Dan the Architect 🎧
@danthearchitect.bsky.social
Fluent in sarcasm and writing my own shitposts. A very serious source of news. Huge fan of boneless potato skins and making music sometimes. Cilantro activist.
Creator of Verbatim: Video Editor (iOS).
Creator of Verbatim: Video Editor (iOS).
Pinned
Follow back people that make you laugh and mute the ones that demand your outrage.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
if posts are skeets, then threads can be ropes
September 19, 2026 at 4:19 PM
if posts are skeets, then threads can be ropes
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
thigh gap is what I call the time between eating pieces of chicken
September 14, 2026 at 4:15 PM
thigh gap is what I call the time between eating pieces of chicken
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
After 40+ years of waking up grumpy, I think it's time to acknowledge becoming a morning person isn't in my future.
September 9, 2026 at 11:46 AM
After 40+ years of waking up grumpy, I think it's time to acknowledge becoming a morning person isn't in my future.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
It’s dangerous to go alone, take this
September 4, 2026 at 3:51 PM
It’s dangerous to go alone, take this
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
oh, you're eating a piece of tres leches cake? that's so cute. *takes a bite of cinco leches cake while holding fork with pinky finger raised up*
September 4, 2026 at 12:41 PM
oh, you're eating a piece of tres leches cake? that's so cute. *takes a bite of cinco leches cake while holding fork with pinky finger raised up*
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Netscape would never have done this to you
September 3, 2026 at 2:27 AM
Netscape would never have done this to you
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Re-entering the human race like, “Fuck.”
September 1, 2026 at 12:42 PM
Re-entering the human race like, “Fuck.”
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
show me in the Bible where it says it’s gots to be called Ontario
August 29, 2026 at 10:48 PM
show me in the Bible where it says it’s gots to be called Ontario
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
“sleep when the baby sleeps” they said
then they said “ma’am you can’t sleep here this is a wendy’s drive thru”
then they said “ma’am you can’t sleep here this is a wendy’s drive thru”
August 29, 2026 at 3:48 AM
“sleep when the baby sleeps” they said
then they said “ma’am you can’t sleep here this is a wendy’s drive thru”
then they said “ma’am you can’t sleep here this is a wendy’s drive thru”
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
If it’s broke, don’t fix it.
Everybody knows you don’t know how to fix shit.
If it’s broke, don’t fix it.
Everybody knows you don’t know how to fix shit.
August 28, 2026 at 1:29 PM
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
If it’s broke, don’t fix it.
Everybody knows you don’t know how to fix shit.
If it’s broke, don’t fix it.
Everybody knows you don’t know how to fix shit.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
My therapist asked me if I wanted to try micro dosing LSD but I see no reason to cut back that drastically.
August 28, 2026 at 2:15 AM
My therapist asked me if I wanted to try micro dosing LSD but I see no reason to cut back that drastically.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
it's honestly brutal living in a world where people who pushed NFTs were allowed to just move on from that. they didn't even get less smug!!
August 26, 2026 at 5:32 AM
it's honestly brutal living in a world where people who pushed NFTs were allowed to just move on from that. they didn't even get less smug!!
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
sometimes, i don’t get the credit (any) for being a visionary
August 27, 2026 at 12:31 AM
sometimes, i don’t get the credit (any) for being a visionary
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
spiderman brand new day, might be tom holland's greatest performance in his entire repertoire, i think it would be accurate to refer to it as mr. holland's opus
August 24, 2026 at 1:26 AM
spiderman brand new day, might be tom holland's greatest performance in his entire repertoire, i think it would be accurate to refer to it as mr. holland's opus
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
it would be funny if it weren’t so sad. hollywood needs to accept it will never top the apex of cinematic genius: the scene in better off dead (1985) when the clay hamburger sings everybody wants some. any “movie” after is vile dogshit wasting time that could have been used watching the burger sing
August 21, 2026 at 5:13 AM
it would be funny if it weren’t so sad. hollywood needs to accept it will never top the apex of cinematic genius: the scene in better off dead (1985) when the clay hamburger sings everybody wants some. any “movie” after is vile dogshit wasting time that could have been used watching the burger sing
no Piscopo, is Perry ok?
no Pesci, is Piscopo ok?
sorry, we don’t have copke, is joe pesci ok?
August 19, 2026 at 9:13 PM
no Piscopo, is Perry ok?
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
no Pesci, is Piscopo ok?
sorry, we don’t have copke, is joe pesci ok?
August 19, 2026 at 8:49 PM
no Pesci, is Piscopo ok?
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
Fun Fact: In 1972, this was the AMC Mogwai but someone fed it gasoline after midnight.
July 4, 2026 at 12:59 PM
Fun Fact: In 1972, this was the AMC Mogwai but someone fed it gasoline after midnight.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
me: what kind of ice cream you got?
store clerk: it's Ben & Jerrys
me:[slides $20 across the counter] and whose is it now?
store clerk: it's Ben & Jerrys
me:[slides $20 across the counter] and whose is it now?
August 8, 2026 at 3:55 PM
me: what kind of ice cream you got?
store clerk: it's Ben & Jerrys
me:[slides $20 across the counter] and whose is it now?
store clerk: it's Ben & Jerrys
me:[slides $20 across the counter] and whose is it now?
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
sometimes I’ll be having a nice day then suddenly remember that I used to wear a Ramones t-shirt with a tweed blazer in high school and should have gotten my ass kicked
August 15, 2026 at 3:06 PM
sometimes I’ll be having a nice day then suddenly remember that I used to wear a Ramones t-shirt with a tweed blazer in high school and should have gotten my ass kicked
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
I sometimes point out “I ain’t no fool”…but it’s a lie—I am in fact at least 80% fool.
January 11, 2024 at 5:11 PM
I sometimes point out “I ain’t no fool”…but it’s a lie—I am in fact at least 80% fool.
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
only the smartest 1% of intellectual nerds will get this: 80085
August 5, 2026 at 1:45 PM
only the smartest 1% of intellectual nerds will get this: 80085
Reposted by Dan the Architect 🎧
“I asked ChatGPT, I asked Grok”
Yeah well I asked a Halo 3 lobby and they all said you’re a dumb bitch
Yeah well I asked a Halo 3 lobby and they all said you’re a dumb bitch
August 4, 2026 at 6:58 PM
“I asked ChatGPT, I asked Grok”
Yeah well I asked a Halo 3 lobby and they all said you’re a dumb bitch
Yeah well I asked a Halo 3 lobby and they all said you’re a dumb bitch