22.9°C | 🌧️ Wet: 17.8mm rain expected | 💨 Windy: gusts to 43.9km/h | ☀️ High U
October 3, 2026 at 10:54 PM
🚶♂️ Track Update: Breadknife and Grand High Tops walk (Warrumbungle National Park)
✅ Now Open: 🟢 Open
#NPWS #Hiking #TrackStatus #NSW
🌤️ 🌡️ Mild: 13.8°C to 22.9°C | 🌧️ Wet: 17.8mm rain expected | 💨 Windy: gusts to 43.9km/h | ☀️ High U
✅ Now Open: 🟢 Open
#NPWS #Hiking #TrackStatus #NSW
🌤️ 🌡️ Mild: 13.8°C to 22.9°C | 🌧️ Wet: 17.8mm rain expected | 💨 Windy: gusts to 43.9km/h | ☀️ High U
‘Have Danny Tommo and his followers in Patriot Platform read 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨? Even the dust jacket might be enough to persuade a Stop the Boats protester that covering yourself in a black bag is an advance on black balaclavas and Mosleyite black shirts.’
Blake Morrison:
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison:
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison · Sudden Breadknife Frenzy: ‘Black Bag’
Luke Kennard’s Black Bag spans several genres while not belonging to any of them. It’s not quite a campus novel but...
www.lrb.co.uk
October 1, 2026 at 7:05 AM
‘Have Danny Tommo and his followers in Patriot Platform read 𝘉𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘉𝘢𝘨? Even the dust jacket might be enough to persuade a Stop the Boats protester that covering yourself in a black bag is an advance on black balaclavas and Mosleyite black shirts.’
Blake Morrison:
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
Blake Morrison:
www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...
