Thank u guys for 1.5k y'all can each have a pack of cig newtons, my treat
January 11, 2025 at 10:47 PM
Thank u guys for 1.5k y'all can each have a pack of cig newtons, my treat
PSA: Please DO NOT look directly at the Oreos without a protective pair of Fig Newtons.
April 7, 2024 at 8:39 PM
PSA: Please DO NOT look directly at the Oreos without a protective pair of Fig Newtons.
Fig Newtons are the Branson, Missouri of snacks.
April 11, 2025 at 8:36 PM
Fig Newtons are the Branson, Missouri of snacks.
are there Newtons of any other kind of fruit or just Figs. apple newtons. banana. strawberry-peach newtons
completely fuckin choked at the snacks store the other night btw real shameful work
May 24, 2026 at 12:15 PM
are there Newtons of any other kind of fruit or just Figs. apple newtons. banana. strawberry-peach newtons
Ad right across the facemask like
January 24, 2026 at 12:09 AM
Ad right across the facemask like
I could FUCK UP
some fig newtons rn ngl
some fig newtons rn ngl
October 1, 2026 at 3:15 AM
I could FUCK UP
some fig newtons rn ngl
some fig newtons rn ngl
I crave newtons and whoever sends me several crates of newtons to venezuela gets my undying love
Grape Newtons (1987-1994): Chewy, flaky golden Newton cookies, filled with a thick Concord grape paste
September 30, 2026 at 7:57 PM
I crave newtons and whoever sends me several crates of newtons to venezuela gets my undying love
That really figs my newtons. Really fruits my cake.
June 16, 2026 at 11:56 PM
That really figs my newtons. Really fruits my cake.
Grape Newtons (1987-1994): Chewy, flaky golden Newton cookies, filled with a thick Concord grape paste
March 19, 2026 at 5:10 PM
Grape Newtons (1987-1994): Chewy, flaky golden Newton cookies, filled with a thick Concord grape paste
i cannot stop myself from eating fig newtons
August 15, 2026 at 11:06 PM
i cannot stop myself from eating fig newtons
organic newtons are fig naturals
June 7, 2024 at 4:30 AM
organic newtons are fig naturals
Fig Newtons are homework the food
May 24, 2026 at 1:39 AM
Fig Newtons are homework the food
I want a bowl of breaded grapes. Give me Grape Newtons
May 25, 2025 at 2:13 AM
I want a bowl of breaded grapes. Give me Grape Newtons
completely fuckin choked at the snacks store the other night btw real shameful work
May 24, 2026 at 1:17 AM
completely fuckin choked at the snacks store the other night btw real shameful work
happy halloween from samwise gamgee and frodo baggins! cloaks vests and shirts handmade by grandma, lembas bread by fig newtons corporation
October 31, 2025 at 1:14 PM
happy halloween from samwise gamgee and frodo baggins! cloaks vests and shirts handmade by grandma, lembas bread by fig newtons corporation
One of the fig newtons in the box is a trick newton—a lever that activates a trapdoor which deposits the unsuspecting victim into gloomy pit (that is lined with many more fig newtons).
September 24, 2026 at 3:46 AM
One of the fig newtons in the box is a trick newton—a lever that activates a trapdoor which deposits the unsuspecting victim into gloomy pit (that is lined with many more fig newtons).
What’s the funniest real-world advertising slogan to imagine Don Draper coming up with? Right now for me it’s “A cookie is just a cookie. But Newtons are fruit and cake.”
May 2, 2026 at 4:50 PM
What’s the funniest real-world advertising slogan to imagine Don Draper coming up with? Right now for me it’s “A cookie is just a cookie. But Newtons are fruit and cake.”
Strawberry ice cream with strawberry syrup, strawberry preserves, and strawberry newtons.
The Ultimate Strawbulation.
The Ultimate Strawbulation.
May 21, 2025 at 7:09 AM
Strawberry ice cream with strawberry syrup, strawberry preserves, and strawberry newtons.
The Ultimate Strawbulation.
The Ultimate Strawbulation.
i remember fig newtons being better
August 15, 2025 at 4:22 AM
i remember fig newtons being better
What’s your favorite “old people” snack? I love fig newtons and ginger snaps. Iced oatmeal cookies too. YEZZIRRRR
August 18, 2025 at 9:24 PM
What’s your favorite “old people” snack? I love fig newtons and ginger snaps. Iced oatmeal cookies too. YEZZIRRRR
cookies filled with pork fat (pig newtons)
June 20, 2025 at 7:03 PM
cookies filled with pork fat (pig newtons)
Yall might call me old, but the strawberry fig newtons are fire.
October 21, 2025 at 12:39 AM
Yall might call me old, but the strawberry fig newtons are fire.
anyone else need a smoke?
January 22, 2025 at 4:34 AM
anyone else need a smoke?
Saw someone (not a mutual) posting that fig newtons are a lot of work, and I had to refrain from replying "actually, fig newtons are a lot of force; if they're a lot of work, then they're fig joules"
October 5, 2025 at 9:19 AM
Saw someone (not a mutual) posting that fig newtons are a lot of work, and I had to refrain from replying "actually, fig newtons are a lot of force; if they're a lot of work, then they're fig joules"
Gross things I like:
Candy Corn
Fig Newtons
Fruit cake
Mincemeat pie
Circus Peanuts
Buttered popcorn Jelly Bellies
Men
Candy Corn
Fig Newtons
Fruit cake
Mincemeat pie
Circus Peanuts
Buttered popcorn Jelly Bellies
Men
November 27, 2024 at 4:34 AM
Gross things I like:
Candy Corn
Fig Newtons
Fruit cake
Mincemeat pie
Circus Peanuts
Buttered popcorn Jelly Bellies
Men
Candy Corn
Fig Newtons
Fruit cake
Mincemeat pie
Circus Peanuts
Buttered popcorn Jelly Bellies
Men